Forgiveness

Today is the big day! As much as I don't want to say it.. I'm truly excited for this special stage. The choreography came out so well, mostly thanks to Hoseok... and Jungkook.

There's a bit too much sexiness in this choreo but I'm kind of into it. It's really out of my comfort zone and I'm really excited to show my fans a different side of me.

I go backstage a bit earlier than everyone just to look around and explore. While I'm exploring I think about Chanyeol... I'm sad that he won't be able to make it. But I can see his reaction in person when he arrives tomorrow. One week without him really drove me mad, but I had a bit of time to focus on myself.

I finish up my exploring around the venue and I go back into my changing room. I see that staff and make up artists from Big Hit had already started to arrive. Before we get to change into our stage outfits we have to do one last rehearsal on the stage. But for some reason Jungkook isn't anywhere to be found.

His security guards immediately freak out, scared to lose their jobs, and begin searching. I sit patiently in my chair, scrolling on my phone. I'm sure he'll turn up eventually.

Ten minutes have passed and it's getting close to the time we have to start our rehearsal before the show. I get up from my chair and decide to take matters into my own hands and find him. I search around for a few minutes until I end up at a staircase that leads up to the roof. I decide to go there and check there just in case.

As I climb up the stairs I recognize Jungkook's voice. I peek out and see Jungkook talking to IU, and the conversation seems pretty heated...  As much as I dont want to interrupt I know that I have to.

I clear my throat so they can hear my presence. "Um Jungkook, we have to rehearse... like right now." I say uncomfortably.

He looks at me and nods. I don't wait for him to follow me I immediately go back down the stairs before things get any more awkward.

I quickly hurry to my dressing room and a few minutes later, Jungkook arrives. The security guards storm in front of him and begin asking him one hundred questions at a time. He ignores them and gets ready for rehearsal.

Rehearsal went smoothly and I'm sure that we're gonna kill this performance. But Jungkook just doesn't seem to be in the most wonderful mood right now. I hate seeing him like this so I try to give him a little smile of encouragement but he ignores it.

We stay backstage the whole time before our special stage because we're one of the first ones to perform. I watch all the other idols dance in awe. Everyone is so talented, I hope our performance is good as everyone else's.

"JUNGKOOK, Y/N ITS SHOW TIME." One producer says.

I jump in shock but I'm ready. I'm ready to kill this! I go next to Jungkook to try to lift his spirits up.

"Hey we can do this!" I say and smile brightly.

He smiles back and gives me a nod.

"I'm glad I did this, it was actually fun." I say.

"Yeah, I guess it was. Thank yo-"

"SHOW TIME! TAKE YOUR PLACES!"

"Let's do this!" I say and give him a fist bump.

I guess I took the first step to forgiveness...

(THE PERFORMANCE)

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

As the lights dim the fans are going crazy, and I decide to go over and give Jungkook a hug on the stage. The performance was so good! Our voices sounded amazing and our dance moves were excellent. Honestly I wouldn't have wanted to do this special stage with anyone other than him.

We get off the stage and I'm jumping up and down from excitement.

"We did it! WE DID THAT!" I say jumping in place.

"Thank you for being my dance partner!" He shyly says. "We should celebrate!"

"I agree!" I say smiling lightly "I'll call the boys and ask them to come along."

He nods.

I quickly go back into my dressing room and grab my phone to text in the group chat if they want to come along. Everyone replies fast and they're more than excited to come along. But mostly I think they're happier because Jungkook and I are getting along again.

As I'm about to leave the changing room I run into IU. "Hey I was just looking for you!" She says.

I pause.

"...me?" I say turning around to see if there's anyone else behind me. I'm sure she's mistaken.

"Yeah I just wanted to talk to you about something, do you mind if I come in?"

I nod letting her in.

She sits on the couch while I go and sit in front of her. We sit in silence for a while.

I clear my throat trying to start a conversation not to make things seem awkward...

"So.." I begin "What do you want to talk about."

She obviously seems nervous. It seems like something really is bothering her. I feel like I've done something wrong when I know that I haven't.

"This is really hard for me to say, and I don't know where to start from.."

I nod in understatement. "Take all the time you need."

"So, you see I'm just going to say it. I think that you should know the whole truth.. and you shouldn't be kept in the dark."

At this point I'm as nervous as she is. The anticipation is killing me.

"I actually have a boyfriend... and no it's not Jungkook and no I'm not cheating on him. How do I tell you... we're not actually together it's all for publicity but don't worry I'm breaking up with him tonight. Because It's been effecting my relationship with my current boyfriend who isn't an idol and I don't want him to feel upset. You know?" She says everything really fast that it takes me a minute to process everything.

"You see Jungkook is great, really, but I have someone else who I love. And I'm risking it all for this guy, I just want to be happy even if that's losing my career and fans. I have a life too and I want to be free and love whoever I want." She continues.

"Jungkook didn't want me to tell you the whole truth but I knew that you should know. I put myself in your shoes and it just didn't feel right to keep you in the dark and for you to suffer. He cares about you Y/n, you may not see it because he's bottling up his emotions and not letting anyone in. But he does really care about you."
She finishes.

I'm left speechless. Out of every possible thing she could of said I wasn't expecting it to be this.

"Th..thank you." I say and leave without looking back.

I need to go home. Today has been a roller coaster of emotions I can't take anything more.

All I want right now is to be in Chanyeol's arms... I think.

authors note:
Um.. HI! Happy 2020! First off I want to apologize for the lack of chapters and updating. But recently I really wanted to try to get into writing again. I hope that everyone is keeping safe and enjoying this book! Please if you have any recommendations or comments don't be scared to share them with me!

Thank you for all the support!
Have a wonderful day/night

I love you! ❤️❤️❤️