Sherlock went to his room and sat down on his bed.

How had he been so blind. Twice now. What was it about Phoebe that he just missed everything about her? It wasn't like he just didn't pay attention to her, so what was it?

What was he supposed to say to her?

What was he supposed to do with this information?

He couldn't be in a relationship. That was absurd! Regardless of how capable Phoebe was, a relationship would only slow him down.

And he told her to get over herself. Maybe He could help her with that.

He could do everything in his power to make her stop loving him.

-

The next morning, Phoebe made breakfast but Sherlock refused to eat it which she chalked up to being normal.

"So, are we going on that case now or later?" Phoebe asked as she walked over to Sherlock as he sat in his chair on his phone.

"I don't think you should go. I'll take John instead," Sherlock said, not looking up at her.

"Oh," Phoebe said as she slumped a bit. "Yeah, okay. I'll, um, stay here. Have fun."

She felt a sting in her hear as she turned and walked away from Sherlock to go down to her flat.

"That was weird."

It continued like this for days.

She would ask if the boys wanted help on a case, only to be turned down, Sherlock didn't want any of her food, and he seemed to be avoiding her.

She had no idea what she had done, but she was just hoping that maybe Sherlock was going through something. The thing that came to mind was that maybe he was upset about not seeing Irene lately.

She went up one day and saw the boys getting ready to leave.

"Do you guys need me to come with you at all?" Phoebe asked as she looked between the two.

"Why would we need you? Do you think we aren't capable?" Sherlock snapped which made Phoebe freeze.

"I didn't-"

"Sherlock?" John looked at him in disbelief.

"We are perfectly able to deal with a case on our own. We were doing it on our own for a while before you decided to move in. We don't need you tagging along at all. Just go back downstairs and do whatever it is you do all day," Sherlock said sharply and tears filled Phoebe's eyes, but she took a breath. "I told you before, or did you forget. I don't need you. I don't care about you."

Before John could even blink, the sound of skin on skin rang through the air. Phoebe glared at Sherlock as she smacked him across the face before storming out of the room.

"What the hell was that for?!" John cried out as he glared at Sherlock.

"She'll get over herself. Now let's go," Sherlock said, going towards the door to leave.

"Go and apologize to her right now," John said coldly.

"What?"

"Tell her you didn't mean it. Tell her that you were just upset or something but so help me GOD! If you don't apologize, I will beat your ass! I will never forgive you if you if you do not fix this!" John shouted and Sherlock stood there in shock.

"Why should I? It'll make her stop loving me, won't it?" Sherlock replied simply.

"That's not what you do, Sherlock! You don't make someone hate you! She cares more about what you think than anyone else! You saying that won't make her just stop loving you! You are going to crush her spirit! You are horrible person! Now go apologize!" John marched himself upstairs, not giving Sherlock a second look.

Sherlock sighed and went downstairs, knocking on Phoebe's door.

"Go away!"

He could hear the crack in her voice even though she was attempting to sound strong.

He sighed and pulled out his kit, using his pick, he opened her door. He walked into her flat, trying to find her. He went to her bathroom and found her curled up in the tub, sobs racking her body.

"Phoebe?"

"Get out!" She glared at him as she threw a shampoo bottle at him.

"Can you just calm down?" Sherlock said, dodging the conditioner that followed. "Really?"

"Fuck off!"

"Can you just listen?" Sherlock looked at her as she continued to throw shower items at him.

"Why would I listen to you? You don't care what I have to say so I don't care what you have to say," Phoebe shot at him with a harsh glare, standing up in the tub before stepping out.

"Will you just calm down for two seconds?" Sherlock breathed, trying to keep his cool as she stared him down.

"Why should I? You are just a no good, sociopathic, stupid-"

Sherlock leaned down and pressed his lips onto hers.

Phoebe froze before quickly pushing him back. "What the hell?!"

"I do care about you. More than you know. I want to know why you didn't tell me?" Sherlock said as he held her arms, keeping her in place.

"What are you talking about?" Phoebe questioned as he walked over to her.

"Why didn't you tell me that I was the one that was hurting you before? That I was the one you were in love with."

"I don't know what you mean," Phoebe played dumb and Sherlock persisted.

"Why didn't you tell me that you love me?"

"Because you don't love me back and you never will..." Phoebe whimpered. "You said it yourself... you could never fall in love with someone like me... you love Irene Adler... and you don't care about me. You never have. You can't lie to me now and think it changes anything."

"I do not love her." Sherlock looked down into her chocolatey eyes.

"What do you mean? It was obvious," Phoebe said.

"Too obvious. Exactly. That was the plan," Sherlock said with a grin.

"So you don't have feelings for her?" Phoebe inquired as she looked up at him.

"Of course not. You know that I'm not one for sentiment," Sherlock said and she nodded.

"I know..." Phoebe said softly as she looked down.

"But I didn't mean what I said earlier. I do care about you. I just don't want you to be in love with me," Sherlock said and she bit her lip.

"And you think I want to be?" Phoebe said as she looked up at him, trying not to start crying again. "Do you have any idea how much it hurts to fall in love with someone who you know will never love you back no matter how hard you try? No matter how much you like to believe that it's possible?"

Sherlock sighed as he rubbed her arm gently. "I can't say that I do."

"Believe me, Sherlock, if I could just make my feelings go away, I would. But like I said before. It's not that easy," Phoebe said before looking to the side, finding it hard to keep eye contact with him while keeping her composure. "If it makes you uncomfortable, I'll stay away. I'll try to find someone else who might want me."

Sherlock found that he didn't like that answer. He stayed silent for a moment and looked at the ground. He found the thought of Phoebe holding feelings for anyone else abhorrent to him. "It doesn't make me uncomfortable. I do believe I may hold a deep regard for you, Phoebe."

"Don't."

"Don't what?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Don't get my hopes up. I know that you believe sentiment is a chemical defect in the losing side," Phoebe said, her eyes brimming with the tears she was desperately trying to hold back.

"Hmm, so I have heard," Sherlock murmured. "But I don't find myself liking the idea of you being with anyone else."

"Well then what do you want me to do? I want to happy, Sherlock! Want someone to love me they way I love them! I think I deserve happiness!"

"Then I'll try to give you that happiness," he replied as he caressed her cheek gently.

"Wha-"

She felt his lips on hers once again, but quickly kissed him back this time.

She was so lost in the moment, not thinking about what would happen. The kiss was fast and heated as Sherlock's hands went to Phoebe's hips.

Sherlock pulled her close and closed his eyes as he let himself melt into the feeling. He would never not enjoy the feeling of her lips against his.

He put a hand on the back of her head. and let their lips meld together with passion. This was something he didn't never realized he wanted. He could picture himself kissing her every day.

Phoebe smiled in the kiss but she pushed him away after a minute, panting softly.

"Sherlock..." She looked down and he frowned.

"Isn't this what you wanted?" Sherlock looked at her in confusion.

"I... no... I know you can't love me, but that's what I really want..." Phoebe murmured and he gently made her look at him. "More than anything, I just... I want to matter to you... I want you to think I can do anything."

"Let me try. I'm not promising anything, but just let me try. I would be lying if I said that I feel nothing for you. Phoebe, you make me so confused. I've never experienced this before and it's something I don't understand, but I would like to understand it," Sherlock said as he looked into her beautiful brown eyes. "You know that I think love is pointless, but I'm willing to give it a shot."

"Okay," Phoebe murmured and Sherlock kissed her again, gently this time.

Phoebe wrapped her arms around his neck as she kissed him back, her smile returning as she enjoyed the feeling of his soft lips against hers.

He took her over to her bed in her room after leading her out of the bathroom. He lifted her up, setting her on the bed, slowly guiding her so she was lying down.

She pressed herself close to him as he ran a hand through her hair.

Sherlock broke the kiss and began pressing kisses to her neck, enjoying the feeling of her running her hands through his curls. A moan left her lips and he quickly pulled her shirt up over her head.

He took a moment to look at her face, noting her slightly swollen lips and her flushed cheeks.

"You gonna leave this time?" She asked softly as she looked up into his eyes.

"I won't leave. I promise," Sherlock whispered as he moved her hair out of her face before connecting his lips with hers once again.

🔎

Phoebe woke up and realized that she was in someone's arms. She looked to see that she was snuggled up with Sherlock.

"Morning," Sherlock said as he gently trailed his fingers through her long brown hair. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah," Phoebe replied with a small smile. She sat up and Sherlock did the same.

She leaned over and kissed his lips gently. He smiled a tiny bit as he kissed back.

Sherlock didn't exactly know what he was feeling and it was strange, but he enjoyed it.

He wrapped his arm around her waist as he pulled her over him. He broke the kiss and brushed her hair behind her ear. "I enjoyed last night."

"I'm glad, but I do worry if people like Moriarty were to find out," Phoebe said as she relaxed, letting herself lay on his chest. She enjoyed feeling the steady rise and fall of his chest.

Sherlock hummed and ran his fingers through her hair. He didn't want to move. He wanted to stay with her like this all morning, but he knew there were cases to take care of. After a few minutes he gently made her look at him.

Phoebe just smiled and sat up as she moved off of him. "I think it we should probably get ready for the day."

Sherlock stood up and pulled his clothes onto his body.

"My clever boy," she murmured before getting up and walking over to her dresser so she could get dressed. "So, any new cases?" She asked as she slipped on some clothes.

"No, not yet. I haven't spoken to John yet. I made you a promise. I said I wouldn't leave. Here I am. Though yhere is the case from yesterday that we never went to," Sherlock said and Phoebe could tell he wanted to go on a case.

"Go on," Phoebe waved him off.

"What? Really?" Sherlock looked at her unsurely.

"Go talk to John and find a case. I'll be up soon," Phoebe said as she brushed her hair.

"Thank you!" Sherlock turned to leave before looking back.

He walked over and pressed a gentle kiss to Phoebe's forehead before he dashed upstairs.

🔎

"Anything new?" Phoebe asked as she walked into the flat above her own.

"Nope, not yet," Sherlock said and John looked up from the paper.

"He thinks everything is boring. Nothing new." John said to Phoebe and she looked at Sherlock.

"I'm sure you'll find something," she said as she walked into the kitchen.

"Hopefully," Sherlock grumbled. "Haven't had anything in a few days."

Phoebe opened the fridge. "Sherlock! If you are gonna put body parts in the fridge, don't put them on the food!"

"But-"

"No buts!" Phoebe pulled out what she needed. "I'm getting you a mini fridge, I swear. Do you guys not have milk?"

"Nope!" Sherlock said as he looked online for a case.

"I'll go get mine," Phoebe replied before going to her flat.

"Did you talk to her at all?" John looked at Sherlock.

"What?" He looked up for a second before looking back at the laptop.

"Did you talk to Phoebe about what I said the other night? She doesn't seem upset in the slightest," John clarified. "I thought maybe she was just putting on an act, but she seems genuinely okay.

"Oh, yes. We are friends. We are both okay," Sherlock answered.

"So you aren't-"

"John, I don't do sentiment. You should know this by now," Sherlock cut him off.

"So you're still just friends? She's not upset by that?" John raised an eyebrow.

"She seemed a little upset by it, but she told me that she was trying to find someone else," Sherlock replied and John hummed.

"Get one yet?" Phoebe asked as she walked in with the stuff she needed that they didn't have.

"Nothing," Sherlock replied, but he didn't seem too agitated about it.

Phoebe smiled as she began to cook, thinking about where they were going to go from her.

🔎

A few days had passed and Sherlock had been acting strange.

"Are you feeling okay, Sherlock?" John asked with concern. "Normally you're bouncing all over and shooting walls when you don't have a case."

"I would think I'm fine, but you're the doctor," Sherlock said as he looked at John.

He walked over and put a hand on Sherlock's forehead.

"You're a little warm and you seem a bit flushed. You just need some sleep. Lie down on the couch. I'll have Phoebe get you tea and I'll find a case for you for when you are feeling better," John said and Sherlock nodded, going over without an argument.

John raised an eyebrow and went to see Phoebe in the kitchen.

"Something is wrong with Sherlock," John said and Phoebe looked at him.

"What do you mean?" She asked with concern.

"He seems so relaxed and not like himself. He isn't throwing a fit over not having a case. His face is flushed and he's a bit warm but he doesn't have a fever. He also didn't argue with me when I told him to lie on the couch," John explained and Phoebe hummed.

"He may just be under the weather. People do act a bit different when they're sick," Phoebe said. "You should know that, Doctor."

"Yes, but not Sherlock. He gets worse when he's sick because he's bored," John said as he poured some tea from the kettle that Phoebe had brewed.

"I'm sure Sherlock is fine," Phoebe assured. "I probably just passed whatever abug I had to him. He has a really strong immune system, but it's not invincible."

"Maybe you're right..." John hummed and took the tea out to Sherlock but he wasn't on the couch anymore. "Sherlock?" He looked around the flat and found Sherlock sitting in bed.

"I'm sick. Give me my tea and take care of me," he said as he stayed wrapped up in his blankets.

"Here's your tea. Do you want anything else?" John asked as he gave the sociopath his tea.

"Brownies," Sherlock said immediately. "And I want to see Phoebe."

"Alright, I'll send her in once she's done with breakfast."

"Oo, I would like some breakfast as well," Sherlock requested.

"Got it," John replied before walking out of the room, closing the door behind him.

🔎

Phoebe opened the door and walked into the room before shutting the door with her foot.

"John said you wanted to see me," she said softly as she made her way over to his bed and set the plate with his breakfast on the table beside his bed.

"Did you bring me brownies?" Sherlock looked at her expectantly.

"They are baking right now. I brought you breakfast," she said as she sat down on the side of his bed.

"Wonderful," Sherlock replied as he took the plate off his nightstand and sat up, starting to eat right away.

"So, why did you want to see me?" She asked as she looked at him.

"I was thinking about something you said quite some time ago. You told me that you loved someone but they loved someone they couldn't have. Now that I know you were talking about me, you must have been referring to The Woman as at that point we thought she was dead so I wouldn't be able to have her as you said. However, I am quite curious as to who the other was," Sherlock said as he looked at her.

"You remember all that?"

"Of course I remember. You said that there was a better option before you who loves me. I wish to know who," Sherlock said.

"Molly... she's the perfect choice for you... she's much better than I in so many ways," Phoebe answered as she looked down.

"I don't think so. Molly may be very smart but she isn't as observant as you. She always is so awkward and acts strange while you have confidence. You don't let your emotions affect your work. I always thought that caring was a weakness, but I now know that it is only a weakness if you let it show."

"I... I try my best to save my tears for the pillow. My dance teacher use to always say that," Phoebe said softly as she looked at her feet dangling over the side of his bed.

"Well it does impress me that you don't let it show unless you want it to show, most of the time." Sherlock put his breakfast down and took her hand gently. "I'd say recently though you've been a bit more emotional.

"I wonder whose fault that is." Phoebe looked at their hands and then looked up at him, seeing his grimace.

"I may not know how to love so I will not lie and say that I love you back," Sherlock started, watching their hands as he laced his fingers with hers while continuing, "but I do know that you are special. You make me feel the same way I feel when I get a case that is a ten. It's an amazing feeling and I don't understand it, but I would like to."

"I understand," Phoebe said softly as she smiled.

"I don't want you to be in danger though," Sherlock added as he looked into her eyes. "Moriarty targeted you before because he knew that it would get to me."

"So we can keep this between us. I'm perfectly fine with us not talking about this until you're ready," Phoebe said as she went to pull her hand away but Sherlock kept his grip on her hand and nodded.

"I'm sorry that this isn't exactly what you wanted, but I at least want to try slowly. I truly don't know what I feel and you know I hate not knowing," Sherlock said and she nodded.

"I can try to help you understand," Phoebe put her free hand on his cheek gently and he couldn't help but lean into her gentle touch. "Now, eat your breakfast and get some rest."

She stood up and walked towards the door.

"You have to get better before we let you take a new case. I love you, clever boy."