(Video above isn't mine)

In my generation, kids always talk about lgbtqa+, and boyfriends and girlfriends.

It all started in [insert grade here] and that's where all the girls started talking about boys and rarely the boys would do the same. Me, being in a friend group with other girls, didn't have a crush. Truth or dare, whatever you would have to say who you liked: I didn't have any names to say. Since I was still a bit young though, I was kinda in what people would call the: "Ew, gross, why would I kiss a boy?" So no one would really get entertainment from me.

This 'stage' though lasted for quite some time until [insert grade here]. I started spending time with... let's call her: Dark sunset (cause her hair top was dark and it faded into a yellowish/orange at the bottom, plus she used to be depressed but now she's actually quite positive). Now when I say 'I was spending time with her a lot', I mean I was spending time with her constantly. Kids around me had also started talking about lgbtqa+ around this time, some girls also got together (but notice how I only say girls.) So I noticed, and I started to wonder: 'Could I be lesbian?'

I decided to go along, saying that I was. All of a sudden I had decided that. Now, around the time I also was spending time with a guy: let's call him.... Frienemy asshat, or FA for short! :D (Why I'm calling that is because he always insulted me, but he always thought we were still friends after: and I never got the courage to tell him that he was being a bit rude.) A girl named... let's call her Drama Queen: noticed and told me that I liked him.

I said no, and basically drew letters in the air: 'I ' m  g a y ' Drama Queen, told Frenemy asshat. That was that, and I continued to walk around with Dark sunset on the track. I started thinking the possibility that this was because I liked her. I decided to tell my other friend: Chloe (that's not her name, but ye-) and Chloe admitted that she felt the same about Dark sunset.

(Now, mind you, I actually didn't have a crush on Dark sunset, I thought I did because I always got jealous when she was with others, and I was always with her..)

Chloe had the same bus route as Dark sunset,  so we both decided to write a note (like weirdos), and Chloe could bring it to Dark sunset. Chloe did so, and the next day... was a whirlwind of emotions. Let's just say that a friend of Dark sunset's chose between me and Chloe, and chose Chloe. To be honest, I didn't really care... Until Dark sunset asked if she could come over and spend the night.

I said sure, because for one: Kids normally never even came over except my cousins, and for two: because I wasn't really having anyone over that night. So she came over, and admitted that she actually wanted her friend to chose me over Chloe. I didn't really know what to say,  all of a sudden she broke up with Chloe and whatnot: soon after that becoming my girlfriend. So we 'dated' for a while.

A time came though, where we kinda decided to take a break from each other. I still 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 that I liked her though, but I noticed how I didn't really care anymore :/. I decided to tell her that I still liked her anyway, but apparently during the time she liked another guy.  𝑫𝒊𝒅𝒏'𝒕 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒍. I didn't want to accept the fact that I didn't care though, and tried to replace some loneliness in front of it (Which I did halfly feel).

Me and Dark sunset then  decided to be just friends. :D

But oooohhhh noooo, more confusion had to come my way....