SUSPICION

"Have you seen Rhys today?" Kate dropped across from me at the picnic table. I sat in the same place as long as the weather wasn't frigid, I just didn't expect Kate would know where to find me.

"We don't have any classes together in the morning." I shook my head, willing myself to eat my leftover pizza.

"Hmmm. You look awful," she said. I blinked at her. She didn't. She looked like everyday Kate Haumann, but the closer I looked, the more I noticed her make up made up for all the signs that she'd been awake until two in the morning. Blush faked the rosiness, a messy bun disguised unwashed hair. How did she make tired look passable? 

"Thank you," I replied, putting on a tired smile for her. My morning involved staying in bed as long as possible because it was hard to get enough sleep. I was still awake and in Natalie's house past midnight and on top of that, checked the bathroom faucets for leaks twice in the short span of time between falling into bed and my alarm going off. Sleep deprivation left me bleary-eyed and squinting, only perpetuating Asian stereotypes.

"Can I fix your hair?" Kate asked, but she didn't wait for permission before she stood up and circled around, tugging my ponytail out.

"I guess..." I mumbled, officially giving up the pizza.

"What you read... was there anything else?" Kate asked, tugging at different strands of my hair, "was there anything about why... us?"

Her voice barely rose above a whisper. On the other hand, she didn't sound as hesitant as she did in the basement. Wide open space and overhead lighting helped soothe her soul. If I had any answers for her, I'd let her in on them. If I had any idea what was going on, my idea of fun wouldn't be stringing  along three other kids from school. 

"I know as much as you do," I replied.

For a moment, the tugging stopped. There was none of the tension of her hands twisting my hair into shape.

"Right. Okay." she finished, but she didn't sit down. Instead she paced around the table. "It's me after Rhys then. So, none of us will know the full story? Is that what this is?" She didn't stop moving and I wasn't altogether sure she was asking me or if she was talking to herself out loud.

She was right, wasn't she? The diary divided up by names meant different people would have different information. There wasn't anything stopping Rhys from reading the whole thing in a sitting, though. We had to rely on an honor system, no way to check that everyone did as instructed. What would happen if we didn't follow Natalie's sticky note suggestions?

"I guess not..." I said. 

What was that thing I was never supposed to do? Trust anyone in Cullfield?

Before Kate could pose another unanswerable question, her eyes perked up, letting go of the new braid in my hair. 

"Amber, hey! Did you see Cam today?"

Kate, as a different person, strutted away back into the school like nothing was wrong, like nothing happened.

˚˚˚˚˚˚

I saw Rhys one in class and it was as he stumbled in a minute or two after the bell, dropping into the chair closest to the door.

After the final bell, I waited by his rusted Nissan Datsun truck, backpack hanging off my shoulders. 

Why? Stalking him wouldn't get me information any sooner. I supposed that was what Kate tried to do at lunch, but I failed to teach her anything new. Maybe that wasn't why I was there at all, but for some other reason I couldn't put my finger on. 

"You want to go tonight?" Dean's voice came first, even and friendly.

He looked wrong walking through the parking lot next to Rhys. Dean was shorter, but more athletically built. The All-American boy did not belong next to lanky, edgy Rhys. School amplified the things the boys were just like Kate turned back into her peppy, put-together self as soon as she had someone other than me to talk to.

But I understood Kate's questionable hello earlier. Rhys looked like the undead walking and I bit my tongue to keep from pointing it out.

He rubbed his face like he was attempting to rub a little color back into his skin. I didn't know many boys who take the time to comb their hair, but his was a tangled mess that most commonly came from running fingers through it too many times.

"Why not?" Rhys replied, "entry isn't illegal so there's no need to wait around for midnight to roll around. You'll still have time to do your homework after."

Why did it sound so much like he didn't care at all about homework.

"Jane." Dean stopped first, but Rhys was the one to speak.

"When you say isn't illegal..." I began.

"You don't have any plans tonight, do you?" Rhys' smile stretched unnaturally across his face. It didn't fit into all the exhaustion in his face.

"I'll call Kate," Dean offered, "what time?"

"We'll go for eight? Tell your parents it's for a school project or something if you have to." Rhys shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

"Sure." Dean nodded, putting his phone to his ear. "Hey... Kate?" He continued through the parking lot.

I watched him for too long, up until he climbed into a Subaru Outback and there wasn't anything else to see.

"You knew this rust bucket was mine?" Rhys nudged me with his elbow, back to attention.

Well, yes. So to speak. That was a thing I noticed, but not in a way that earned his crooked grin.

"Don't feel so special. Kate's mom drives a 2006 Dodge Grand Caravan. Natalie's dad drove a 1996 Honda Accord. No sunroof." I shrugged. "It would be hard not to notice you driving around in that thing."

"It's a car thing, not a me thing?"

"You're catching on," I replied, wearing that smirk like I earned it, "you looked a little..."

For a moment, his eyes were intense again, less tired.

"Like a mess?"

"Disoriented was what i was going to say. We can use your word, though." I pursed my lips. Did he think calling himself out diminished the fact he did, in fact, look like a mess? It was a weird tactic, drawing attention to the problem as a way of skirting it. He looked like he got about as much sleep as I did. Maybe less.

Right. My face also reflected the minimal time in bed. I almost forgot about that.

"I'm fine," he insisted, like he thought I might believe him, "so, can I make this real easy for you and pick you up tonight?"

I adjusted my backpack, my fingers clutching at the straps as I realized I probably looked like a child fidgeting.

"Where are we going?" I asked. My voice did nothing for me. It still sounded unsure and nervous even when I wanted it to come out confident.

"It's a surprise," Rhys replied, "we should start looking for those long lost archives somewhere, right?"

"You think that's what this is about? Finding some old files saved from a fire?" I asked, and this time, my voice didn't sound like it came from a little girl. 

"I don't know what I think." Rhys shrugged. 

For a moment, neither of us said anything and I thought he might offer me a ride. I could walk. I was perfectly capable of walking, especially if I'd be riding in his chunk of scrap metal on wheels later.

"See you later, then," I muttered before the offer was even made.

˚˚˚˚˚˚

I sat at the kitchen island, idly wrapping my head around post-dinner homework on my dad's old work laptop. Google beckoned. School called for a little bit of research, but so did a diary that wasn't even in my current possession.

My mother prepped tomorrow's lunches by the stove, so close. Very near to be able to catch me not doing homework.

I cracked, typing into the search bar: Cullfield arson Harry Garnett Building. The results popped up.

Jonathan Kohler arrested for the crime. I clicked the link, coming up on a courtroom with a picture of a man and a young lawyer facing a woman on the witness stand. Jonathan Kohler, a local man who worked in the Harry Garnett Building found guilty of setting the building alight one evening, destroying decades of town records stored within the historical building.

Outside the house, the unmistakable rumble of Rhys' Datsun announced his arrival. Even my mother noticed, parting the curtains to crease her forehead in unwarranted concern.

I x'ed out of the window and shut the computer.

"That's my ride." I looked over her shoulder. "I won't be out too late."

That wasn't a promise I was sure I could keep, but what else was I supposed to tell my mother?

"Who's driving?" Mom continued to eye the truck.

"His name is Rhys. It's for an assignment."

"What kind of assignment?"

"History."

"This late on a school night?"

"It's extra credit. I thought... you know, I'm having trouble sleeping so it might be good to have this extra assignment to keep my grades up." I ran my fingers through my hair, giving my mother a small smile.

Her expression softened as she finally turned from the window. Hooked. She nodded sympathetically.

"I've got to go, though. That truck is single-handedly causing global warming idling out there." I gathered my bag, everything I needed already waiting by the door.

My stomach twisted itself in knots as I hopped into the truck. The tobacco smell hit me right away, mingling with oil, men's body spray, and the air freshener hanging from the rearview mirror.

"You made it out," Rhys said.

"Just drive." I inhaled sharply, glancing at him quickly before choosing to stare out the window instead.

"Straight to business it is, then." he shifted gears roughly, pulling down the street.

"I could've drove myself." I pointed out, watching the rows of houses out the window. Between stately old homes, the odd newer contemporary house fought it's way in. Did some of the original buildings get torn down? Burn down?

"So there's a reason you let me give you a ride?" Rhys pressed.

I supposed so, but I couldn't tell him exactly what that reason might be. It might have been the possibility of some leak of truth, an insight without Kate or Dean to overhear.

"You didn't make an Asian joke. I'm proud of you," I replied, glancing back at him, waiting for that dangerous smirk. I wanted him to tell me something I didn't already know. I wanted a story about how he did know Natalie and there was a proper explanation for why he and I and Kate and Dean were shoved together.

"You're funnier out of class."

"I just want to finish high school and get out of this town."

"Everyone says that. Everyone says they can't wait to get out of Cullfield. And everyone always come back." Rhys adjusted his rear view mirror. "I think you have a chance, though. You haven't been here long enough."

The vagueness I wasn't looking for ends as he parks on the street in the north end of town, a few blocks away from Town Hall and the public library.

Dean's Subaru was already parked on the other side of the street, Kate and Dean on the sidewalk. Already, Kate crossed her arms.

"Oh no..."

Kate noticed the truck almost immediately, storming across the street without consideration for traffic at all. Lucky for her Cullfield was not exactly a bustling metropolis at that time of day. It wasn't exactly a bustling metropolis during rush hour, either. Dean jogged behind her, at least looking both ways first.

"Do you think this is funny?" Kate demanded before Rhys could even slam his door shut.

I jumped out, circling around the truck. I'd bet Kate could take him. In heeled boots and a leather jacket, she looked like a girl who could surprise him with self-defense moves.

"What?" I asked, scanning faces to decide whether or not I actually wanted to know the answer.

"They didn't tell you either? We're going on a ghost hunt!" Kate raged, outright smacking Rhys in the shoulder. She might've slapped him across the face if he was easier to reach. 

Across the street stood a bricked building, windows lining the front, the fire escape zigzagging up the side. Honestly, it looked no different from the other historical buildings scattered through Cullfield. The Greyview Inn almost looked like a functional hotel from the truck.

"Are we actually?" I asked, scanning those rows and rows of windows.

No. Bad idea. The last thing I needed to do was work myself up before even entering the building.

"Look, here's the thing. Natalie was looking for something and if there is anywhere to find out about places Cullfield historically kept secrets, it's the Greyview. All we do is take a tour, maybe ditch the tour and look around, we leave, and I give you the book and you can figure out what to do with it next. Okay?" Rhys shoved his hands into his pockets.

"Are all of these places going to be haunted?" Kate asked incredulously.

"They're just stories," Dean said, "Cullfield claims any house more than twenty years old is haunted."

I glanced quickly at the windows before rubbing my arms. For some reason, Dean's tone wasn't all that comforting.

"We're following directions from a girl who predicted a fire and you're telling me they're just stories? Don't feed me your skeptic bullshit trying to make me feel better," Kate snapped.

Part of me wanted to tell her to keep it down, like someone might overhear us. What would anyone do? Who would be worried about this conversation, especially outside a hotel dedicated to ghost tours?

"Let's get it over with," I said, crossing the empty road to the Greyview Inn, leaving the others to make up their minds and follow or linger outside.