(originally posted March 15, 2013)

(A/N ... I went back through the transcripts of this interview and I have restored parts that were initially edited out)

Nanny Olive (1)

So, tell me why you wanted to do this part as an interview, rather than you write it? You did so well with the story of Travis.

Thank you. It was really hard to write. You always make this writing thing seem so easy. It isn't. At least not for me.

(Zara pauses and takes a deep breath)

I tried to write about Nanny Olive, but I couldn't. I kept breaking down and crying and no matter what I wrote, it didn't seem right. So I figured the best thing to do was let you interview me about it. Maybe then I could get through it. If that is alright with you?

Ok. As long as you are sure.

I am. Let's do this.

Ok. So tell us about Nanny Olive. Why was she such a huge part of your life?

Oh my God, Bill. Where do I begin?

(Another deep breath)

My Poppy Travis died before I was born. Mom and Dad had just gotten married and Nanny Olive invited them to stay with her. 

Nanny Olive is your Mom's mother, right?

Oh, yes she is. My Dad's parents lived in a different community at the time.

As I was saying, Mom and Dad moved in with Nanny Olive after Poppy died. Dad was a truck driver for a company in Twillingate. He was on the road a lot and after I was about four or five, Mom would go on the road with him, to keep him company. They would be gone for a week at a time, most of the time, so it was me and Nanny Olive alone in the house. 

She would look after me, help me with my homework, and tuck me in at night. For the most part, she raised me.

I'm not saying Mom and Dad weren't there for me, but they were gone practically every second week, so it was me and Nan.

Did you ever regret your parents not being around more?

In a way, sometimes, I guess I did. I mean, I was a young girl. I wanted my Mommy, like most young girls did, but at the same time, I was lucky to have Nanny. She looked after me, like I said, but she also taught me to cook and bake, tend the garden in the summer, showed me how to knit, to sew. You know, all the things a young Newfie outport girl should know. 

I did miss Mom and Dad, but Nanny Olive made it so much easier.

Ok, do you want to talk about that day?

(Zara stared straight at me. I could see tears building in her eyes)

We don't have to do this hun.

(Zara shook her head and reached for a tissue. She held it to her eyes and kept it there as she spoke. Her words were forced and she spoke quietly)

It was July17th, 1979. Just a few weeks before my 12th birthday. God, Bill. It seems like it was yesterday. 

It was really hot that summer. Unusually hot. Of course, none of the homes in our community had air conditioning. I mean, that wasn't even thought of in those days. I remember we had two fans. I remember that. One was always in Nanny's bedroom and the other one, we would move around the house, depending on who was home. When Mom and Dad were gone, I got to use it at the foot of my bed.

I remember we only used them at night, because Dad said they used to much electricity.

(Zara took the tissue from her eyes. They were red)

I must look like shit?

You look beautiful.

(Zara forced a smile)

Yea right. You don't lie well, Bill.

(She reached for something on her desk. She held it up for me to see. It was a picture of her and her Nanny Olive)

Me and Nanny. That was taken just a month before. She looks so happy.

So do you, Red.

(She kissed the picture and held it to her chest)

Like I was saying, it was so hot that summer. And of course, Nanny would never be caught dead in anything light and airy. She would always wear those long dresses and an apron over it. And no matter how hot, she would always be in that damn kitchen baking. That fucking wood stove never stopped, no matter how hot it was.

I knew something was wrong that day. She just wasn't herself.

In what way?

She just wasn't. When I came down for breakfast, she was just sitting at the kitchen table, with her head in her hands. She didn't even have her cup of Tetley. Tetley tea. 

When I asked her what was wrong, she said she just had a slight headache. She said she just needed to lie down for a while. Yet she still got me breakfast, even though I told her I would do it myself. As soon as she put the food on the table, she kissed my forehead and went to her room.

Nanny never took a nap during the day. I thought it was weird, but I just passed it off. I was only eleven, and all I was interested in really was going outside to play with the other kids. We would go down to Muckfords Cove and play in the tidal pools. The water was pretty warm but at least it cooled us off a little.

I remember looking in on Nanny before I left. She was sleeping. I know she was, because I could hear her snoring. Nanny used to snore all the time.

I remember she had herself covered up to the waist in a comforter. Funny I remember that.

I turned on the fan, so she could get some cool air and I went out to play.

So, how long were you gone?

Oh my, it was hours and hours. I remember I went to Jenny Muckford's for lunch and right after lunch we went back to the beach and stayed there until Jenny's Mom called her for supper. She asked me if I wanted any, but I said I had to go home. I was sure Nanny would have supper ready.

Did she?

The house was quiet when I got there. I remember going straight to the kitchen, but there was no one there and it didn't look like there had been anyone there all day. I checked the stove. You know, I lifted up one of the covers and checked the fire. There were only a few embers, so I put in some kindling and a bit of paper and started the fire again. I figured Nanny would want some tea.

I called out her name several times, just to let her know I was home, but there was no answer. I was a little worried. It was not like Nanny to not be home when it was supper time. I thought she might be next door at the Dove's so I went over there, but they had not seen her all day. So I went back to the house and went upstairs to Nanny's room.

And what did you find?

(Zara took several more tissues and dried her eyes. Several minutes passed by before she was able to speak. She looked down at her hands while she spoke.)

Nanny Olive was still on the bed. It looked like she had not moved at all. I knew something was wrong, because she still had her glasses on and she was not snoring anymore. Her eyes were closed and her face was looking right at me. At least that's how it seemed.

I called her name several times, but she did not answer. I walked to the bed and shook her slightly. I didn't want to scare her if she woke up. But she never woke up.

She never woke up, Bill. I kept expecting her eyes to open and for her to smile at me, but there was nothing.

(Zara began to cry. She looked up at me)

I'm sorry Bill.

That's ok, hun. Do you want to take a break?

(Zara simply nodded and disconnected the Skype feed)