"Om" Anika called him as she barged into the room without a mere knock, her face pale and filled with anguish.

Gauri and her name sake husband turned to her worried.

"Bhabhi... what happened?" Omkara asked rushing to her as she wailed.

"Om... Shivaay... vo... pool side... Om" she spoke in between her sobs and he nodded before running out of the room in the direction of the pool where his brother lay wasted.

Gauri neared the woman who had always been kind to her "Bhaujai... what happened? Please just sit... Omkaraji will..."

"No Gauri... Shivaay... he will break down... I have to go"

"Bhaujai... just for a minute... sit ... I will get you water...I am sure Omkaraji will manage him for some time" she said placatingly making Anika sit on the bed. She then walked to the bedside table to fill a glass of water and gave it to her.

Anika looked at the glass and then at the girl who was like a sister to her. No matter how much she held herself back, she felt an unknown connection with the beautiful girl before her.... She reminded her of her .... chutki.

Gauri looked at Anika lost in thoughts and placed the water glass near her lips. Her sister in law, mutely drank the cool liquid quenching her thirst and wiped her mouth with her sleeve.

The younger one placed a comforting hand over the elder's shoulder making her look into her eyes which were visibly tired but the light in them always shown bright... giving her hope.

"Now tell me what happened bhaujai"

Anika narrated the incident where Shivaay planned to drug her to extract the truth which was responsible for their divorce and how the events turned out with both of them getting intoxicated, her ex-husband getting the major share. She told her how he broke down in her arms when she slipped the truth which would question his identity and honor.

"Gauri.... I never wanted to tell him the truth... I always loved him for what he is... I don't know how he will take it if he gets to know that he..."

"No bhaujai... do not tell me..." Gauri stopped her "This is between you and your family.... I don't need to know anything which doesn't relate to me" she said.

"But Gauri... Om knows... I know you will not..."

"Bade bhaiyya and you have always given me the position of the daughter in law of this house... I am forever thankful for it bhaujai... I love both of you equally... I don't want to side anybody when that time ever came..." she said with a fond smile.

"Who knows if bade bhaiyya forgets everything once he gets up tomorrow? When he asks me, I might tell him what I know... I don't want to hurt either of you...so let the matter rest for now... Sleep here for tonight bhaujai"

"But Gauri... Shivaay..."

"Omkaraji hai na... he will take care... shall I get you any clothes? Do you want to freshen up?"

When she got a yes in reply, she got up to walk to Anika's room to get a fresh pair of clothes asking her to use the washroom until she came back.

***********************************************************************************

"Anika" Shivaay mumbled in his sleep as his brother helped him into the room and made him rest by tucking him in his bed.

What a fate his brother had... He loved Anika and she loved him too... yet they cannot live with each other only because name, blood and lineage had to intervene.

Why is his brother so obsessed with Naam, khoon , khaandan? What if he gets to know that he is illegitimate? His ego will take a blow and so will his heart.

God forbid that day never comes... he prayed as he sat beside him on the bed. He sighed, tiredly rubbing his face as he thought back to his sister in law.

Anika bhabhi... how is she faring? Did Gauri settle her in her room or did she leave already?

He got to check it himself... he thought and slowly walked towards Anika' room which was right beside Shivaay's.

When he saw Gauri taking things from her sister in law's cupboard he frowned in confusion.

Gauri turned around at the sound of footsteps and caught the look on her husband's face....

Wait... husband?... No... not when he refused to accept it. May be she can call him a friend? No... he left her with Kaali when he knew she was posing as chulbul.

Then what should she think of him...? A nobody?... but she stayed with him for months... she wouldn't have done that for a mere nobody... right.

May be she could call him her savior... yeah... that's it... he did save her life once.

"What are you..."

"Anika bhabhi asked me to get her clothes... I am not stealing anything... you can check for yourself" she said showing him the clothes.

"Gauri I did not mean..."

"I don't know the extent of lows you think of me.. so, it is better I expect the worst... it is less painful that way" she said and walked past him.

"Will she not come here?" he asked to her back making her turn around.

"No... she looked shaken and I thought she wanted someone by her side today... I am sorry I took the liberty of asking her to sleep in our..." she started to explain but stopped "Sorry... your room"

"Gauri... I..."

"Is bade bhaiyya okay?"

"Will you let me talk Gauri?" he asked in exasperation not liking the way he was cut off before he completed his statements.

She remained silent looking at the clothes in her hand as though asking him to speak and he sighed.

"I am sorry" he said and she stopped herself from rolling her eyes.

"I know a sorry will not change anything but please... please know that I regret what I did to you" he said trying to make her understand.

"I was going through a very bad phase when I met you and it just so happened that I saw what my eyes made me see... Truly if I knew that you were the victim I would have helped you out of there... believe me"

The images of them taking pheras around the fire and him filling her hair line with blood flashed through her mind. She also remembered how he pushed her away the very next minute and closed her eyes to numb the sting of his rejection.

"I know Omkaraji... and you did save me... I am thankful for that... No matter what happens, I will always be indebted to you" she replied in a calm tone and he heaved a sigh relieved.

Omkara shook his head in a no "What I did was nothing compared to what you did for me Gauri..."

"Thank you" he said with a small smile and she smiled back.

"Can I go? Bhaujai must be waiting for me"

"Yeah... thanks for always being there... I don't know how to reduce my guilt of treating you so badly Gauri... if I can do anything... anything at all"

"It is not needed Omkaraji... you were just the victim of bad circumstances... I was angry sometime back but I am okay now... I do not want to leave this house on a bad note... I realized I have too many memories attached to this place and too many people I love to lose them for a petty fight with you" she said and his smile withered.

"Leave? You are leaving? But.. you said you are not angry"

"Yeah... but I don't have a right to stay here Omkaraji"

"But... Gauri"

"Do you consider me as a wife?"

The answer was his silence... like always...

His heart leapt with joy when she rightfully called herself his wife but his past held him back, robbing him of his voice.

"There you go... we are back to square one" she said in a mocking tone and he turned his gaze away from those beautiful hazels which held questions.... Questions which he feared answering to.

"I will stay the night with bhaujai and leave tomorrow... I should take my leave now" she said a moment later and walked away without waiting for a response.

*****************************************************************************************

Omkara struggled to sleep through the night, his heart and mind at constant war. He always took pride in the fact that he took decisions without being judgemental of a person's background unlike Shivaay who thought his family'spride came first before everything else... but then life happened.

He had been taught a lesson not to wear his heart on his sleeves because people are selfish and they won't be thinking twice before they crush it, stamp on it if it meant they can satisfy their greed.

Today he so desperately wanted to talk his heart out... he wanted to scream that he wanted her in his life... that he wanted a second chance at living his life the way he wanted to...but he was afraid.

What if this was a mirage....?

Afterall, love was always conditional. Gauri might be devoted to him now... she might be an ideal wife now but what if she changed?

Didn't his father do the same? His parents married for love didn't they?

It was all cheers and colors in the beginning before the darkness engulfed one, stealing the very reason to live...

No...He cannot be his mother... he would never want to be in her place... he vowed as he wiped a tear and turned to his side giving in to exhaustion.

When he woke up the next day, his brother was adjusting his tie before the mirror looking fresh and ready for work, making him turn to the watch to note the time.

Seven in the morning was too early for his brother to start work... what is he up to?

"Shivaay? Why are you dressed up so early?"

His brother turned to him with a solemn look making him sit up in worry "What is it?" he asked him and the later walked to him in determined strides.

"Yesterday when I mixed weed in Anika's food... did you tell her about it?"

"What? No Shivaay... why will I.."

"No? then how did I eat..... urrghhh... Om... she told me something important... I am not able to remember it.. It was something about my pride... what is it...? Please Om... tell me.... what is it?" he asked in earnest plead.

Omkara helplessly looked at his brother shaking his head in a no and heard his brother curse out loud. Sighing at his incapacity of not being able to do anything to lessen his brother's misery he looked away from him only to note the presence of his sister in law at the entrance of the room.

Getting up, he excused himself out of the room to let the couple talk while he took care of certain important things.

**************************************************************************************

"Gauri are you going anywhere?" Jhanvi Singh Oberoi asked her daughter in law.

In response, she smiled nodding a yes "I have to leave for Bareilly maa ji... I have a train to catch"

"Is there a problem? Is your mother unwell? Should I come..."

"No... maa ji... everything is alright... I just..."

Jhanvi watched the young girl fumble with words when her gaze fell on her slender neck devoid of jewelry.

"Are you coming back?" Jhanvi asked looking straight at her and the lady stopped looking away.

"Gauri... tell me the truth... are you coming back ever?"

Jhanvi gasped clutching on to her daughter in law's hands, when she saw her shook her head in a no "What happened Gauri? Did he say anything? Did you two fight"

"Nothing happened maa ji..."

"Then why are you leaving my son Gauri.... misunderstandings are common between a couple aren't they?"

"We were never a couple maaji" she answered in tone filled with longing and Jhanvi couldn't help but feel bad for her.

"No Gauri... you are the daughter in law of the house... how can you leave like this... I will talk to Omkara" she said and turned to leave when Gauri stopped her.

"I am not the daughter in law of this house maa ji" she spoke "Neither did your son accept me as his wife nor were our vows complete... how can I be a bahu without becoming a wife first?"

"Gauri...."

"Ek tarfa pyaar ho sakta hai maa ji... lekin ek tarfa Rishta nibhaya nahi jaa sakta (one sided love can happen maa ji but one cannot keep up a relation single handed)"

"It is true Maa ji... Omkaraji was clear since the start... I was the emotional fool here... My mother was an innocent person thinking that the man who saved her daughter and married her must be equaled to God. I just believed her words without question and now I realized how wrong I was"

"Your son is a good man Maa ji... bahut ache hai vo... but vo achai mere liye nahi hai. (His goodness doesn't apply to me...) I am not angry that he misunderstood me because I know our own eyes might deceive us. But it breaks my heart to think that he never even thought to clear those misunderstandings... he never even remotely tried to understand me maa ji... and that fact bothers me ... a lot" she said her eyes starting to fill despite her efforts of self-control.

"I was too busy in fighting for his safety...his family and protecting him from his problems, that I forgot that I have to love myself before I start to love somebody else"

"For, how can anybody love you when you don't love yourself...? when you deny yourself your self-respect how can some other give it to you?"

"Gauri... I know Om has been too stone hearted with you but believe me he wasn't like this before... My Om... mera acha beta... he was snatched away from me Gauri... only because of the wrong decisions I made.. he was just a victim of my failed marriage" Jhanvi explained her eyes pleading the woman before her.

"It was only after you came into his life that I could catch a glimpse or two of my Omkara... Tell me this Gauri... when you look at him don't you feel him lost and given up on his life? Those eyes... didn't they ever ask you for help?"

"Maa ji... I cannot..."

"Please Gauri... you are my only hope for my son to get a life filled with love... I will do anything you want me to do... but please don't give up on him beta" she said caressing her cheek.

Gauri looked at the weeping mother before her with a heavy heart... She knew that what she hoped for was nothing but a castle built in air. All it needs is one gush of wind to crumble down. But could she ever explain it to her?

How was she to tell her that if she stayed any longer to try and get to know her son better, she might not be able to keep her heart safe from him.... because deep down she knew that her Omkaraji was a good man.... But the very same man never thought twice to drive a dragger through it, whenever he felt like it.

"Gauri?" the elder woman's voice made her come out of her thoughts.

"You will stay with him to make him a better person.. will you not? Please say a yes" she heard her plead again.

"Maa ji... I..." she started her heart drumming against her chest "I will stay" she said and was soon engulfed in a warm hug filled with gratitude.

"I know you will Gauri... you love him so much that..."

"Maa ji" she cut her off "I agree to stay here but I have a condition"

**************************************************************************************************

Too cliché? Too emotional??

How was it?

Serial based kahani mein drama avoid karna difficult lag raha hai mujhe... I can improve if given some tips.

Need votes and comments if you want me to keep going...

Signing off... yours Soujanya.