Chapter 4

Lu Ruo Xi
The Black Sword Academy

She wanted to practice for another round. Practicing always helped in keeping her mind at bay when there were so many things to think and worry about.

She raised her sword to the sky and turned around to fight against the air. Fighting with the air was the easiest thing because being a competitor against yourself was way easier than competing against someone else. And that is why she kept what she felt inside and had learnt an excellent way of hiding and not showing it.

When she saw him coming to her, she already knew something was up, and because of it her mind raged menacingly. She didn't like how Li Lian did not value the emperor. It was awful and a shame to watch.

When he was pining for her, Li Lian played around with Lance, not caring at all. A shame indeed.

Hong'er was suspicious of everyone. All his life, he had been chasing after betrayers, traitors, liars, all the people who had any leverage to hurt him. However, what good was it? If only he knew that the biggest threat was not in the world but right beside him, more so his heart.

The other day, she saw Lance and Li Lian kissing on the deck. Of course she wasn't going to say anything about it because she was not that kind of person, but it pained her heart to see Hong'er being made a fool, not knowing that the woman he was in love with was the curse in his life.

Thousands of letters were sent to Ruo Xi, telling her how he was in love, how he would do anything for Li Lian and how he would die for her even if he had to. Yet if the same was demanded from Li Lian, would she do it for him? Ruo Xi doubted it.

Why was life so unfair? Why was it that when it came to love, people always fell in love with the people who were not meant for them?

"Why are you fighting against yourself, don't you have someone to play around with?"

The previous night, he was angry at her, stating their friendship was history. However, this morning he had demanded her to practise with him, having forgiven her quite easily.

Hong'er didn't realise it, but he had a weak heart for those he cared for. Because they were few and when he cared, he did it with all of his heart, unconditionally, with no compromising.

She smiled sadly. Her heart ached because of the shadow behind his eyes. She knew the clouds of pain behind that. "What has happened? Did you fight again?"

He faked a laugh. "You know me after all. Is it possible to hide anything from you?" He shifted, moving from feet to feet. "I don't know what to do. I mean I thought I and Li Lian were something, but like always, my desires are bigger than what she can offer. Her feelings for me are a fantasy of mine, rather than a reality." His next words were spoken under his breath, a mist of hurt in them. "She doesn't like me, no way is it closer to what I feel, and I feel like a loser for it." He rained a few curses and instructed his court lady to hand to him his smoking pipe.

He smoked now. It was a new thing for Ruo Xi.

She watched him letting the eunuch light the inside material, then Hong'er skillfully tapped the pipe and inhaled the smoke, thereafter looking into the sky as he puffed it out.

If only she could hit Li Lian until she woke her up. What made her blind to what was before her, Ruo Xi couldn't figure it out. However, if Ruo Xi did not want to be the villain in the story, she needed to be a calm and agreeable person, living by "see and hear no evil".

This is what she hated, he was always telling her his heartache and qualms, breaking apart before her just so she could put his broken pieces together for him, then watch him go back to his lover as a whole person, ready for Li Lian to do the damage all over again.

She rested part of her body weight on her sword. "Why don't you just speak about it? Everything is solved through communication just as I have said to you before."

"If only it was that easy, but it isn't. Love is two people coming together and trying to put each other's wishes first, not being selfish but compromising. Only that way can there be vision and not division. I don't think Li Lian understands this. She wants her way. She wants me to always compromise with the lies, unknown past, things that don't add up," he stopped to drag in and puff out the smoke, "sad isn't it?"

She shrugged. "I don't know what to tell you in a fair manner without expressing my anger towards her. I just advise you to weather through the storm and come out stronger because you two have come a long way to give up now."

"I am too mad to see straight Ruo Xi, she always does this to me. And to think I was ecstatic over finding the person I see as my beloved, but here I am already, stressed about the fate we have in front of us. I know this is not the best thing to think about but deep down I am questioning whether it was a good thing for me to find out she is alive. Li Lian in my heart turns out to be my greatest love than the Li Lian in front of me."

She smiled sadly and patted his back to power him up a little. Then, out of her curiosity, or maybe because this was the closest she could come to sharing something intimate with him, she took the pipe out of his hand and smiled innocently, thrilled and excited when she saw his heavy eyebrow lift in a daring manner.

It was a glimpse of a moment that they shared. And because it passed so fast, she questioned if it was in her mind or real as she lifted the pipe and breathed in the vapour that stung her throat and pricked her lungs that she coughed.

Tears brimmed as she continued to cough and he laughed at her while he took it back. His laugh was quite infectious, irresistible that she laughed along, and there again, they shared a moment together.

Happiness. Something Li Lian couldn't give him. She was nothing but an illusion and Ruo Xi would wait for him to discover that himself.

And if he didn't?

She didn't care either, because when they were together he never guided his heart. He gave it all to her. And that was more than enough for her. Romance and relationships were for weasels.

"How do you feel?" He bit his lip and she didn't think he was aware of it, but it was the most alluring thing that set her heart losing control for a beat.

He continued. "Your clan is replacing the Wei clan to be the new South Wing, and we may not want to admit it or speak about it, Ruo Xi, but it is what it is. You are going to enter the palace as my consort soon, which is going to be our new normality. How do you feel about it?"

She sighed. "What can I say? We knew the day was coming from way back, and now that it is here, we cannot run away, but face what is ahead. I have done everything to my liking and lived life to the fullest without any regrets, so this comes at an appropriate time where I have no complaints toward it. My clan has provided for me to live the best life they could afford me. They have moved heaven and earth for me, Hong'er. The best thing I could do to return the favour is entering the palace as an obedient and filial daughter."

"Well, then. When do you leave? Has my grandmother sent the letter of request to you? I know she can't wait to increase the harem in number." The last bit was said in detest by him.

"My training, in preparation of entering the palace, starts next week. I have already spoken to my master about it so in a fortnight, I will be in the palace."

"Well done for all your achievements. I will also be waiting for you because it is a delight for me to have anyone who is close to my heart in the palace, it just makes it less lonelier and my days less longer."

"Don't get ahead of yourself. I can be the worst consort," she joked.

"Can't wait," he winked.

Her heart halted. He was flirting with her and she didn't know how to respond, to not be too forward and all.

"Me too. It will be like the olden days where we could..." She stopped talking, realizing his attention was no longer on her. He looked behind her, his eyes enlarged in panic.

Ruo Xi looked back and saw Li Lian walking toward their direction with Fang Qing, from afar.

Turning back to Yuwen Hong, she saw him push the pipe back into the hands of the eunuch, the court lady running to him with refreshing mint water that he quickly gurgled and spit. Just as he handed it back, a couple of maids hid everything in their sleeves and quickly disappeared.

The court lady then took a perfumed sachet and started to dab it on him to conceal the irky smell of smoke.

It all happened so fast, that before she knew it, he stood casually, pretending to not be staring at Li Lian as she passed them on her way toward the juniors' grounds.

Who was Ruo Xi kidding? Hong'er was stupidly smitten. Years of friendship, Hong'er had never panicked because of anything until now.

S.V