so i almost had a panic attack yesterday

lets talk about that

*dODOODODODODO*
*disney channel music*

so i went to the VMFA yesterday for a class trip
and we had to take pictures of certain works of art for a project that we're doing
we traveled around to the different exhibit collection...things i guess
so we were heading to the ancient egyptian part of the museum and i started like sweating and freaking out and i was like "oh shit i think i'm going to have panic attack"
h e r e ' s  w h y

-flashback to when i was like 5 or 6 or something-

i went to an ancient egyptian exhibit with my parents and i was super excited about it, and one of the only things i can remember from that time is looking out the glass wall of the elevator down at the exhibit entrance and being really happy. so we went inside the exhibit to watch a video about mummies and that shit. and let me tell you i wAS FUCKING TERRIFIED. the videos were about how the mummies were made and that kind of fuckery (i don't really want to explain, because it's really creepy and gross and i'm kinda uncomfortable with it and i also don't remember much). after we walked out of the movie viewing area kind of thing, we walked into the actual exhibit to see the mummies and i was so shook and like...i don't know, disturbed i guess? i remember i hid behind my dad (who was holding my hand and trying to get me to look at them and stop being so scared even though i was on the verge of tears) because i was so afraid of the mummies and they were like right there, the actual corpses and the sarcophaguses. i had nightmares for a while, like 2 weeks or something. i remember a part of one of my nightmares. i was in my room, sitting in my bed, and i leaned over the end of the bed to look at the floor and king tut's sarcophagus slid out from underneath my bed and kinda like stared me in the eyes. that's all i remember. and i've been scarred ever since.

-flashback to now-

so we walked into the area and rIGHT THERE i see a fucking sarcophagus and i start panicking and memories were flooding back and i was actually about to have a panic attack because i was lightheaded and my heart was beating really hard and i was sorta hyperventilating and i kinda felt like i was slowly starting to die. nat and my other friend valerie were walking next to me and they were asking like "are you ok" and stuff and i was like "no haha i'm gonna have a panic attack" and they helped me calm down and not...die inside i guess and i didn't look at the mummy. also nat said the mummy looked like playdoh and she guided me away from it and that helped a bit. i don't know what i would've done if they weren't there, i probably would've freaked out 10x more because i've never had a panic attack before this? i have great friends.

-timeskip like 10 hours later-

so after i got home and i had dinner (i took like a 4 hour long nap because i was so fucking tired, i rolled down a grassy hill with my friends like 7 times and my legs hurt really bad too so i had to take some benadryl so i'd actually sleep but i was stil tired this morning oK bACK TO THE STORY) i laid down on the couch because i was tired and in pain. my dad came over a little later and i told him about my near panic attack.

and he fucking invalidated it and told me to stop being silly and he told me to stop making myself scared. and i was like "no i was really freaking out" and he still was like "oh stop it" and "you're being silly stop freaking out over this stuff" and i didn't bother to argue back because i was still tired and i can't argue back because it's my dad. cAn'T diSObEy tHe pAreNts iN tHiS cHRiStiAn hOuSeHoLD.

but seriously, like. sIR DO YOU THINK I WANTED A PANIC ATTACK. DO YOU THINK IT'S ENJOYABLE. N O. IT'S N O T. I WAS GENUINELY SCARED AND PANICKED BECAUSE OF PAST MEMORIES.

i went to bed not long after because i couldn't deal with my dad's bullshit. my mom wasn't helping either, in fact she contributed to that so yeah, night night hope the bedbugs fucking attack you in your sleep.

and yeah that's it that's my story.
i got cool pictures out of all that though.
look

lOOK AT ALL THAT PRETTY ART
S C R E E C H
and here's nat being art

*dies from too much gay*

ok, hope y'all had a good day, i had a decent one. luv y'all bYe ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️