Once I got out of rehab I still had a hard time getting back on my feet. Even though I still have my addiction, I have an apartment and a job. I take drug tests still because of the two times I've been caught by my family. They know I gave up hope. I told them no one will love me and no one will. I'm almost 40 and still haven't gotten married. Engaged? Yes. Just not married.

I hate knowing my family is hoping I get out of this and I'm constantly letting them down. I'm trying to hid it to them as much as possible. They said next time I enter rehab, I'm officially disowned by my family. My best friend had that same problem for her cocaine addiction. Sadly, her family did disown her. I wish I could quit and be down with like how she is now, but it's so hard to quit cold turkey.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I went to work the next morning. I work at a photography studio. I don't take the pictures because I'm not that great at photography. I'm just the receptionist who makes appointments. Not the best job, but it pays well. Everyone is very nice except the owner. The owner always seems to have a stick up his ass and makes everyone's day just go downhill once he walks into the room. "Morning Jessie," Shelby said to me. Shelby was a good guy. He treated me as a sister rather than a co-worker.

"Hey Shelby how have you been?" I said.

"Good. I heard that owner is coming in today with his daughter." My jaw dropped. The thought of him having sex with another person blew my mind.

"What poor, innocent soul would want his satanic offspring?" I asked Shelby.

"No idea," he said "but hopefully he will be nice to us today."

We soon heard the door bell go off and it was the owner with his 12 year old daughter. She was very pretty. Long blonde hair, freckles, and light blue eyes that looked a lot like the sky. I was starting to wonder if that girl was has evil or just like her father but with a different look. "Shelby, Jessie this is my daughter Carter," said Mr. Porter. Mr.Porter has that face that makes you think he is a nice guy but is actually a nightmare. That's what made the interview for me so awkward when I finally started working here.

"Hello," Shelby and I said. She just waved her hand. My guess is that she wasn't that much of a talker. They went over to a room that people get the pictures taken it. I started tapping my foot at my desk. It was always hard for me not to get a hit when I'm at work. Shelby knew about the addiction she he got me a stress ball to help me in case I need one during work. Normally this doesn't happen but I don't know why today suddenly changed.

~~~~~~~~~~

After work I like to go to the café near my house. It's not one of those chain cafés either. It's a local one and I love it. I always go in there and order the same thing. An espresso. I know. Pretty wild right? I sat by the window and did some at home work I had to do for my job. "Mind if I sit with you?" A voice asked. I looked up and saw a man. He had nice black hair, brown eyes, and a little bit of facial hair.

"Oh no," I said. "I don't mind at all." He sat down next to me eating a tuna sandwich and a chocolate Frappuccino. I went back to doing my work, but part of me couldn't help but stare every once in awhile.

"Um......is everything ok?" He asked me.

"Oh yes sorry," I said. " I just think you're really handsome is all." After saying that I felt much better. At the same time though, I've never told a complete stranger that. Most of the people I dated started out as friends, but this time it was different.

"Well if it makes you feel better, I think you're pretty cute yourself," he said. I started to blush. I could feel it on my cheeks. I slowly started closing my laptop as if I was getting ready to leave. "Hey before you go, do you want to catch a movie sometime?" I nodded. I gave him my number and left. Today was good so I found no need to go to my happy place, but as long as I know it's there that's all that matters.