Pairing : Jungwoo x Reader
Genre : Fluff, mild angst

Not requested. It's for my pleasure•~•

I want to dedicate this chapter to all the Jungwoo stans out there! _zeus-jungwoo_ , jungwooked , zeustumblade and P4rkL1n

（*＾3＾）/～♡

“In you I've found my truest and closest friend”

☆☆☆

I am not the ideal type of girl anyone dreams of. I can't be the girl who doesn't feel jealous. I try to fake my smile but want someone to read the real me. This is what I think everytime I feel envious from my very own friends, and feel more ambitious. Am I doing something wrong? Can I ever be loved due to this nature of mine. It's like I'm falling and falling and just need a hand to hold but I've got none.

"Y/N?" I hear Jungwoo as he snapped me out of my thoughts. He was my boyfriend of 6 months and we were currently in the library.

"Yes?" I say.

"I've been calling you, why did you space out? What were you thinking?" he asked looking concerned.

"N-nothing." I lied and smiled.

"You know you can tell me anything right?" he said as he took my hands into his warm ones.

I give him a reassuring smile and nod. But to be honest, I don't know... I'm scared people will judge me and grade me if I let my thoughts out loud. I know you are too good for me Jungwoo and that's why, I'm scared to lose you. You're the last person I want to hate me.

I look at the time and say, "Um Jungwoos let's call it a day."

He shrugs and we start packing up. I had to attend a school meeting held by our literary club in an hour. Jungwoo was in the music club and they had no meetings today so he was heading home. "Bye bye." he said cutely and kissed my cheek making me blush.

"Bye bye." I say but realize he has a sad pout which made him look cuter than he is. "What?" I asked.

"Shouldn't you kiss me bye too?" he asked making me chuckle awkwardly as I tuck a strand of my hair behind my ear. "Haha... Okay..." I say and lean forward to kiss his cheek but he just turns his face in the last moment causing me to peck his lips. I move away blushing like hell as he chuckles and pats my head. "See you then." he says as he goes away.

(Time Skip)

We were all seated as the President of the club came up to announce the new board members of this year. I was confident that I'll be one of the office members because of what I did. I went to inter-school competitions and won prizes for my writings and I deserved a place. The President went on announcing different posts naming different people and only one position was left. "And Hyun Soo Ah." he said and everyone clapped.

My smile faltered. I had done so much but still they did not choose me. Instead, they chose Soo Ah, a fellow classmate of mine... No. Actually, my friend too, who never did anything. She did not contribute a bit but still... Why her?

"Y/N..." my friend Lin who sat beside me spoke softly.

"Hmm?" I tried to pretend like nothing happened.

"You're not upset are you? She just got in because she's known for her beauty and all these guys drool over her. And not to mention, how influential her family is..." she said giving reasons. Absolutely right.

"Nope. I don't care and I give a damn about these stuff." I tried to laugh and faked a smile.

"Oh thank god! I thought you were upset haha." she said cheerfully.

Yes. I'm fine. I'm fine with feeling so envious of my friend. Why? Because she is prettier than me. More influential and just got the position which actually belonged to me owing to the above two facts. I hate myself for hating my own friend right now. But I cannot openly say this to anyone... Not even Lin. Because at the end of the day, she's friends with Soo Ah too. Sure, she's not best friends with us but still. I don't want anyone to judge me and think low of me.

(Jungwoo's POV)

The rest of the day, after coming back home and doing my chores I texted Y/N.

Jungwoo

Hey Jagi! What are you doing? ^^

Y/N

Hi Zeus :)
Nothing much. Just questioning my existence.

I chuckle. She's always writing texts like this making me laugh.

Jungwoo

Why jagiya~ I love you so much you don't have to ><

Y/N

I love you to the moon and back. I love you the most Jungwoo. You're the best thing life can give me.

My smile faltered a bit. Why she texting like that? Is she alright?

Jungwoo

Are you okay?

Y/N

Haha yes I am. Don't worry uwu

Then I suddenly remember. Her club was selecting new board members and she was really excited for it.

Jungwoo

Jagiya how did the meeting go? Did you get in the board ^~^

Y/N

No... I did not. But don't worry I'm actually happy that I will not have to take responsibility haha.

Then she went offline. I switched off my lights as I pulled my covers. I really hope she is saying the truth now. Why is she always keeping to herself? Why can't she even tell me? I slowly drift off to sleep.

The next day when I reach school, I get to know who were the new board members in her club. As soon as I hear Soo Ah, my eyebrows furrow. Well as far as I know, that girl never contributed anything so why...

(Your POV)

"Y/N! I was waiting for you!" said Jungwoo as soon as I got out from my class room. He was one year older to me academically.

"Oh why?" I asked trying to act as cheerful as before.

"Um... So Hyun Soo Ah became one of the board members?" he questioned. I avert my eyes as I try my best to plaster my fake smile on my face. "Yeah! But she's very happy and I'm happy for her!" I exclaimed.

His eyes softened as she he gently held my hand and pulled me towards one of the empty lockers and then stopped near them. He sighed. "You're not okay." he said suddenly.

"W-What makes you think that? I'm fit and fine!" I whine as I try to laugh.

He looked at me with a sad look. "So you think I'm not good enough to hear out your feelings?" he asks making my heart sad. I shake my head. "It's nothing Jungwoo! I swear!" I'm sorry Jungwoo, but I'm scared that if you hear me out, you'll think negative of me and leave me because I'm so bad. Yet, how come you understand me when not even my closest friend does.

"Then tell Y/N," he paused making me freeze at the intense silence. "I won't judge you."

Those words ran through my head on and on. He won't judge me?

"Y/N I love you. I really do. But you need to share your problems with me. I swear it won't change my feelings for you... Ever." he explained softly.

"I..." should I tell him? Is it a good idea? I looked up at him to see him looking at me with full focus and with affectionate eyes. I have to let it out. Somehow... It's always him who sees through my fake smile. No one else. I need to tell him. After all, this is a part of me. He needs to know me.

I take a deep breath as I speak. "I feel jealous..." I muttered as my eyes travelled down at my shoes. I didn't want to look up. "I did everything... All the work but at the end of the day, Soo Ah got everything I deserved... Because she's prettier and more influential." I speak softly as some tears escape my eyes. They weren't tears of just this but many other emotions which I've always repressed waiting for that someone to finally look through my fake smile and hold me from breaking apart. Even the smallest and pettiest of things, pile up to huger emotions. Especially when you can't express them. My shoulders shake from my crying as I feel embarrassed and angry at myself for telling him. I feel exposed and immediately feel like taking back my words. Please don't judge me Jungwoo... Please don't leave me. I've got no one but you...

Then I feel his hands travelling to my shoulders and eventually he pulls me for a warm hug. It felt like my safe haven. Where I belonged. I cry shamelessly on his chest and let it all out. From when I was young and repressed of what I deserved to this... I was letting it out all those emotions free shamelessly.

He stroked my back soothingly and patted my head. "It's okay Y/N. I told you I'll never judge you. I love you. It's alright to feel that way. Everyone does and there's nothing to be embarrassed of." he says. His soothing words making me feel more comfortable.

We part and I look up at him. He wipes my tears and smiles sweetly. "See? Doesn't it feel better after letting it all out?" he asked. He wasn't judging me.

Yes. It felt better. "Y/N always remember... No matter what the problem may be. You can always tell me if not anyone. I'll be your hand to hold."

I was dazed. Didn't know what to say except just nod.

"So next step," he says pulling me close to him and kissing my lips softly. "Is to cheer you up."

I look at him in confusion as smiles and pulls me out of the wretched gates of this school. By now we were running on the streets aimlessly as we automatically laughed as how we just slipped out without the security guard noticing at all. Then we came to stop near the ice cream parlor as he led me in.

"My treat." he said as he ordered his favorite green tea flavoured ice cream and my favourite ice cream as we ate it and enjoyed. "Thank you Jungwoo." I say feeling a lot better.

"For what?" he said as titled his head to his side. He looked as handsome as ever and his little smile danced on his perfect lips.

"For being my hand to hold."
I had finally found him with whom I could be myself without feeling ashamed even a bit. He chuckled as he put an arm around my shoulder and I chuckle back. As long as we're together, I have no problems to fear about. I found my best friend inside my lover.

A/N : Idk why I did this but I just felt like it. Thank you for reading and if you liked it drop a comment or something and vote please :)