Shoto didn't want to talk when Shine followed him, but she wasn't taking no for an answer.

"Even if you don't talk to me...I don't want to leave you alone," she said.

"I'm fine," Shoto said.

"Stop lying to me," Shine said, "You're not fine..."

Shoto didn't talk for a very long time. Minutes ticked by awkwardly.

"I was a bad hero," he said at last, "That's all it is."

"And that this keeps happening, and that people you care about are in danger," Shine added, "Shoto...this is the same for me, you know... Well, no it's not. We take things differently...but I at least know what happened. It was because of me, after all."

Shoto looked up. "No, I think it was because of me. I was singled out."

Shine had never dreamed he'd take it that way. "What do you mean? Explain."

Shoto told her what had been said. Shine was surprised. "I didn't know that."

"Did they want to get to me...? To my dad...? I just don't get it," Shoto said, "It's so frustrating."

Shine sat down--they were both sitting on the floor now.

"Listen...what happened was to get to me, not you. They told me that."

"What? Why would they want to get to you?"

"I have powerful enemies, I guess," Shine said, "I attract them... The point is, it's not your fault. I'm sorry you got dragged into it. I wanted to avoid that one thing, and I couldn't... You're not the only one who doesn't always get what they want."

Shoto looked up at her oddly. "I don't think it's your fault."

"It's as much mine as yours," Shine said, "No, it's more..."

"Do you think you're still in danger?" Shoto said.

Shine could not in any honesty answer that in a good way.

"I guess all of us are still, since they are still at large. But that's nothing new."

"I wish we could just stop them... Couldn't you? You've met them... I mean, you said you can't, but you could let us do it."

"I wouldn't do that," Shine said quickly, "I wouldn't endanger you."

"It's more danger to not let us. To let them go!" Shoto said.

Shine took a moment to keep her composure...then, she looked right at him and, very clearly, she said, "Shoto, nothing you can do to them will undo what happened. You can't wind back time."

Shoto stared at her with a very fragile look. "That's...not what I mean."

"You want to make up for what happened," Shine said, "but you can't... Neither can I. We can't undo it. You live your whole life playing catch up, then it's soul killing. If you let yourself just be upset, on the other hand, you could think clearly."

"I am thinking clearly," Shoto said, "I'm tired of being helpless."

Shine paused, then she chuckled. "We are all helpless."

Shoto frowned. "What? What is that supposed to mean? You're giving up."

"No, but listening to you, I realize I'm just like you are. I'm trying to figure it out...and I can't." Shine laughed again. "I'm still foolish. There is nothing we can really do to prevent bad things from happening, you know... It's enough to do what we can in the moment-- and prevent what we can."

"That's not enough," Shoto said.

"I can't talk you out of that," Shine said, "And this is not helping either of us. What can I do to help?"

Shoto shook his head. "I'm not asking for help."

"You're about ready to cry," Shine said bluntly, "I want to help."

The effect of this took a few moments to sink in. Shoto at first thought she was being annoying--then he started sniffling without realizing he was going to, and then it was full on weeping.

How embarrassing.

"I'm sorry," he began saying, "So sorry..."

Shine scooted closer and handed him some tissue... Where had she gotten those?

"Let it out," Shine said quietly.

That went on for a while. At some point, Momo looked in-- and then was going to back out, but Shine nodded at her. Momo didn't think Shoto would like her coming in, but he looked up and didn't say anything... He was kind of at that low place emotionally where being surprised takes too much energy.

Finally Momo just came in and sat down. Shoto had stopped crying by then. He was just staring at the floor.

"I didn't think I was upset," he said.

Shine didn't laugh for once. "I know."

"Is it always like that...? You think you're fine, and then...something just...sets it off..." Shoto remembered the Sports Festival being the same.

"For some of us..." Shine said.

"I...don't like that," Shoto said.

Shine did chuckle then. "Yeah...I don't blame you."

"Are you all right now?" Momo asked gently, "Do you want anything? Tea, maybe?"

"No thanks," Shoto said lowly.

"Would it be too much if I hugged you?" Shine asked.

Shoto supposed if All Might could, Shine could.

There was no real reason not to. "No, I guess not."

But he wasn't prepared for what her hugging him brought to mind. Maybe because she was a girl, but it reminded him exactly of his mom. Women just hug differently anyway. He almost choked up again.

Momo didn't move to join in, but she smiled a little.

Shine didn't draw it out. She pulled back. "It's sometimes easier, you know, to not say anything."

"How did you know that would happen?" Shoto asked.

"I know you...and personal experience...but why does it matter?"

"I just feel like I'm predictable..." Shoto said.

"You are," Shine said, "but that's not always bad. It's just how you are. Nothing wrong with it. Makes it easier for us, actually. No games."

"Yeah, it's not bad," Momo agreed.

Shoto swallowed. "Uh...thanks..."

"You're just too adorable," Shine kind of stepped on the moment by saying.

"Shine!" Shoto said, in about as embarrassed a voice as any 16 year old could have.

Momo choked on a sudden urge to laugh at the look on his face.

"Sorry, sorry, I didn't mean that to be bad." Shine held up her hands. "I just like kids."

"I'm not a kid!"

"You are to me... You're younger than my baby sister, and I still call her that. Don't take it so personally."

"It's still kind of degrading, isn't it? If you don't like being called old, why would you call me a kid?"

"Because kid is more flexible a term than old..."

Shine and Shoto continued the argument for at least three minutes, while Momo suppressed laughter at how ridiculous it was.

But it broke the tension and heaviness in the air.

Finally, Shine ended it by saying it wasn't worth arguing about anymore.

"I'm glad you feel better at least. Momo, what about you?"

"I've been doing better since my friends talked to me," Momo said, "I mean...I don't know. I used to think none of this bothered me, but I'm not so sure anymore."

"Yeah, that's sums up my experience of going to therapy..." Shine said dryly, "Look, you two don't have to bottle it all up. I know the school pushes that always-smile crap. I guess you can't have a melt down in class, but you can have one around me and Wally. It's normal to us."

"I don't think I want to." Shoto didn't realize that sounded rude. "I don't like this. I prefer to just move forward. I don't know how you and Midoriya both made me do that...but it's not pleasant."

"Both of us just said the truth, and if that's enough, then...well...that's good," Shine said, "And I don't want you to just move forward. That brushes aside the things we can learn from the experience that we will only learn if we stay present to it a little longer... I shouldn't talk though. I used to push pain aside too... Survival mode... Wally tells me now to slow down. Funny, huh? That's why I'm telling you. I think I got so much stronger since I started letting things sink in...not dwelling in it, but going through it."

"You make it sound easy," Momo said, "but it's just a lot of wondering why what happened, happened, and I don't like feeling so...scared all the time." She put her head on her knees.

Shine nodded. "I know."

"Then, what's the alternative?" Shoto said, "Being afraid is not something we can afford as heroes."

"Oh, that's nonsense. Heroes are afraid all the time," Shine said, "If they aren't, they're idiots or overconfident. What you need to understand is that fear and panic are two different things. Fear and phobia are also different. A phobia is a fear you can't control. It controls you. Panic is fear when it's given free rein...but Fear alone is not such a bad thing. It's a normal feeling. Even our God has felt fear, when He was human...so much so, he sweat blood. That's a very chronic form of anxiety. Hardly anyone experiences it."

"That's horrible," Momo said.

"Yes...but he overcame it," Shine said, "Not by might, as you would think. But by choosing to accept what was happening as God's will... Not that every awful thing is God's will, but some things that happen we cannot get out of. I've had to accept that. Your brand of courage is based off escaping. Pushing aside what happened is running from it-- it's based on fear. I guess I do try to do that too, but I know better."

She traced her hand over the padding on Todoroki's floor. "Wally and I help each other. We both have areas we are afraid in, and we remind each other to accept that. Our love helps us face it. Perfect Love casts out fear. Anyone who fears is not perfect in love. [1 John 4:18] If you want to be strong, you have to love more, not less. That means taking the time to have compassion on other people. Or you'll treat them how you treat yourself... If you can't let yourself be weak at times, then you will demand everyone around you never be weak, and that makes men into monsters."

Shoto shivered.

"Are you saying that you think the LOV attacking us was God's will?" Momo found that hard to swallow.

"I don't think all of it was," Shine said, "but I'm not privy to His counsel. That's why we call it Faith... But, kids, at the end of the day, none of us are certain of anything, faith or no faith. But with faith, you can have peace even if you don't know. Without it, there is no peace. To me it's clear which is better... But who knows? Some good may come out of what happened yet... I don't see how...but...that's me."

She was thinking of Dabi's warning. She saw no good in that...but she knew her own words were ones she should be listening to. Whether she felt like it or not. Shine had the ability to see that, while the kids mostly only thought their own advice applied to other people and would be much harder on themselves because of it. It was what they were taught.

And they didn't see what she meant very well because of that, but at least she was soothing to listen to. They felt like they could draw strength just from how she put the matter. It didn't seem so huge and overwhelming now.

"How can you be satisfied with that, though?" Shoto said, "Not knowing. I'd never want that."

"Because I know I have no choice in the matter," Shine said, "I will never know everything, but I can choose whether I'm bitter about that, or whether I have faith... I tried being bitter for a while. Sucked the joy out of everything. I'm done with it. What you want, though, is for you to decide. Trouble won't stop for you once you become a hero though. Wouldn't it be nice to have
something else to fall back on other than yourself?"

"It sounds nice, but I don't know if I could accept that," Momo said slowly, "I think...we'd have no reason to improve, then."

Shine shrugged. "I haven't lost my motivation to improve, nor do I think I will lose it. It's easier this way. I can improve without feeling like everything is doomed if I don't...but if you want it your way...well, you'll get it...and all that goes with it. Let's not argue."

That still sounded foreboding.

"Are you okay? You seemed upset earlier," Momo changed the subject.

"I'm not okay," Shine admitted roundly, "but it's something I can't discuss yet. Wally and I need to talk more."

"Did my dad bully you?" Shoto asked angrily.

"No, it's nothing to do with that," Shine said.

"Did the teachers scold you?" Momo asked.

"No. Don't worry about it." Shine got up. "I should see if Bakugo is okay."

Shoto remembered now that Bakugo had been pretty harsh to him. "Why is he so angry at me...? I mean, I know I screwed up, but...he's not usually so...direct..."

Shine looked over her shoulder. "He's mad at everything. You're just the face he put on it. Try to forgive him for now. He'll regret it eventually. Bakugo is the type of guy who can't deal with feeling bad about anything except by being angry. It's never been okay for him to be anything but angry. We have to be patient with him. It's like learning to walk for him to learn to express things any other way."

"How do you now he's not just angry though?" Momo said.

Shine smiled wryly. "That's the wrong kind of question, Momo. The thing to ask is, what is he angry for so that he won't be something else? Good night." She shut the door.

Momo and Shoto looked at each other.

"Maybe we do need to be patient with him," Momo said, "I've never seen him like this."

"He always takes things out the worst possible way, if that's what he's doing" Shoto grumbled, "But...I guess I'm not one to talk."

"Maybe he didn't mean what he said. I'm starting to think Bakugo isn't as harsh as we think, just...really...difficult to understand," Momo said.

Shoto didn't know about that, but he didn't argue. "Why'd you come in here?"

"Oh...I shouldn't have, huh? I knew it...but Mr. West said I should check on you guys... I guess he thought Shine might be too upset. But she seems okay, but I didn't want to just walk out because I thought that would be weird..." Momo sputtered.

"It's okay. I'm not mad. I was just wondering."

"Oh..." Momo brushed her hair back.

Shoto caught himself staring at it and shook himself a little.

"Were you still upset?"

"I'm better than I was," Momo admitted, "It's a lot of things... And you?"

"I...don't know. I guess it's better," Shoto said.

Momo looked around. "Well, I should probably go do homework, before someone starts looking for us..."

"Right..." Shoto said.

Though why she was worried about that, he didn't understand.

Momo left. She hoped no one saw her.

"What were you doing in there?" Mina asked.

Momo jumped. "Oh...uh...asking about something, that's all."

"Really? What?"

"Just about...class," Momo lied. But how could she tell her the truth...? She felt guilty though.

"Wow..." Mina said.

"Well...actually, it's because of what happened," Momo confessed, red faced.

"Oh..." Mina said, "I gotcha... Gee, is he okay?"

"A little better."

"That a relief... You want to study, then?"

"Yes, we should."

* * *

Wally didn't know how to talk to Bakugo. The kid would just glare at him or mutter an insult.

How Shine strung all that together into some kind of code she could understand was beyond Wally.

Bakugo blew up some shrubs and grass though. So he was doing what she suggested to the other kids.

"If you actually talked about it, you know, maybe you'd feel less angry..." Wally tried again.

"Flip off!" Bakugo reiterated, "I told you to go frick yourself! I don't need your help."

"Ergh..." Wally sighed in exasperation, "What the heck is your problem, kid? You allergic to people trying to be nice to you?"

Surprisingly, only silence met that remark.

"If you are worried about that girl from the other school, you know, that's a normal thing," Wally tried, "It's scary when someone you know is in danger like that."

"I'm not worried," Bakugo grumbled, "The whole thing just pisses me off because Icyhot didn't do his d--- job."

"It's not right to come down on him for one mistake," Wally said.

"A freaking mistake like that can get someone killed," Bakugo exploded at him--not literally, "Don't you understand anything about this, clown? For someone who claims to be a gosh-dang hero, you sure don't know anything about it."

"Hey!" Wally actually was provoked by that, against his better self.

"If you're a hero, you don't leave someone in danger like a freaking coward!" Bakugo snapped. "That's just idiotic! If you're expecting it, then you're just as dumb as he is! So screw the heck off!"

Wally glared at him. "I can't believe I'm using this line but: Is that really how you talk to adults?"

"Like I should care how old you are if you're a weakling," Bakugo said.

Wally had to bite back a really mean retort... Geez, he was usually so easygoing. What about this kid made him so wired? Maybe it was because he was such a jerk!

Sheesh, if he'd been a grown man, Wally'd have punched him by now.

It had been several minutes since the girls had followed Todoroki, and Wally had gotten this treatment the whole time. He was out of patience.

Shine came out right about then. She seemed tired. "How's it going?"

"He's impossible..." Wally said, "and he's just insulting me... For real, you think he's a good pick for all the sensitive topics you like to discuss?"

"You don't trust my judgment in this?" Shine said, a little hurt.

"I...just don't see it," Wally saidm "I mean...why do you bother...? Some people just are too stubborn, you know."

"You don't mean that, do you?" Shine said, "You're an optimist...more than I am. You think Batman will listen to you."

"Batman...I get him. I don't get this kid..." Wally said.

Bakugo heard all of that, though he pretended to be too far away to be in earshot. He scowled at the burnt up ground in front of him.

Shine sighed. "Give me a minute." She walked up to Bakugo.

"Go away," he snapped.

"Why are you giving Wally a hard time?" Shine asked instead.

"I'm not giving him anything. He's pestering me, that's what's going on!" Bakugo said savagely, "Call off your dog, Likstar. I ain't talking to him about anything."

Shine's eye snapped. "Excuse me?"

"He's only talking to me because you don't want to, or he doesn't want you to, so frick him," Bakugo said angrily.

"Ah..." Shine nodded. "I see..."

"No, you don't."

"No, I think I do. Hang on." She walked back to Wally. "It seems Bakugo is simply not as stupid as you think he is, hon."

"What?" Wally said.

Bakugo glanced over at her sideways.

"He can tell the obvious difference between how you and I perceive him, and he doesn't want to talk to you because you don't like him, and he knows that," Shine said, quite casually, "And...I don't blame him. I'll take it from here."

Wally frowned. "Shine, that's...kind of...you know...demeaning."

"Why?" Shine said, "Why should you have to do it if you don't feel any real compassion for the person?"

"It's not that I don't feel bad for him, but he makes it kind of hard to be sympathetic. Taking it out on other people like that, that's not okay," Wally protested.

"Both of us get offended on other people's behalf, Wally," Shine said in a lower voice, "I believe it's why we get along so well...but I don't think I really need to point out that, if you're going to let that get in the way of helping someone, you shouldn't be trying... The kid knows 100% when someone is not being real with him... You know, he can't be any different if you treat him the same...not really."

Wally frowned. "Is this a lecture?"

Shine's temper was very exhausted after today, and that almost put her over the edge.

But luckily, she remembered Bakugo was watching.

"No...I'm sorry... Let's talk about it later...okay?"

"Fine," Wally was miffed, "Later...I guess. I was just trying to help."

He went back inside.

"You let him talk to you like that?" Bakugo scoffed at Shine.

Shine turned to give him a dreadful look. "We are a team, you know. That doesn't mean we always agree. I'd advise you to stay out of it, since it's none of your dang business!"

Bakugo dropped that subject. She sounded too much like his mom.

"Well, anyway, I don't want your help either."

"I know perfectly well that you don't," Shine said, "And I'm not in the mood to argue with you... I see you've destroyed some innocent shrubs... I hope that they were insured."

That didn't get a laugh, naturally.

"Whether he likes it or not...Wally was just trying to help you," Shine said more gently, "Try to understand, he's very protective, and you hurt Todoroki badly by what you said. Most people are not going to be on your side after that."

Bakugo sniffed contemptuously.

"And you don't care," Shine concluded, "I'm not on your side either, for the record. I didn't like what you said at all. Even had it been true, are you above reproach? Are any of us? If you are not merciful, you won't be shown mercy when you screw up... and it bothers me to think of that."

"I don't care," Bakugo said.

"Is hurting him really going to make it better though?" Shine said in a different voice, "Does it actually? Or do you just feel worse because now you feel guilty?"

"You think I feel guilty?"

"I think that much is clear from how you're acting...but I don't think it's just about Todoroki, is it...?" Shine tugged her hair. "What happened wasn't your fault, you know, Bakugo."

Bakugo tensed. "Who said it was?"

"No one...but it wasn't. You did nothing wrong at all."

Silence. Bakugo finally turned a little but didn't meet her eyes. "If I'd attacked faster..."

"No, it wouldn't have mattered," Shine said firmly, "In fact, Dabi would have attacked us instead of leaving. You did as I said, and that's what kept things from escalating... I mean, you ran back when I told you not to, but I won't criticize it. If you hadn't gotten yourself warped away, I think Camie would have been in real trouble...so I'd say, you were right where you needed to be...all of you. There was some kind of Divine Timing in all that. I've thought it over.... It was a terrible time for us, but I still see how much worse it could have been. In the end, we had mercy... That's something to be happy about, but if you can't be happy, at least don't feel responsible for it."

"Don't bs me!" Bakugo yelled at her. Then he exploded, literally this time, but at another innocent plant, not her.

Shine just let it happen.

"You can yell and scream if you want to, Bakugo, but my mind is made up to be proud of you, so it won't do anything for me. If it helps you, go on ahead."

Bakugo just stared at her. "Are you crazy?"

"No...I don't think," Shine said.

She drew her sword. "I am ticked though... Mind if I join you?"

"Eh?" Bakugo gave her an odd look.

Shine walked a ways from the dorms, up to a tree on the edge of campus, and sliced through it. The whole thing fell down, and she cut it into pieces.

Bakugo watched...then came up. "What are you doing?"

"Taking out my frustration on something that can't get hurt..." Shine said, "This is for the LOV setting me up, and UA screwing us over.... This feels kind of good, honestly."

Bakugo watched as she sliced the wood into pieces.

"Well...what are you pissed about?" she asked.

"The League," Bakugo said. He blew up a part of the tree.

"And?" Shine prompted.

"Probably Dabi...and Icyhot ," Bakugo said, warming up to it.

"Yeah...that rings true..." Shine said, "Not about Shoto, but...ergh..."

After a while of doing this, Shine started picking up the dismembered branches and carrying them back to the fire pit in the courtyard. "It's cold. Might as well get some use out of our problems."

Bakugo helped... He was kind of curious. 

Shine lit the wood on fire. The students kept a starter outside.

"It's poetic, isn't it? Getting angry at our problems, without getting angry at the people involved in them, is just fuel for our fire... That's the way I choose to see it as, anyway. It's drive...but not revenge. Eventually, the anger burns away and you have resolve... That's cheesy I know, but sometimes it helps to be a little sentimental now and then about this stuff. Makes it seem less...inflexible."

Bakugo didn't say anything about it. He just watched it burn...then went back inside.