you guys are fucking crazy. i get at least 3k reads added to this book per day. so as a thank you, group chat.

L: we should totally hang out again. seriously. i'm positive my fans would love to meet you.

H: how many fans do you even have lou? ten?

L: *picture of twitter home screen* try ten million.

N: you're like a celebrity?

L: us bloggers and youtubers are like that, but the difference is we brought up our own fame. we didn't get managed or anything. we posted something and people liked it.

L: but anyway

H: what

L: harry, did niall ever tell you what 'ns' at the end of his letters meant?

H: no...what does it mean? ive been wondering.

N: louis tomlinson I swear to god...

H: lou tell me don't listen to him.

H: no offence babe

N: shut up

L: niall. styles. *sobs for 2928291038282 centuries*

H: awwwwwwww niall babe, that's cute 😘😘😍😘😍😘😍😘😝

N: nooo stop don't text me.

N: but thanks for kissing me.

H: i couldn't help myself, you're sitting right next to me.

L: was it hot niall. this is important.

N: it was hot in all ways don't worry louis tomlinperv.

N: and harry, why didn't you tell me about you and lou? when you all were 14?

H: huh, it kind of slipped. did bigmouth tell you?

N: yeah.

L: i am not a big mouth sir.

L: i am a fabulous mouth

N: 😳

H: no niall has a fabulous mouth.

L: how do you know?

H: i'm the only one who has gotten his blowjobs.

N: *blowjob. i only gave you one. you're obsessed.

H: i'm waiting for two...

N: harry not in front of louis.

L: guys i write gay smut all the time really this is child's play. where's the bondage and whips? that's where the action is at.

H: LOUIS 😷😷😷😷😷

N: oH MY GOD 😦

L: what? it is! read it sometime!

H: louis you would watch a gay sex tape wouldn't you.

L: if you guys wanna send me one for judging go ahead, i mean, idk if i would enjoy it but...😊

N: louis. this relationship is being taken slowly.

H: yeah seriously if you want a sex tape make one.

L: with my michael cardboard cutout?

H: him or luke idk and i don't care. make it a threesome for god's sake why not?

N: babe don't give him ideas! 😂

L: oh...this shall be fun 😏😏😏😏

H: hold on i'll be right back, someone is at the door.

L: niall would you want my sex tape?

N: louis that is not a question to ask me 😐

L: 🙈