a first responder's first

"Cap, I think we came in from the wrong angle!" Josephine examined the position of the ladder towards the rollercoaster cart. The 118 team were called in when a young man was thrown off during the ride, now another is hanging off. She, Bobby, and Buck were standing on the ladder while Hen and Chimney attended to the young man on the ground.

Bobby peered and sighed in agreement, "Damn, you're right Josie." He faced the blond man. "Buck, I'm gonna have you climb up and harness the man then wait for the truck to get to you. Can you handle that?"

They were working on the clock between saving the lives of the civilians petrified on the cart upside down, especially the young man literally hanging for his life. As well the pressure of the large crowds forming behind them with their phones recording. With the fact their truck positioned wrong for easy access, only made it riskier for this rescue.

Seemingly enthralled of the idea, Buck grinned. "Hell yeah! This daredevil hero stuff is what I signed up for, Bobby!"

"Good." His captain replied, however, shared a slight of concern with Josephine. Except, the two trusted Buck and the hope everything will go smoothly. They helped Buck gear up then watched him climb the ladder to the civilians in the rollercoaster cart.

Upon hearing the cries of the civilians, Buck shouted. "Everybody try to stay calm! I'm going to get you down, I promise. I going to need you relax. I need you to breathe, and keep as still as possible." He assured them before situating himself on the track of the rollercoaster.

Below them, Bobby and Josephine's eyes maintained on Buck. She blew through her lips while silently praying for everyone up there.

"Hey, what's your name man?" Buck casually asked as a protocol to comfort a frantic civilian in these life threatening situations.

Sweating from the tight grip to the bar and heaving rapidly, the man responded. "Devon!"

"Devon? All right, Devon. Well hang on, brother." Buck proceeded to take caution in his steps to reach to the young man hanging and others in the cart.

Crying out, Devon asked. "Where's Chad?" Likely referring to his friend who flung off from the ride next to him. "What happened to Chad?"

Buck called in on the radio, "Josie, he's asking about his friend."

She and Bobby attempted to peeked where Chimney and Hen attended to the fallen civilian. Pressing on the radio, Josephine spoke. "Chimney, it's Josie. Do you copy?"

"Copy, Josie. What do you need?" Chimney responded.

Her eyes remain intact on Buck and the helpless civilians on the rollercoaster. "How's the kid on the ground?" She questioned.

Both her captain and herself were doubtful that the young man survived being thrown off at the speed rate of the ride. Yet, they always try to be hopeful. "We lost him." Chimney sighed out on the radio.

When Josephine glanced up at Bobby with a knowing look, he intervened. "All right, I don't need the people up there seeing that. Do me a favor. He's survived, right? Put him on a gurney, you know the drill." He instructed.

"Copy that."

The situation is already intense enough and with the big crowd recording from every angle and second of it, the team didn't need to frightened either parties by insinuating the young man was dead. Josephine and Bobby reverted back to Buck paving his way towards the group at the top. Both hoped the other young man clutching for his life has the patience and will be handled safely by Buck.

Josephine took one more glance before moving the rig from the rollercoaster to drive off to the other side. Meanwhile, Buck fixated himself on Devon and attaching the clasps of the harness to have him loop his arm through the strap. Although, Devon couldn't focus with the large crowd at the bottom recording the scene. His thoughts and emotions tackled on each other negatively.

Buck persisted Devon that he'll be okay once taking his hand. Patience was the key for this situation to go well. Even with his calming tone and outstretched hand to secure Devon's safety, it was too late. Devon released himself in front of Buck to watch him hit the ground causing a wave of screams and gasps at the tragic scene.

Every witness of that night had been left speechless, "Oh my God."

The next morning, Buck sat dwelling at his empty cup of coffee. He couldn't express the sadness and overwhelming emotions he felt, though everyone knew those feelings. They've all been in the exact position that Buck's currently sitting in. While Bobby continued to cook in the kitchen with Josephine's assistance, Chimney served Buck a full plate.

"I'm not hungry." He declined

Chimney disagreed, "It's America, Buck-a-roo. Eating has nothing to do with being hungry."

Josephine pondered at the blond man, sighing out. "I was right there. Y'know all he had to do was reach up and grab my hand." He ranted to the trio, glancing over at them.

She frowned and pour two cups of coffee before settling in a seat next to Buck. "People do funny things at times like that. Sometimes they just freeze up." She slid the mug to him who immediately rejected, but sent a look for him to take it.

"I've never lost anyone before...does it get any easier?" His eyes stared at the new cup of coffee in his hand then flickering up at his colleagues.

Bobby answered without any hesitation, "No."

Chimney cleared his throat and leaned forward, "Look, people die and that's part of the gig, right? Your problem is that you look at the job like a long term relationship. They're one night stands man. In that moment they mean everything to you, but once morning comes it's on to the next one."

"Nice analogy, Chimney." Josephine shared an intrigued expression before sipping from her mug.

The next second, Hen's voice tore the team's attention from the conversation to her and Athena waltzing in the room. "Hey! You guys don't mind I brought some company for family dinner?" She beamed while Buck rolled his eyes at the sight of the cop. "Athena is going through some stuff at home, so she could use some TLC." She teased as Chimney high fived her.

Bobby circled the countertop to greet the woman, "Well, we don't usually allow cops in secret firehouse meetings, but uh we can make an exception." He hugged her.

Josephine tapped on the blond man's shoulder, he looked up at her. "Play nice, Evan." She jokingly said then patted his cheek before leaving his side.

"There's my baby," Athena fondly greeted the young woman into her arms. She gushed about the woman who she's watched grow up before her eyes. To Josephine, Athena was another mother figure in her life. She worked with her father, Diego Santiago at the precinct until he died. Aside the civilians he protected during that earthquake, he saved Athena's life that day as well. "How are you and Bryan? Wedding is coming around the corner the next couple of months?"

"We're doing fine, Athena. Just narrowing down the checklist." Josephine giggled then retreated to her seat next to Buck.

Athena smiled then darted at the sight of the young man, averting her gaze across the table. "Y'know I'm ain't sold on you yet. I think keeping me from getting shot deserves a second chance." She stretched out her hand in the name of a clean slate.

Buck stared at her hand for a second then tugged a light grin, reaching out for a firm handshake. "There won't be third though." Everyone started laughing except Buck's smile faltering.

"Thena, Buck's having trouble moving on from a call that didn't go his way." Josephine added, noting the sad expression.

She nodded, "Y'know why they make us wear these uniforms, right? Cops, firefighters, paramedics?'

Chimney interrupted, "Uh...sex appeal?"

"So people can easily identify us?" Buck looked at her.

"Both true, but it's also for our own good." Athena stated and proceeded to lecture him. "When we take our uniform off at the end of the day, it symbolizes letting go. All the sad, crazy, and inhumane things we've seen that day."

"I see his face every time I close my eyes. It happened to you guys?" Buck's eyes search at the table where everyone quietly nodded.

Athena spoke up, "It'll pass."

A minute barely surpassed when the alarm set off in the firehouse. Everyone groaned as each scooped for a bite before running out to the trucks. Josephine noticed Buck frozen in his seat, "Coming, Buck?"

After hosing down a bushfire earlier that day, Buck went up to Josephine back at the firehouse if she could accompany him to Devon's memorial after their shift. Of course, she wouldn't decline as it seemed he needed the support to overcome the traumatic experience. When she returned home, her abuelito Matthew Santiago, known as LAPD's commissioner rang her up.

"Commissioner Santiago, what do I owe the pleasure?" She sarcastically greeted and dropped the keys into the marble bowl.

A chuckle escaped from the old man, "It's abuelito to you, young lady. How are you doing?"

"I'm doing well, abuelito. Just got off of my shift at the firehouse. Now, I'm going to shower and eat before the memorial with Buck later." She answered, slipping out of her shoes and resting her bag on the table.

The volume of her abuelito's voice rose on speaker after Josephine placed the phone on the counter in the kitchen. "That firefighter who saved the civilians on the rollercoaster the other night. How is he?"

She drummed her fingers onto the counter, "He's...working through it. It's not entirely easy to get over someone you lost during a call. Is that why you called?"

"Kind of. As your abuelito, I'd like to check up on one of the fiercest firefighters in the city. I worry about you a lot, mi princesa."

Josephine slipped in a black dress and heels inside the closet. She fixed her hair and make up when her phone rang on the bed. Rushing out the room, assuming Buck informing that he's arrived. Instead, the caller I.D. appeared to be her fiancé calling.

"Hey, did you call about your deal going through?" She inquired.

She listened to Bryan gushing on the other line, "Nothing is confirmed but I believe it went very well. We have dinner with the guys later to discuss about it. So, I'm free for an hour or so to talk to my beautiful fiancé. You're not busy, right?"

"Actually, I'm leaving in a few minutes to a memorial." She winced, grabbing her purse and exiting the master bedroom. "Buck is struggling about the guy he lost the other night. He asked if I could accompany him to the memorial."

"Oh yeah, I heard about that. He's been all over the news lately." Bryan said. "Well, he's lucky to have someone with you. Hope he feels better."

Inside the chapel, Josephine and Buck sat in the back watching Devon's sister taking the podium. Her eyes scanned the room of close family and friends of Devon. She looked over at the blond to see the nerves getting the best of him, especially his fidgeting hands on his lap.

Josephine naturally reached for his hand and intertwined them. He shot an odd look while she released a sigh. "Just trying to lessen your nerves, Evan. Take a deep breath for me?"

He nodded and deeply exhaled in response. She sent him a warm smile before leaving his gaze. Though his eyes remained on her, feeling the touch of her thumb grazing his knuckles. "My brother was a man of great potential." Buck glanced up at Devon's sister speaking. "That's the hardest part for me. Thank you all for coming." She finished.

The duo watched everyone rise to their feet and out of the pews to approach the grieving sister. Josephine sharply inhaled, "We can sit here for little longer, whenever you're ready." She squeezed his hand.

Buck shook his head, "I-I'm ready."

When they left the pew and stood in the back, the young dark haired woman spotted them. She excused herself and paved way towards them. Buck felt himself choked up when she inched closer. "Hi, I'm...um Buck...Evan. And, this is Josephine."

"We wanted to say on behalf of the 118 we're sorry for your loss." Josephine sent a sympathetic expression to the woman.

Buck licked his lips and stammered out, "It's only my fourth month on the job. I've never lost anyone before this."

Devon's sister directly stared at him, asking the one question that left her conflicted. "What really happened up there?"

"Uh...it was like...he gave up."

She scrunched her face in disbelief, "Are you saying it's my brother's fault he's dead?"

Josephine knitted her brows at the assumption, seeing Buck's quivered. "No...t-that's not what I mean." He solemnly expressed.

She scoffed, "My brother was very happy to be alive. He was loved, and he knew it. He wanted to live and you failed him." She emphasized in an infuriating tone. Distraught by the conversation and assumptions about her late brother, she turned away from the two.

Leaving Buck utterly loss for words and Josephine a bit upset by the woman yet knowing it's been tough on both parties. Someone wanted to blame the other for the worse things in life.

"She's mourning and angry that's all. Eventually, it'll come to her senses that it wasn't your fault." Josephine broke the silence in the Jeep as Buck kept quiet since pulling out of the parking lot. "We do our best in this job, and I know you tried your hardest with Devon. Sometimes we have to realize we can't save anyone who didn't want help."

He silently nodded, keeping is eyes on the road. "Yeah...which sucks." His eyes quickly looked at hers. "Thanks for coming with me...Josephine."

The 118 drove up to the front of a law firm building where a window washer's cable snapped, leaving him to hang by his harness and the strap wrapped around his ankle. As Buck and Josephine lifted their eyes at the civilian hanging, Bobby instructed the young man to climb up the ladder to approach the window washer. Josephine saw how triggered Buck became and opted he'll be quicker going to the roof and assure the cable would be secured.

Bobby loomed over at Josephine behind Buck, who shrugged. They knew it was all an excuse. Without fighting it, Bobby motioned to the idea. Josephine followed Buck and snatched the bags while their captain went on the ladder.

"I understand you're not ready yet, but you can't let your fear consume you forever, Evan." She said, tearing Buck from his stare at the ladder by her stern tone.

He huffed out, "I won't. It's just not the right time, today."

After the call, Josephine mindlessly descended the staircase when Bryan rang her up. She hoped to find privacy to talk to her fiancé in the locker room. Instead, she found herself intruding a conversation between Buck and Bobby. Both men darted at her as her lips parted in embarrassment, "Sorry, I'll go-" She began backing out until Bobby stopped her.

"No, it's fine. Buck needs all the advice he can get."

She faced the blond leaning back on the lockers, "Are you sure you want me to be here?"

He simply nodded, "You've been here for me the last few days. Doesn't matter to me."

Josephine further inside the room, leaning on the glass window near the door after rejecting the phone call. Buck pressed his lips together, "A year ago, I put in to be a Navy SEAL." He confessed to Bobby and Josephine's surprise.

"I didn't know you were in the Navy." Bobby said.

Buck lifted himself from the lockers, "I wasn't. You don't have to be in the Navy to try out for the seals." He entailed and moved to sit on the bench. "Just have to be particularly bad ass, which y'know...I am." His eyes switched between his captain and the brunette. "Didn't have any trouble with the physical part, following orders wasn't my best quality. But hey, I was working on it."

"Why didn't it stick?" Josephine mused as she saw Bobby settled next to the blond.

"They wanted machines." He answered. "People who could flip a switch in their head and turn off every natural human instinctive emotion in their body, and I cannot do that. I-I don't want to do that." He truthfully told. "I love this job because I get to be the tough guy, but also get to help people."

Both Bobby and Josephine stayed silent until Buck asked, "Who was the first person you lost?"

"Katherine Vance, 32 years old. Blond hair and green eyes. She was wearing a blue University of Michigan t-shirt with white shorts, and black converse high tops. She painted smiley faces on them toes." Bobby listed on recalling the memory. "The last thing she said to me was "please" then she was gone. Hit by a truck driver and I couldn't extract her in time."

Buck moved his gaze to the brunette standing by the glass window, "How about you?"

She shakily exhaled, fiddling with her engagement ring. "Um...Nancy Baker, 34 years old. She was traveling with her 6 year old daughter, Stacey for many hours. The exhaustion must've hit due to swerving on the road and the car flipped downhill. I managed to release her daughter but the car was about to explode. Nancy told me to take Stacey, accepting the fact I couldn't save her in time." She shuddered at the tragedy, reminiscing Nancy's urgent expression before the explosion. "Took me a while to understand her choice, she was a mother. They want best for their children, even sacrificing themselves for their sakes.

Silence infiltrated the room at the past ordeals they've faced. "I'm glad neither of you can flip that switch. I don't want you to." Bobby stared at the two young firefighters. "It's not going to make you a better firefighter. Somebody telling you that losing someone doesn't affect them is lying."

"Name and number of a trauma counselor." Bobby handed a card to Buck. "We have people in this department who can help us with this stuff. Don't have talk to me nor Josie, but you do have to talk to someone."

"Even if you're reluctant, just try it out." Josephine lastly said before leaving the room for Buck to ponder.

A dispatch called in a jumper at an apartment complex. Once the truck rolled up to the front, they saw a crowd surrounding the area where a couple shouted from above. Josephine jumped out of the truck and grabbed a bag not far behind Buck, who commented. "Seriously, it's gotta be a jumper- couldn't be threatening himself with a gun."

Hen and Josephine looked at each other as Hen retorted. "Right, 'cause that'll be preferable."

Buck furrowed at the women who passed him and stood next to Bobby and Chimney, looking up. The dispatch radioed where the man on the balcony stood and his girlfriend, screaming on the other. "We're gonna have to do the maneuver." Bobby directed at Buck.

"Oh, Bobby no."

Bobby ignored his protests. "Yes."

"I'll do it." Chimney volunteered.

"No, Buck's got this." He affirmed.

Seeing the sight of fear washing his face, the brunette rubbed his shoulder. "You got this." She enthused.

While Buck prepped into gear, Josephine followed Bobby into the apartment where the couple lived. Entering inside, they discovered the girlfriend shouting. "Fine, if you wanna jump. Go ahead and jump!" She exhausted a sigh when they arrived on the balcony. "I don't even know what to say to him anymore." She flailed her arms in defeat.

Josephine cocked her brow, "Telling him to jump is probably not the way to go." 

"He would not listen to me, okay!" She exclaimed to the firefighters. "He's convinced that I cheated and he'll keep going in circles-" She snapped her head at the glimpse of her boyfriend sticking his leg out. "Don't you dare do that, I swear to God!"

Bobby plainly asked, "Did you cheat on him?"

"Is that the right time for that?"

"All we're trying to do is understand and defuse the situation." The brunette gestured towards the boyfriend on the railing of the balcony next door.

She huffed and folded her arms, "Well, I didn't."

"Tell him you're sorry." Bobby simply said.

The woman ridiculed, "Absolutely not. I'm not going to admit that I cheated on him." Josephine fought to roll her eyes at the woman acting stubborn rather than acknowledge the options to save her boyfriend's life at this moment.

Bobby reasoned with her, "It doesn't have to be true, he just needs to hear that you're sorry. All right?"

"Fine." She surrendered before changing the tone of her voice. "Leonard, I'm sorry okay? I don't know what I was thinking, I love you and only you." She attempted to sound sincere.

Except, the man wasn't too convinced. "You lying bitch."

"Ugh, fine!"

Josephine pursed her lips, "I'm sorry, that was pathetic."

"Oh, come on! I tried my best."

Bobby sent the young brunette a look before he took over to speak to the man. "Hey, Leonard listen to me. We've all been there, man. I had a girlfriend cheat on me and...I thought she was the one, Leonard. I saw us going the whole way, marriage, kids all of it." He professed, gaining the man's attention. "So, I went out and bought her a ring. A nice one. We were on top of the Eiffel Tower. I got down on one knee and popped the question, everybody staring at us. She had tears in her eyes."

Josephine eyed at Leonard who was too distracted by Bobby's story, even the girlfriend. She pressed onto the radio and whispered to Buck waiting for his cue. "Now."

Seconds later, Buck swung in like Spiderman and kicked Leonard back into the apartment. Josephine rushed to Leonard's side to check on him while Buck jumped inside the balcony. She the relieving expression on his face in overcoming his fear. "Told you so. How about drinks at my place to celebrate?"

Buck took up Josephine's offer for a drink at her place after this tough week and talking to Devon's sister, who showed up at the firehouse. She apologized to the two then entailed about her brother's mental health history. In the end, Josephine knew this conversation between the grieving sister and Buck was much needed to move on.

"Damn, I can't believe you live here. Why haven't you invited me or host parties?" Buck was in awe of the penthouse, and couldn't stop talking about it since he arrived.

The brunette haired woman tilted her head as she scoop up a bite of her orange chicken and rice. "My grandfather on my mother's side owns properties. This is one of them, despite Bryan and I willing to pay for our own place." She laughed to herself. "I mean, we host parties for Bryan's company sometimes. Other than that, my life seems too busy to plan out parties. You're already invited to my wedding, doesn't that count?"

He hummed in agreement, "Man, getting married. I'm really happy for you, Josie. You haven't told me much about you and your fiancé, Bryan?" He took a sip of his beer. "Only that you two are childhood friends."

"Uh I think you're the only person that hasn't met him from the 118." She giggled out, setting her plate on the glass table. "He's always been there for me...sure, it's his obligation as a friend over the years. When he helped me grieve over my father and out of the darkest place in my life. I realized he was more than longtime friend, he's my soulmate. A bit cliché, though the way he confessed his feelings was that."

Buck grinned at the flushed brunette, "Wished I had something like that. Find someone to share a special relationship."

"Half of the time is less about scavenging when it could be someone under your nose." Josephine sipped her glass of wine.

"That sounds harder when I'm a magnet to women."

His response caused her to pinched the bridge of her nose. "You're not. You just can't keep it in your pants, Evan." She deadpanned. "I mean, you slept with your therapist!"

"I get it. Which is why I'm trying to be better, fix myself." He surrendered.

Josephine uttered a laugh, "You mean have self control. Look, you have some good qualities in you. There's nothing you have to do to change about yourself for someone to fall in love you." She rested her head against her hand. "Besides maturing and minimizing that ego of yours."

"I'll take that to consideration, Josephine." He cheekily winked, earning an instant glare.

Her phone vibrated on the table, revealing Bryan's name on the display screen. She rejected the call without any second thoughts. "I'll talk to him tomorrow. It's likely he'll discuss about his meetings and the convention. I'm a bit worn out after this week."

"Does that mean we can't watch The Matrix?"

"Hell no, I want to see Keanu Reeves, Evan!"

-Thought to tie a bow of this chapter with Buck and Josie. Tell me what you think so far! Hope you like it! Don't forget to comment and vote! Stay tuned!-

WRITTEN: 2/28/21

PUBLISHED: 3/1/21