possible trigger warning: depression - mention and conversation about experience

october 2017

"come on, love," sam whispered into (y/n)'s ear. "everyone's up." she did nothing but roll over and groan, her eyes pressing together tighter. "babe, come on." she still didn't reply. "okay, i'll come back in a few minutes" and with that, he left.

her body twisted and turned, getting comfortable in their new bed. she arrived late the night before and was thoroughly jetlagged, but that wasn't the only thing anchoring her down. sam appeared minutes later, once again trying to get her up but reached no luck.

(y/n) had managed to fall back to sleep and sam decided to keep her that way, but only for a few more hours. he walked back downstairs and agreed with harry, tom and harrison that he would stay with her at the house that day. and with that, he climbed the steps again and laid next to (y/n), his body sinking into the memory foam mattress.

it had been three hours since then. sam had gotten in and out of bed whereas (y/n) and woken up and fallen back to sleep multiple times. once sam thought she'd had enough sleep he once agin tried to get her up.

"baby, come on," he huffed, sitting beside her on the bed. "you have to get up now"

"sam, i can't" she mumbled.

"why not? you just take the quilt off" he began to mirror his actions.

"sam, stop" she pulled them back on. he tried to do it again, thinking she'd take it as a joke. "sam, stop"

"i'm only trying to get you up"

"and i said i can't"

"why not?" he leaned down closer to her face.

"because i'm depressed" she said plainly moving away from his face.

"no you're not, you're just tired"

"sam, there are things you don't know about me. that's one of them"

"wait, what?" he pulled a puzzled face.

"i'm depressed. i haven't been like this in a while - since i met harry really - but it comes back sometimes," she sat up straight, ready to explain. "so when i was twelve i was diagnosed with depression because things happened and - i don't want to talk about them - i went to a therapist. i had medication and people treated me differently. i hate it.

"but as soon as i met harry, i felt a little better. i finally had a friend. and even though i haven't told him this, this depression, he made me feel happier and forget everything that's happened. then i met you and your family and i realised there are good things in my life that i need to focus on. building my relationship with you was one of them and making sure you were okay was another.

"i love being with you and your family because you make me forget what's happened in my life: you treat me normally and don't drag me to therapists or force medication down my throat. and i'm so grateful. i'm sorry i never told you. it's just been hard"

sam had no words. he was so gobsmacked that all he could do was adjust his position on the bed so she was laid on top of his chest, his back pressed against the bed.

"don't apologise. and don't worry about things: i've got you now, no one can hurt you"