This is all true and I will update everything each day when I can I'm not gonna write about this part yet or I might start crying anyways🔫🔪bye

Let's just say these 2 videos kept me from doing something 3 times

Okay so since 6th grade I've always thought maybe if I killed myself then maybe people would feel bad for what they did. Yes I'm admitting I was suicidal. I tried to commit suicide 3 times and my family does know yet they still hurt me. Every year of middle school I've tried to commit suicide. I am in 8th grade and I tried to do it this year of 2016.. I honestly don't know why. I just have this mindset where I feel like no ones there and no one cares.. I feel so alone. Sometimes I think why the hell am I even alive. I don't see a future all I see is blank tbh. Yeah yeah I have to wait but why? Why the fuck do I need to wait. Why can't I just die and never have a future.
The only reason I haven't killed myself yet is because of my 2 best friends and my little brother. I think about if I killed myself my brother won't grow up with a sister, a role model, or a mentor. I wanna be there for my best friends and my little brother.