So two of the kids in my Youth Group just started dating. It was honestly a big surprise for me because they're such different people and I had never thought of them as even friends really. Though I had noticed them getting closer over the months.

Now a close friend of mine (who may actually read this eventually) (and is also a good friend of the boy) is very sceptical about the whole dating/romance thing. He was telling me about how they were playing a game, and the boy was a team captain and was obligated to pick the girl first because they're dating.

I was thinking about this, and I came to this conclusion:

I will want my future boyfriend to pick me first for games.
Not because of me being his girlfriend.
But because I'm one of the best at the game.

It's not about us.
I'll know I matter to him even if he doesn't pick me first for some game. I don't need that to validate me.
Of course I will want to be in his team. Of course I will.
But it's fun if we're playing against each other too.

His loyalty in a game (and at work, etc.) is to his team, and to do the best for them. This isn't about our relationship.

And I strive to be good at the games my friends and I play. Yes, I know I'm really not amazing at some of them. But I'm an athletic person. And I can be competitive, or not really care. It really depends on who's playing.

So when it comes down to it.

I want to stand by his side.
An equal.

And I want to deserve to stand there.

I want to be chosen because of my skill, like any other captain would've chosen me. Not favored because I'm his girlfriend.

So. . . Yeah.

That's what I think.