I don't know if anyone is reading anymore..

I bet you got tired of waiting for me to update and everything..

I am trying,but its hard to write when your head hurts from studying almost all day,and at the end of the day you just want to lay down,and possibly watch some YouTube videos..

I have caught up with some games and here is my opinion..

Bendy and the Ink Machine:I simply adore the style and the lore that is going on,can't wait for the next chapter in the game

Cuphead:very classic and I love the cartoon style and that catchy music!it reminds me so much of those old school cartoons I watched as a kid!(I am not really into the incest between Mugman and Cuphead that goes around on wattpad,but for some reason I ship Mugman and Cala Maria xD)

Simulacra:ah,another scary phone game from the developers of Sara Is Missing(SIMulacra,Sara Is Missing..anyone?no?okay)..now,let me get some things straight,I love these types of games,because they are so freaking real!almost approaching reality!in Sara Is Missing the whole black magic and colts got me the chills but in Simulacra..BOI the scares I got from the glitches,the images,the sounds and basically everything!and don't get me started when her photo changed from looking down,looking at us and then having that FREAKING SMILE LIKE O.O I only got one of the endings,where Taylor got absorbed by the Simulacra so I can't wait to check out the other ones!

I haven't really checked that game because I am scared as fuck,its from the developers of Welcome in the Deep Web,and that game gave me nightmares,the sites,the noises,the kidnappers you have to watch out for!I don't remember the name of the newest game and even though I want to see what's up,I am scared..Like I said,those games that are so close to reality with technology and shit,those are the best but also give you the frights..

I don't think I have something else from those games,yet if you want to suggest me something let me know!

But back to our point..

The reason I am making this its because I want you to guys know..I want you to know that I love you,that i care about you and also the fandom!

People say I got bored of fnaf and stopped writing,that's not true!

I LOVE the game,and I can't wait for the next 8-bit game with Freddy juggling pizzas and then fnaf 6 and possibly for the movie!

Speaking of movies,I can't wait to see Coco and also who is excited for Toy Story 4 and Incredibles 2?!I will be one of those adults in the theaters XD

Oh my God..

I said adults..

ADULTS

I am almost an ADULT

HOW IN THE FUCK NOO-

Anyways,can't wait for many movies,even horror ones ehehe

I changed subject again,fuck.

So,as you know I am senior year in high school..

Its really hard,lots of studying,trying to get both good grades for school and also be okay in my tutor..

I need to learn things by heart which is a pain in the ass,I hate myself even more even by doing a small mistake..because that mistake can cost me my entry in college..

Ugh..

I am not the smartest person..and don't you dare say that I am smart because I am not!my intelligence is decent,I don't get A's,only if I am 100% sure I can get an A..

Its hard to make both parents and tutor happy..they say I will struggle this year and then you will have the best years of your life..

Possibly I will go for to be a teacher in elementary school..I am useless I can't find anything for me that will work out..

Also,wouldn't that be enough,I am doing night school,which that means that my school is from 2pm to 8 pm,at night..

And in the morning is my tutor..

Why that you ask?

I just happen to be part in a natural disaster..(I don't want to give away my place so please respect the fact I don't say much)

I remember almost 3 years ago,(yes,its getting soon 3 years of when I started being an author on wattpad,even though I was here since 2012),I remember saying that I will travel and see things..

And now I am crying thinking that it won't happen because,dreams don't come true..

At least for you,your dreams,you that is reading it can come true,just believe in them and in yourself!

And..I know it will sound weird,but I don't know if its a coincidence but..now lately I do things that I used to do when I was young..

Drinking hot chocolate,dipping some cookies in and watching cartoons..

The good cartoons,back in the day,the original Tom and Jerry and Scooby Do..before I started watching Disney Channel which happened to be the golden era of shows,Jack and Cody,Hannah Montana,Wizard's of Weverly Place,and the 'latest' ones such as Good luck Charlie,Jessie and Austin and Ally..

I even watched That's so Raven!

When I stopped watching shit happened in Disney ._.

Anyways!

What I am trying to say is that I am stressing a lot,almost losing sanity..again..

I want to start the stories I mentioned in the previous chapter but they need a lot of time and also,in one story I need to get permission from a YouTuber artist(who happens to make reviews on fnaf stuff and make theories)to use something of her own because it really inspired me!

There are,so many things to learn,and I need to keep them in my head so I won't forget a single word..

*sighs*

I don't think in Christmas i would have time!probably I would go on holidays which is shocking because I wasn't supposed to go so I can study..

This makes it worse!If I look outside of the car window and admire something I will forget everything!

See,I am slowly going crazyyy..

Not that I wasn't before,but now I want to kill myself more than anything knowing how my life would probably be.. :)

Fake smiles are the best smiles! :)

And,guys,if one time you talk to me and I am,sad,stressed or being a bitch,don't take it personal please..just it was a bad moment,I love you ❤

I don't think I have anything else to say really..

I feel tired every time and just..ugh kill me already..

Possibly I will publish some art with Bendy and Cuphead,the styles are a bit simple and so fun to play with!

I don't know when it will be the next time you will hear from me..but I hope soon..

I thought of giving up on writing and drawing before because I wasn't good enough..but the fact I am here means that I slapped myself and said "stop being such a depressive shit and keep on going on something you love to do!"

:)

Thats a tired smile.. :)

at least I am trying :')

Stay safe guys,I love you so much,take care of yourselves..

I love you,love you,love you! ❤❤❤❤❤