Girl's night out was a tradition Sophie had instituted back in university. When Emily moved to Washington after law school, Sophie followed and revived the event where Mary was added to the roster. Kerri was a recent addition. Sophie recently hired the younger woman in a bid to expand her burgeoning catering business. The two had become fast friends, bonding under the pressure of cocktail parties, cranky customers, and crappy working hours.

Happy hour was in full swing as the quartet ordered a round of lavender martinis.

"Jessica and her husband just opened." Kerri was explaining her choice of location. "She's all about locally sourced ingredients and keeping a low carbon footprint."

"I like the space and the way they've married the old and new." Sophie indicated the silver steel beams butting up against the exposed brick on the wall behind Emily. Each column held shiny pots of leafy herbs. Original hardwood floors supported planter boxes separating the tables filled with different types of vegetables and flowers, giving the place a greenhouse atmosphere.

Kerri beamed at the compliment for her friend. "They even have a rooftop garden. You should see it at night. It's really romantic."

"I heard Carley Adam is a silent partner." Mary's head swivelled left and right, as if the infamous financier might appear. "Do you think he ever checks in on the owners?"

"Maybe that's him?" Mary's gaze darted in the direction Emily pointed—right at an older man who had spilled soup down the front of his shirt.

Mary slumped back in her seat. "Ha ha, Emily. There's nothing wrong with wanting to pay the man a compliment on his skills."

Emily suspected Mary admired his bank account more than his business savvy. At twenty-eight, her sister was on the hunt for a husband, but Mary wasn't interested in love. She was interested in a paycheck.

"Speaking of celebrities," Sophie turned to Emily. "Any sightings of Captain Finn?"

Emily thanked the server as he placed the thin stemmed glasses containing a pale purple liquid on the table. "He's a Petty Officer, not a Captain."

"Don't know the difference, don't care." Sophie waved a hand in the air. "Have you searched all the bases in town for him?"

"Didn't have to. He's a witness in my new case." Emily avoided her sister's heated glare.

"You're joking." Mary spat as Sophie cackled. "That's awesome."

Kerri knocked on the table, drawing the lady's attention. "Sorry, who's this?"

"Long story short, Finn's the one that got away." Sophie caught their new friend up on the backstory of the separated lovers.

"Let me get this straight. You haven't seen this man in eight years?" Kerri's face matched the awe in her voice. Emily nodded. "And you've loved him all this time?"

Emily nodded again, raising her hand to touch the silver charm hanging around her neck.

Kerri's eyes widened further, "But you've..." Her eyes scanned Emily up and down.

"She's not a nun, Kerri," Sophie interpreted her friend's expression. "There have been other men. I had high hopes for Adrian."

Adrian had been an acquaintance of Thomas, a fourth to fill out their dinner dates with Sophie and Emily. Otherwise known as a setup. According to Sophie, by the second year of university, Emily was supposed to move on. In typical Sophie style, she called Emily on her life choices, pointing out that Finn was not coming back and she had to try to move forward, find love somehow. Even if it could never be the same.

For Sophie, Emily tried. Adrian was kind and patient. He opened doors for her, insisted she walk on the inside of the street, took her side in an argument. Their first kiss was a romantic moment in the midst of a midnight ski run, airy lights swirling around them reflecting off the freshly packed snow. He'd leaned in and she let it happen. It wasn't bad, nor was it good. It was just different.

Even with the hope of moving on, it took weeks to move from tender kisses to sex. The man did everything right, from setting the mood with tiny candles strewn about the bedroom to constantly asking if Emily liked this or that as they explored each other's bodies, making sure she was okay. Adrian held her afterwards and stayed the night. In the morning, after he'd made breakfast and left, Emily stripped the sheets from her bed, pulled her comforter around her and sobbed for hours.

But she kept seeing him. They did couple-like things. Adrian spent more nights at her apartment, preferring it to the crowded dorms. Eventually, it became routine, comfortable. Everyone assumed they were in falling in love.

The school year ended, and Adrian went back to Nebraska for the summer. Like a good girlfriend, Emily drove him to the airport and kissed him goodbye. Like a good boyfriend, Adrian called to let her know he arrived safely. At first, they video-chatted every night, then every other night, then once a week. Soon they were down to random texts.

The next time Emily saw Adrian was when she bumped into him on the school campus in the fall. Embarrassment written all over his face, he'd had the decency to ask if she had time for a coffee. To talk. Amid a crowded café, Adrian officially broke up with her. He tried the "it's me, not you" line at first, but finally admitted there was a part of her he felt he could never reach. He wasn't wrong.

"Adrian was... not right for me," Emily sighed. "We just didn't click."

Mary slammed her drink on the table. "Oh, and Roy was?"

Emily's face soured at the mention of her most recent lover. "Roy was a mistake."

She met Roy at a club. College friends out celebrating the end of exams and the shots were coming in rounds Emily had lost count of. Roy slid up to her at the bar, whispering in her ear his desire to dance. Sun-drenched skin complimented his thick black hair and matching eyes, giving him a slightly dangerous look, like a bad boy any girl would ache to tame.

The sexual attraction was instant, and it wasn't long before they abandoned the dance floor for a dark corner to make out. Then she did something stupid. When Roy leaned in to kiss her, emboldened by alcohol, Emily closed her eyes and pretended it was Finn, his hands on her body. Later on, as they had sex in Roy's apartment, she let the fantasy continue.

The thing was, Roy wasn't anything like Finn. Much shorter than Finn, he was built like a truck with thick features made for the hero of an action movie, so different from her tall lanky love. His touch was nothing like Finn's, lacking any tenderness. Sex with Roy was carnal and now and again, usually when she had been drinking, it could be physically satisfying.

In the light of day, after spending a night with Roy, Emily would be racked with guilt and sadness at how she substituted him for Finn. Those moments in the dark she could pretend it was Finn were fake, like a painting of a field of flowers, there but not. The flowers flat, unscented and never lasted long enough to close the hole in her heart.

Outside the bedroom, Roy was brash, self-centered, and often rude to her friends. They disliked him and how he treated Emily, and she liked being distanced from her family. They fought often, usually as a pre-curser to make-up sex. The vicious circle escalating until one particularly bad morning. Suffering from a now typical hangover, Roy made her jump when he grabbed her from behind in the kitchen, hands gripping her hips.

"You talk in your sleep about him," Roy growled in her ear.

Emily's blood had gone cold. She didn't have to ask who Roy was talking about. Finn was a frequent visitor in her dreams.

"And when you orgasm.... and I mean a real orgasm, not your play-acting, you cry out his name." Roy hissed the "s" in his.

The wake up call knocked Emily back to reality. She never saw Roy again.

"Okay, I get the picture," Kerri interjected. "Let's forget about the past and focus on ... what's his name."

"Finn," both Sophie and Emily spoke at the same time.

"Yes, Finn. What's going on there?"

Mary snickered. "Nothing."

"And why not?" Sophie stared at Mary. "Emily at least needs closure. Or maybe this is their second chance."

Her sister crossed her arms. "He's in the army—"

"Navy." Emily's fingers traced the lines of the martini stem.

"Whatever. The point is the Navy—" she air quoted the word "—is no life for you. What are you supposed to do? Move overseas to a foreign country, live on a base while he's off gallivanting on the sea? I don't think so."

Emily's denial stuck in her throat. She'd never wanted Finn to join the Navy in the first place, had convinced him to move to New Haven with her, maybe attend a community college.

Mary pounced on Emily's hesitancy. "Besides, he's a witness in your case. Isn't dating him some kind of moral dilemma?"

A stone sank in Emily's stomach. Mary was right. Yesterday, hope had kept her awake all night, making plans to try to find Finn, attempting to see if old feelings could be reunited. As of this afternoon, having any relationship with Petty Officer Wainwright, a witness in the law firm's case, was a conflict of interest. She could be fired, disbarred, her career ruined.

All eyes turned to Emily. "Mary's right. If I were to have anything but a professional relationship with Petty Officer Wainwright, I could be fired or, worse, disbarred."

"But after the case is over?" Sophie prompted.

Emily pursed her lips. "Then we'd be... free."

"It's settled then. You keep it friendly until you win." Emily tried to suppress a grin at the girl's enthusiasm. Having only recently met Kerri, Emily was still getting used to the younger woman's overly optimistic attitude.

"If he's still around." Mary drained her glass. "He doesn't have a great track record for staying."

The reminder kicked at the hole in Emily's heart. When Finn left again, who knew when, if ever, he'd be back.