(Originally posted March 22, 2013)

So what happened between you and Brian after that?

We continued to date and on New Years Eve, at the stroke of midnight, he went to one knee on the dance floor where we celebrated New Years and he proposed to me.

I was shocked, but I was also the happiest woman alive. I accepted immediately.

We were married in February 1991 and did a Mediterranean cruise for our honeymoon. 

Three glorious weeks. It was magic. It was a fairytale come true. I was sure that I was with the man that would be my one and only for the rest of my life.

So, what changed?

I should have seen it from the beginning. I guess I was really just a stupid little girl. I mean I was so confident in myself, up to the point I met Brian. For fuck sake, I travelled the world alone and I took pretty good care of myself.

But when I met Brian, I don't know, he made me feel like I could rely on him. That he would make everything right and I no longer needed to be the strong independent woman that I had become. I know I should have been more careful and that I was losing myself, but I didn't care. I wanted someone to look after me.

He told me that I was his wife now and I should act as one. After all I had vowed to love, honour and obey him.

Yes, he actually had those words put in our wedding vows.

He bought us a house in Hamilton, because he didn't want our children growing up in the big city and the commute was only about an hour. He said he would make it home most nights but if he was working late in Toronto, he would stay in my old apartment.

He felt we should keep the apartment for that reason. And I could pop in from time to time if I was in Toronto.

Please don't give me that look.

What look?

That one. I know what you are thinking and I know what others will think, but I was in love. I really was.

He said it would be a good idea to keep my old apartment, so he could stay there on late nights and it would be good for him when he returned from his regular district trips, not to have to travel the extra hour to Hamilton late at night.

It made sense to me. Besides he bought me a car to get around in and I got a job at one of the grocery stores in the chain as a cash register supervisor, so my life was pretty full. I met a few woman in my neighbourhood, joined a bowling league and a book club.

I was becoming a real urban wife.

So how long did this last?

About three years. I kept in contact with Nicki over the years and she would visit me at least once a month and stay a couple days.

I mean, seriously, I thought my life was wonderful. Uncle Peter always praised the great job that Brian was doing. I got to see Zoey at least once a month. I had Nicki and I had a husband who worshipped me when he was at home.

The only problem was, I was not the only one he was worshipping.

How do you mean?

It was early 1994. Brian and I had been married for just over 3 years. I wanted children, but he kept saying that we had lots of time. That we were both still young and that we had lots of time to have kids. For now we should just enjoy life.

And we did enjoy life. 

We went on two vacations a year. We went to Mexico, Bahamas, Hawaii, Cuba and Jamaica. We would ski in the Rockies. We would regularly see hockey games and baseball games. Life was amazing.

Then it all came crashing down.

I was at my Aunt Sheila's when Nicki called me, which was no big deal. She asked if I would meet her at our pub for a drink. I agreed. 

When I got there, she was waiting outside. She asked if she could use the washroom in my old apartment. She said she was on her period and she needed some privacy. I never thought anything of it.

We went upstairs. I opened the door and the first thing I was greeted by was clothing all over the floor.

For a second, I did not think much of it, Brian could be a slob sometimes, but there were also women's clothing there.

I looked at Nicki. She was in tears. I remember her saying, "I'm so sorry Zara."

At that second a naked woman walked out of the bedroom. She looked at me and screamed. A second later, a very naked Brian joined her.

Every cell in my body wanted to rip this woman to pieces. Every piece of me wanted to tear Brian apart.

He started to come toward me. The first thing out of his mouth was that typical male bullshit line..."This isn't what it looks like."

I remember shaking my head. I also remember that your words, Bill, came back to me. I turned to Nicki and told her to take me to my Aunt's.

I cried all the way there and I cried all that night.

What did Brian do?

Nothing.

He never came to me. He never tried to explain. He never even checked to see how I was.

Nothing.

Not a fucking thing.

A couple days later I went back to Hamilton to get my things. He had already been there and collected his stuff. On the kitchen counter was an envelope that contained divorce papers.

I was stunned. In all honesty the next few weeks were a blur. My aunt and uncle and Nicki got all my belongings from the house. I moved in with Nicki. She had just broken up with her boyfriend. I simply sat in the apartment for weeks, in a stupor. My life was over.

One day I woke up. I called Uncle Peter and asked if he could get me a job. I went to a lawyer and she agreed to help me fleece that fucker Brian.

I decided that fuck it. I'm better than this. 

 And what happened?

(Zara smiles)

I fleeced the fucker. I got the house and half the assets. He didn't even fight it. As soon as the papers were signed, my Uncle Peter fired Brian. I sold the house. Didn't get shit, but I got enough for a down payment on a house just a few blocks from my aunt and uncle.

I moved into the house with Nicki. We furnished it, painted it, fixed up the garden.It was a great time. I decided to swear off men for the time being and concentrate on me.

I took night courses in business and accounting which I aced thanks to Auntie She. I got a great job with an accounting firm and within a year I was asked to be a junior partner

.By this time, Nicki had moved out. She had fallen madly in love with a guy by the name of Will James and they were planning to get married.

Everything was great. The only thing left to do was apologize to one person who could have saved me all the bullshit, if I had only listened. But I never made the call. At least not then.

 It was around that time that I got the phone call from Dad.