Years later

I was on the floor, acting like a monster in front of Jace, my little beautiful two old son who looked every bit of Scott. I’ve seen pictures of Scott as a toddler and I swear it was Jace in the picture, "I'm going to get you!” I said in a witchy like voice. Scott had just took Jaycee, our six year old daughter to kindergarten. She had his dark hair and brown eyes, but she had features of mine.

Jace squealed and ran away and I chased after him on my knees, making myself seem bigger. I caught him and tackled him to the ground, tickling and blowing at his tummy, making him giggle and squeal. Jaycee was in preschool and Scott was at work. I looked up at Jace's hazel eyes he got from me, "You going to be a good boy for mommy?”

He shook his head, "No.".

I pretended to bite at his tummy and he chuckled more, trying to push me away, "Okay then!” I said.

Suddenly the phone rang and I got up, helping Jace up. I was chuckling when I went over to the phone and picked it up, "Hello—Jace stop it, mommy on the phone. Sorry about that, hello?”

"Hello, is this Abigail Crow?” a lady on the other side of the phone asked.

I was caught off guard a little now, "Oh um, that was my maiden name. Yes, that me.”

"Oh good, I found you.” she said.

My eyebrow came together, "I'm sorry, who you are?”

"Oh, well, I'm your father wife.” she said and I froze when she mentioned my father. I ignored the slapping Jace was doing to get my attention. The old weird feeling I use to get when I was a teenager came back and I couldn't help but be afraid. "Abigail?”

"Sorry, sorry, I'm here.” she said. "Oh, um, I didn't know my father got remarried.”

"Yeah, a few years back. My name Joan, your father talked about you and your brother a lot.” she said.

I didn't know what to say, I wanted to just hang up on the women, but that would be rude and I was kind of curious to know why she was calling. Why her anyways? Why not my father? Not that would be any better, but it was a little strange. I cleared my throat, "Okay, well, um....” I didn't know what to say. I haven't seen my father in how long? Almost ten years? No word, letter, nothing. That's how I liked it though, but.... I didn't know what to think.

"I'm afraid to tell you, your father passed away two days ago.” she said and I just stood there. I wanted to jump, celebrate, through a party. Well, that's what I use to think. My whole life, I knew I couldn't wait for my father to die. But now—did I just not care anymore? It felt like being told someone you only met like three time they died. You feel bad, but you’re not sad.

"How?” I asked, curious to know what could have taken that man who was never a real father to me or Tyler.

"Well, it was cancer, but your father drank a lot.” she said.

Of course he did, I thought. I knew that would never change. My mom use to be the real alcoholic in the family, but that didn't mean my father didn't drink also. He must have gotten worse after he lost us.

"Well, um, thanks for calling me.", I said.

"I wanted to tell you that, but also that your father service and funeral this Friday if you and your brother wants to come.” she said.

My head was drumming with so many thing I wanted to say. Like how I never want to go near that man again even though he was dead now and I don’t want Tyler to either. Of course Tyler doesn't remember anything about our father and I plan to keep it like that. My mom and I tried our best to tell him he wasn't a good man and he understood it. My mom did start dating a man—a good man who taking such great care of my mom and Tyler. Tyler see that man as his father, not William Crow!

"Thanks, Joan. Goodbye.” I said and didn't wait for her to say anything as she hung up. I leaned against the wall and brought my hand up to my forehead, rubbing it. She looked down at Jace and he looked back up at her confused. She bent down and picked him up, kissing his cheek, "I love you so much, Jace.”

*

I was making dinner, flipping the chicken over as I thought about my father. All those years he abused me, they just keep flashing in her mind. I could always ignore them throughout the years, I got over it. But right now, it wasn't always a good thing when I thought about my father. It made me depressed.

Scott came into the kitchen, sounded happy as he always is. He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed down my cheek, "How was your day, dear?”

He knew something was wrong when I didn't answer, didn't giggle, or kiss him. I just stood there.

"What's wrong?” he asked. "Are you feeling sick?”

I shook my head and turned around in his arms, "Um, no.", I said, trying to figure out how to tell him. Scott didn't like talking about my dad as much I did. I still haven't even told my mom or Tyler yet. I was planning to do that after dinner. "I got a call today.”

"From who?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"My father wife.” I said and his eyes widen a little in surprise. We didn't know he got remarried, it was a huge surprise that evil man could even find another women to be with. Probably lured her in, acted like a nice guy, got married, and showed his true colors. "Yeah I know, surprising. But he died two days ago.” she shrugged as if wasn't something of a big deal.

He stared at her for a moment, trying to take it all in. "Oh, wow. What killed him?”

"Cancer, but he was drunk also.” I said.

"Ah.", he said, moving his arms around m tighter and I loved him for doing it. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah...yeah, I'm fine. It's just...I can't believe it though. Like, I know he's dead, but it just feels like...” I trailed off, not sure how to even finish it and I looked away.

"You have to see it with your own eyes.” he finished.

I looked at Scott again, "No, no, I don't. He's dead, it's a good day.” I said as I got out of his arms and turned around away from him.

He sighed, "Abby, I didn't mean to make you upset. But I do think that's what you need, you need closure and I think you can only do that is by going to the funeral and seeing it with your own eyes.”

My eyes began to water up and they fell down my cheeks and I knew he was right. I just didn't want to admit it. But I needed closure though or I might regret it her whole life.

Scott touched her arm, "Abigail.”

I turned back around, wrapping my arms around his waist to hug him. After a few moments of hugging him, I looked up at him, "We don't have to stay through the whole thing, right?”

"Of course not.” he said. "We'll just go in for you to see it and we can leave. We do anything you like.”

I gave him a small smile and laid my head back on his chest.

*

Three days later.

After having to travel to Rhode Island, I walked into where the service was. I had called Joan back the next day, asking where it all was. She seemed a little surprise, but she told me. I also called my mom and told her. She was just like me, but she had said her goodbye way long ago to him when they got divorced. Tyler was asked if he wanted to go, but he said he barley even knew the man and wasn't really his father. He objected.

So it was just me and Scott. I was nervously playing with my hands when we got close. I was a nervous wreck, I didn't know what was going to happen.

"You’re going to be fine, Abby.” Scott said and I turned to him, giving him a smile.

"Thanks for the confidence.” I said, but it wasn't very helpful.

When we got to the services, it wasn't a lot of people. I wasn't very surprise, my father wasn't a social man. I could see him across the room in the open casket and I squeezed Scott hand. He bent down to my ear and whispered, "It's going to be alright.”

What was worse, everyone that was here, looked at us like 'who the hell were they?’ I wished I knew what Joan had looked like. But I guessed it was the forty something looking women who was coming over towards near them. She was a little plump around the stomach and had dark hair with some white strains here and there. She looked sad, but not to sad.

"Are you Abigail?” she asked.

I nodded, "Joan?”

She gave me a small smile, "Nice to finally meet you? Your brother didn't want to come?"

I shook my head, "No, he was very young when my mom and him divorced.”

"Oh, right.” she said. "And you must be Abigail husband, Scott.”

They shook hands, "Nice to meet you.” Scott said, but he already mentioned to me how bad he felt for the women and not because her father died.

"I'm sorry, but we're not going to be staying long. I just came to give my respect and leave.” I said.

Joan nodded as if she understood her, "I get it, it's alright.”

We stood there for a moment. I wasn't sure I could do this anymore. I just had to ask, "So, um, how was my father these last few years? How were...how were you two?”

"Oh, we had an okay marriage. You know, no one marriage was perfect.” she said, giving a force laugh. "I'm sure you know already.’

I nodded at her this in understatement, "I do.”

"Your father left half of his money to you and your brother.” she said.

I shook my head again, not wanting anything from him, "I'm fine, I'll give it to my brother for when he goes to college.”

She nodded, "Well, it was very nice to have met you, Abigail. You father did want me to tell you one thing though, but I not sure if you want to hear it.”

I did actually, but I’m not sure how much. "Go on.”

"He said that he's sorry and he's very proud of you for however your life ended up." she said, rubbing my arm before going over to be some friends were.

My eyes couldn't help but water up and I wanted to run out of there crying, but Scott turned to me, "It's going to be alright, Abby. You can do this.”

I wiped my eyes and nodded, "I can...I can.", I said, trying to bring myself to walk over to the casket. I hesitated, but turn and walked over to the casket. It was like in those movie where as I walked towards him, it feels suddenly quiet and everyone has suddenly vanish until I make it to the casket.

My father looked older, not to old. He was only in his fifties, but he did appear older then when I last saw him at the Skyler Sir home many years ago. His hair had mostly gone grey, he had wrinkles, and he actually had a beer belly.

He's there, something I always waited for. He's gone.

I stared at him for a few moment as if he was going to wake up. But he never did, he stared right in there. "Goodbye daddy.” she said and took one more glance before turning around and walked back over to Scott, hugging him. His made sure his arms were tight around her as he held her. "I want to go home to our kids.”

Scott rubbed her arms, "Lets get going then.”