Wow it's been a while hasn't it? I honestly don't have an excuse as to why I haven't updated in so long. First I was too lazy to dig out my notebooks, then when i got writers block and lost motivation, then school started and along with school comes extracurricular activities. I kind of have problem with committing to things  So I apologize to the few of you who actually enjoy reading my short stories.

     ALSO if any of you read my last chapter about Hamiltodd, I'll give you a small update. We got over 9,400 views on the video in just a week or two, it was trending on Facebook in several different countries, and THE FREAKING CAST OF HAMILTON SAW AND LOVED IT! I may or may not have cried hysterically when I found out...don't judge. Also this is completely unrelated to the topic but, speaking of Broadway, OVER THE SUMMER I GOT TO SEE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA AND LES MISERABLES AND DIED A LITTLE INSIDE! THEY WERE SO GOOD! WE WERE SO CLOSE TO THE STAGE FOR LES MIS I COULD ACTUALLY SEE THE COLOR OF THE ACTORS' EYES!

     So, anyway, this story is going to be a little more personal than my other ones but I hope you enjoy this little glimpse of me!

      Doing anything in front of a crowd for the first time can be scary and hard and just all around nerve-racking. Your heart is beating out of your chest, your mind is racing, and you're shaking all over. You desperately plead with yourself to not mess anything up and you try to reassure yourself over and over again in the moments before you begin. I felt all of these things and so much more the first time I sang in front of a crowd. I was honestly terrified the first time I decided to share my talent, but I quickly realized it was something I absolutely loved. Gradually, my fear turned to confidence and my love of music bloomed into something beautiful.

      Ever since I was little, I have had a love of singing. I can still remember 5 year old Jackie waking up in the morning and belting out the Hannah Montana theme song until my dad was finally awake as well. I remember having karaoke sessions with my closest friends in my living room until we were on the floor laughing until our sides hurt(AuthorAllie us). I remember getting my first iPod and immediately driving all of my relatives insane because I wouldn't stop repeating Michael Jackson songs over and over again. It was something I knew I loved, but I was too scared to share my little secret with anyone other than my best friends in the safety of our rooms. 

      Then in third grade, I got a chance to share my love and hobby. Right after Christmas, one of the lunch ladies thought it would be a great idea to have kids sing in the cafeteria as a reward for us behaving ourselves (we're not a very good class). I watched multiple girls go up and do what exactly what I wished I could. I just kept telling myself that there was no way I could ever get up in front of that crowd, I couldn't do it. But after a few weeks went by, I somehow gathered whatever bits of courage were in my tiny eight year old body and asked that question: "Do you think I can sing today?" She nodded and quickly silenced the silenced my screaming peers while signaling me to move to the front of the room. I got a few last encouraging glances from my friends before I started that endless walk to the other side of the cafeteria.  

      That was the beginning for me. I still hear the cheers of 200 children in my ears every time I hold a microphone in my hand. I still see my friends standing from their seats every time I'm on a stage. Those few moments gave me the confidence I needed to realize that I shouldn't be scared to do what I love. Being onstage is like some kind of drug to me. It feels like there is pure electricity running through your veins and once you hear the applause, you feel like you could do absolutely anything. 

     One of the other things I love about singing is the fact that every song is a different story. With every song you get to step into a different person with a different mindset and different emotions. Now I'm not one of those people who is extremely confident in themselves so getting to be someone else for even a few minutes is great (also the reason I'm in love with theatre). It's like can be myself, but I'm a completely different version of myself that I'm actually confident in. And that's a wonderful feeling.

    Since that fire was lit in me, I haven't stopped. So far I've performed at numerous places and block parties around my county. I've also won a competition that put with the elite few of some of the best in our county. For now, i'm enjoying all that and whatever i do with my life, i hope I'll be enjoying it then too!