(Originally posted April 5, 2013)

So you got a call from Doris?

Yea, it was about two weeks or so later. Dad had suffered a massive heart attack and died. As if he didn't have enough shit going on with the cancer. Then to suffer a heart attack.

But at least it was quick. And he died in his sleep.

How did you feel?

Numb. I guess that's a common feeling for me. But it's the only way I can describe how I felt. I was just starting to feel good about getting back in contact with him and at the same time trying to prepare myself for him dying. Isn't that just the fuck of it all? The whole fucking story of my life.

Just one giant fuck-storm after another.

(Zara goes silent)

I'm sorry, Bill.

For what? For being human? Zara, if I went through half the shit you have, I think I would be a hell of a lot angrier.

People are gonna think I'm a nut case.

I don't think anyone will feel that way.

(She smiled a sad smile and took a deep breath)

So. Back to Newfie again for the funeral. Thank God for Nicki. She was persistent about going back with me. She said there was no way I was going back alone. She was such a friend. It made things so much easier.

Auntie She was going to go with me, but I talked her out of it. She was never that close to Dad and I felt it was best that she didn't. I honestly don't think she wanted to anyway. She was just doing it for me.

We stayed at the house with Doris. We were going to stay in Twillingate, but Doris would have no part of it. She was such a sweetheart.

I have to say though that it was weird staying in my old room. I made Nicki sleep with me.

(Zara laughs)

It was a little tight quarters, but we managed. It was a good thing we were such good friends.

We buried Dad next to Mom. Doris was fine with it. It was what he wanted anyway and Doris said she would have it no other way.

She told me that as much as Dad loved her, his one true love was Mom.

It was such a beautiful day. The sun was shining. I mean it was still the middle of a Newfie winter, but it was so warm. Dad would have loved it.

I was so sad that you could not make it, Bill.

There was no way hun. We were locked in with a blizzard on the west coast.

I know. That's why I was so glad Nicki was there. I don't know if I would have handled it without her. It upset me more than I expected.

I guess, no matter what, he was still my Dad.

And I did love him.

So, what did you do before you went back home?

Dad's will left everything to me. He never changed it. He was never one for crap like that. The wills were made when Mom was still alive, actually just before she died.

Doris offered to stay at the house until it sold.

I just shook my head. I had already had a document drawn up, just in case. I didn't want the house. Doris had been good to Dad and good for Dad and he did love her. So I signed the house and property over to her, with the condition that I was allowed to take some personal items from the house.

Doris agreed immediately. She was so good about everything. That made my decision to give the house to her feel even more right.

What did you take?

My Nanny Olive's rocker. Some pictures, photo albums, some personal things that were in the basement. Dad had packed up all my old shit and stored it in the basement. I took a few smacker items with me on the plane, but for the rest I just hired a moving company and they brought the stuff to me on their next trip off the island.

So, is Doris still there?

(Zara nods)

She stayed. She is married again now. Actually the guy is a distant relative. A cousin, I think.

Jay and I have been back a couple times to visit. We usually stayed one night at the house, but mostly we rent a cabin, just outside of Twillingate.

But we always make time for Doris and Fred. That's her new hubby.

I talk to Doris at least once a month. It's nice to still have the contact with her.

I bought a beautiful headstone for Mom and Dad's plot. And I make sure there are fresh flowers there all the time. A local flower shop delivers them all summer and in the winter there are artificial ones. Mom loved her flowers.

And that was that. They were all gone.

My Nanny Olive.

My Mom.

My Dad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zara's words

June 3, 2015

Muckford's Cove is nearly empty now. Most everyone has moved away. I think there is only 2 families left in the cove now and a couple houses are still kept up for summer cottages.

The community of Crow Head now has about 300 people left there.

Since the fisheries pretty much closed down, there is very little employment opportunities there.

It is still a beautiful place to visit and the view from the lighthouse there is absolutely spectacular.

We are actually planning to visit again in August.

Jay wants to buy a new motorhome and drive down.

I am not 100% sure about that.