LEIGH

"My dad said, when I was two, I almost poked Lilith's eyes. I actually did it with a cotton swab in her ear. I still remember the ear-piercing cry she had for the whole day. Dad was angry at our mom for sleeping off and leaving me with a baby."

"You were still two then?" She moaned out the question, nibbling the skin around my collarbone.

"I was four at the time." My eyes were closed, my head concentrating on every detail of where my fingers were traveling around her beautiful body. "It was the same year we became electricians. I was the head of the mission, and Lilith was my assistant."

"What?" Giggling, she pulled back suddenly fascinated, and looked down at me but it was hard for me to do the same, she was laying over me, her flowery scented hair was flowing over my face, her bare body pressing against mine.

I could feel her in every inch of me. My body was critically responding to her and the screwed up thing is, we both agree not to do anything more.

We had kissed for an hour, explored each other's skin gently but hardly touched where we craved to feel each other.

I want to, more than anything else but I sure didn't want to take advantage of Ava. I can wait for the appropriate time to come and then I can take her without any guilt or fear.

She is so gorgeous, she deserves better.
I had scrutinized her smooth skin without blinking and I wondered if she was created differently.

Every part of her body was appealing and pleasing even without having her entirely.

She had asked to touch me, as she was curious, it was swimming in her naive eyes when they flutter from my sex and met my raw eyes. But it is unfair for both of us.

I can't have her touching me if I wouldn't touch her too. It's how it works. And I surely can't be pleasured without having her feel the same.

When we both agree she would feel me and nothing more, she nodded with her lips between her teeth and let me direct her hands over my erection. Through the process her hair fell over her face, covering her loveliness from me while we were both sitting on the bed, facing each other. Her legs were squeezed while mine was folded. I just had to hook her locks of hair behind her ears when she leveled up from exploring to stroking at quite a speed.

For the first time in my life, it was the closest to heaven I've reached but it lasted for seconds because I snapped out of it and shove her until she was laying on her back, laughing hard and loud for tricking me.

It was a great sound, I enjoyed it for a while, even smiling along at her adorability until I retreated and she couldn't catch her breath.

She was dripping wet, my fingers slipping against her sensitive skin, I didn't even do anything much, but she had her hips following my every moment until I snatched my fingers away, leaving her panting and chewing the tips of her fingers and her eyes begging for more.

I wanted to end our torture and spread her legs for myself. I wanted to watch every part that she had been hiding when she squeezed her legs with my hands in between them. I wanted to see what makes her lose control when I reach it. I wanted to see how wet she was but what I could only do was taste her juice that was sticking around my fingers while she watches me sadly.

"There is no difference in waiting." She had mumbled then and I lay over her, situating myself between her legs when she let me.

The sting in my heart had subdued the tinge in my rock-hard erection at the contact of her warm wetness. I just want to please her, but I was taught never to take advantage of moments like this.

It was punishment for her, but mine was hell and it was more fierce.

We had laid like that quietly for a long time until we began talking again, which lead to our childhood conversation, and now she was hovering over me, staring down at me while her hair made it hard for me to stare back as I continue telling her about Lilith's and I's childhood.

"It had just rained and the lights of the streets had gone off because of the storm just like the year when you ran over to me and we snuggled like this."

When I was able to open my eyes, I found her smiling crookedly, she fling a lot of hair behind her bare back before bringing her hands under her chin as she rested her arms over my chest.

"Back then, there was no snuggling with Lilith, it was strictly operations," I added and she blushed even deeper.

"What did you do?" She giggled, mortified at the memory of our first time laying together.

It was similar to right now except that we had clothes on and we weren't this happy. And I didn't have my little sister hitting on our stepsister that I had become so much attached to.

"In all our thinking the entire neighborhood power supply circuit runs in a certain power socket." I demonstrated the thought while looking at the plain white ceiling with my eyes hooded. "May God forgives me, I was dubious and nervous-" I was cackling when she interrupted.

"But the curiosity and bullheadedness had dominant the nervousness, huh?"

I couldn't help chuckling. Her body on me shook as I laugh.

"Somehow." My lips shrugged. "I let Lilith connects the socket to the power and it was then the men outside, actually working on the power supply, decided on trying the power." I embarrassing confessed and she propped up with bug-out eyes.

"Nooo..."

"Lilith flew." I continued humiliatingly, still chuckling though.

Her eyes widen more if it was even possible while having her palms slapping over her gaping mouth.
"To where?"

"The other side of the hall." I nodded sternly.

"No..." She chuckled terrifyingly and I couldn't restrain the laughter in my throat.

"Leigh?" She called half surprised-half amused.

"Okay okay, I admit, I hadn't been a very good brother."

"She said, when you moved here, you got the kids to like her. She said you're the best brother she knows." Her voice was soft, it soothed me and then it reminded me of reality.

I was in a race with my sister, and unlike before, when I would give her the trophies from my games after winning, this time I wanted to keep the trophy so bad to myself.

"I tried and now I am messing it up." I let out so quietly, that I doubt Ava heard me.

"Is not your fault." She shake her head and brought one hand to my face and the other into my hair.

"It doesn't matter. What we are doing is wrong."

She looked away from my eyes to my lips and swallowed, and before I could say anything more, she gets on her feet and strolled to the guitar that was hanging on the wall.

I pushed up to a sitting position and took the chance for a great view.

"Are you okay?" I asked the extremely quiet girl across the room.

She turned her head to look at me, her hair flipping through the process.
"Can you get me some water?"

It was irrelevant but I am always happy to help.

"Tea perhaps?" I offered and a tender smile took over her face.

"That would be great. Thank you." She said softly.

The kitchen was quiet and dark, I turn on the lights and followed every step to make the tea as she always like it.

I had slipped into my shorts, so I wasn't fully naked. I don't think I would like to explain to dad why I was walking around the house naked at night, should in case I came across him. Or if I would want to bump into my stepmother or my little sister with my junk ricocheting around.

While I rested against the cabinets, waiting for the tea to steep, I had a smile on my lips at the image in my head of the look on Ava's face while I was touching her for those brief seconds. It pulled me into thinking about what it would feel like to be inside her.

By the time the tea was prepared and served in a mug, not her preferred way to be served but I assumed she would want something much bigger than a teacup. So at that time, my head was preoccupied with everything about her that when I returned to my room, I was desperate to set my eyes on her again, but I found her covered up in my large t-shirt that covers most of her tiny thighs.

Not how I planned it but I wouldn't press, I joined her on the balcony, where she was seated on a sofa, watching the empty street from the distance.

When I hand her the mug of the tea, she smiled mesmerizing and mouthed a thank you.

"You've thanked me before I left the room."

"That's for you offering a better option and this is for you handing it to me." She shrugged, having her shoulder slipping out of the large neck of the shirt.

I smiled and kissed her hair before taking the space next to her. I brought one leg over the sofa and left the other nailed to the wooden floor, while my back rest against the arm of the sofa and my hands laced, over my lap.

I was thoughtful and serious suddenly, maybe because I want this every day of my life.
"Have you decided about college? You know we started talking about it in the mountains." My gaze was drilling into the skin of my hands while I spoke but I still felt her gaze on me.

"Yes."

"Ava, when school resumes, there's no dialogue you will have with your school councilors or parents that wouldn't be about where you want to go after high school and what you want to do then. Are you aware of that?" I look up at her and our eyes locked.

She stared back in calmness, there was no hint of bother in her composure, it tickled and worries me at the same time. She had the mug behind her lips, but I knew she was smiling behind it.

"You said I should come with you?"

"Is that selfishness?" I concernedly asked the girl watching me.

"Kind of." She said and my face fell instantly. She heaves a sigh and sat the cup on the stool next to her before she brought out something from behind her.

How she sounded next, wasn't very agreeable, she started nervously, "Leigh when I was looking for something to put on, from your closet, I didn't mean to be nosy but I found these?" She opened her small hand and my heart jerked from panic and then shrunk in my chest from shame. "What are they?"

"They're just, it's useless." I quickly rushed my words and try to reach for the pills she had found but she was quick to fold back her hand and snatch it away from my reach.

"Don't lie to me." She furiously glared, blinking rapidly. I should've known better than to leave her alone in here. "If you're asking me to consider trusting you with my entire life, that is my future. I think you owe it to me to not hide anything from me." Her lips quavered while I watch her from the corner of my wide eyes as my heart raced in my chest. "What are they? You don't use to have drugs in your things."

As she said the words, I could feel the disappointment and gloom in the tone. When tears welled up in her eyes, she looked down at her thighs and left me vacant.

"If-If you tell me you've become addicted, I will understand."

Her sorrow and grief were audible in those words and visible all over her complexion. She said that to deceive herself but we all know she wouldn't understand.

It pains me, she had to go through my pain.

I sat up a little, and reach for her hands but she snatch away the one with the drugs and let me have the free one. I didn't even have the intention of taking them from her. There was nothing more to hide.

"There are those prescribed to me at a hospital that a therapist referred me to and some from Julian, and Brandon." I honestly answered, dipping my head to meet her wet eyes.

"I don't understand." She said breathily with confusion clouding her teary eyes.

"None of them matters anymore," I emphasized and brought her hand to my face. "We are together now. I don't need them." I whispered and lean into her soft hand.

"I don't know what you are saying. You don't need them how? You used to need them?"

She was naive and scared, she became too vulnerable before my eyes. I just wanted to pull her into a hug and tell her, I'm sorry.

"Remember I told you there were moments I wasn't proud of? I was down and I couldn't play important games?" I continued when she nodded repeatedly, wiping her face with the back of her other hand while more tears drops over her rosy cheeks. "Julian thought the sedatives would help."

"So he is a bad person?" She croaked and wet her lips with her tongue.

Smiling, I kissed her palm that was under my cheek and lean back in its safety.

"I wouldn't say that." He had been a good friend in many different ways.

"It is bad. Leigh, really? That's not you." She whimpered and looked away from me.

She was angry, I could see it behind the pain in her eyes, but she was more worried, she was crying for me.

"Hey?" I let go of her hand and pull her to me until there were barely any inches between our faces. I wrapped my palms by each side of her slender neck as she refused to look up at me. "Claire booked a therapy session for me after then and the woman referred me to a doctor who gave me an adequate medication."

"Honestly?"

I nodded and she exhaled loudly.

"But sometimes they're not enough," I confessed to what got me returning back to Julian and now to Brandon.

"Why?" She looked up and all my walls fell.

She was broken.

"I missed you, Ava. I am sorry I couldn't deal with it wisely. I let it affect me in the wrong direction."

She was quiet for a moment. Her eyes had traveled to my lips some seconds ago.

I was desperate for her to say something until she asked another depressing question that brought a more dismal aura around us.

"When we were at school on the fourth of July, it was Brandon you had to see?"

Now, I am not only an addict, I am a liar in her eyes too.

"It was the last time. I told him I don't need his supplies. I am okay, you made me feel okay." I promised and mean every word.

She smiled small and asked, "You didn't tell him that last part, did you?"

Her smile was contagious. I shake my head, staring at her while she couldn't meet my eyes.

"Leigh this is bad for your health." She finally said. "I wish you had just called me, instead of all these hardships."

"You ask for space, Ava. I truly love you, I had to respect your requests."

"I am sorry. I am so sorry." She trailed off into sobs, snuggling into me to hide her face.

"Shh."

I brought her head to my chest as I lay back on the sofa, letting out a sigh.

"In daylight, we will get rid of them. Are you okay with it?" She mumbled after a long silence. Only she has no idea, I haven't needed anything anymore, now that I have her.

"As long as you agree to be my drug," I whispered in her hair and she giggled, her body shaking along.

"I will be your everything. I will be your wish granted from this day forth." She tightened her hug.

"You are so cute." I kissed her hair and held her close. "We should rest before they all wake up."