4/9/19

I need place on my phone. Don't mind these. I'm doing good, no one worry. I'll just be adding my thoughts to these too.

Is it bad to have a person to give you those long hugs? Like, I only feel like I can forget everything around when I'm being hugged by a certain someone. Is that bad?

It's even harder to say "My heart is breaking" (for me at least)

I, I've always pretended to be happy when I'm sad and empty. That's all I'm saying for now

I hate the feeling of depression and anxiety.

I have nothing to say about this one except, it's true

This one. This one is just. I- i dont even know. I can go long times feeling better about myself. Then depression breaks down my door without "knock knock" and just destroys my carefully built castle of confidence and happiness I'd built when it was gone.

At the moment, I understand this one way too deeply. My moods go WOOSH WOOSH WOOSH. I'm happy one moment, raging the next, then in tears the next. I'm messed up

Depression is feeling empty inside and not always knowing why

I think, something I hate about myself is the fact that I can't even say "I'm not okay". It's gotten to the point where even if it's my closest friends, I can't say "I'm not okay". Because right when I'm about to say it, i feel the tears threatening to roll down my face. We made 'fine' to have a different meaning. Fine doesn't mean ok. It means not ok

I understand this one so much. Im really childish, outgoing, extroverted. And for a while, it was me pushing myself to keep pretending to be happy. It's painful thinking about it now

Reality is the nightmare sometimes