As told in my first memories, I always imagine a girl who could love me, so for your thinking, I could be defined as lesbian or bisexual (until now I try to figure it out), because I do feel men are so sexy and hot in some ways, I just haven't fell for any men yet. It makes me confused sometimes, but I don't deny that I do fall for girls, women, it's just the part of me.

The first time I'm interested in a girl was me in primary school when I was studying for the 5th grade. She is one year younger than me. I met her when my friends and I came to her class for lunch because my primary school is a boarding school.

She was so cute and adorable in my memories with long dark hair and girly light blue dress. I feel so strange that I don't like to see myself look girly, but I like feminine girls. She was the president of this class, so she had a responsibility to take care of my friends and me who came to her class. I think you are wondering why her but not the teacher assumed that duty because our school was encouraged the students to be more active and confident in making decisions and plans, the students mostly had to decide themselves even they are kids. For lunch, one class had to come to another class for lunch, there was a timetable for this activities, students had to follow that timetable.

When my class' s students entered her class, she smiled friendly and introduced herself. Until now, whenever I think about that day, I feel so stupid for thinking she only smiled with me. By the way, she just did as her mission as giving us the place to sit and eat our lunch. After that our class and her class helped each other to bring and spread the mattress on the floor so that we could take a nap for 1 hour before the afternoon class. (As my culture, we need to take a nap after lunch, so we could have enough energy to be perky for the afternoon.)

I didn't know that I was luckily or not, but my position was next to her position. As a kid, my reaction was just delighted and couldn't sleep when lying beside her. She also couldn't fall asleep, so we decided to slightly and quietly play a game. I drew something I wanted on her back. Then she would guess what it was. I'm a ticklish person, especially in my back, so only me drew, and she accepted to be a guessing person. It was enjoyable for us to play.

I ate lunches and took naps in her class for the whole first semester of my 5th grade. However, in the second semester, I changed my class to another class. That class was the special 5th grade's class for only smart students in my school. After changing, I didn't need to go anywhere for lunch any more. My new class was allowed to eat lunch and take naps separately with other classes. I sometimes met her in the stairway, or on the campus, we mostly smiled slightly when meeting each other, but we didn't talk to each other. Then I graduated and left that school to go to secondary school. I have never met her again since that moment. It's quite sad to me when coming to the end of that memories, but it's still good whenever I think back about those days.