My Last Memory of You

My body shivered. I pulled my raincoat around my torso, until it was difficult to breathe.

    Rain poured down on the trees, on the grass, on the sidewalk. I didn't mind though. Focusing on the soft patter of water hitting the ground was easier than thinking about him.

    "I don't have anything else to say," Liam said.

    His brown hair was damp and stuck to his forehead. It was messy and unkempt and I had to fight every urge to brush my hands through it like I had done so many times before.

"How can you say that?" I whispered.

I had always assumed his eyes were gray because he was the perfect balance between chivalry and idiocy. He was funny to a fault, which made him stupid and lovable. But he was also charming and honest, which made him one of the bravest people I'd met. I admired him.

"You know we can't." His voice broke. "It doesn't work. We don't work."

Even though we had talked about it for months, it was only now that I realized this was as difficult for him as it was for me.

"We don't know that," I said. Tears began to leak from my eyes, and I was too distracted by desperation to flick them away. "We can talk it through, work it out . . ." I trailed off.

My eyelashes fluttered. This was the last hope I had. It was this, or I would lose him forever.

"There's nothing to work out," he said. His eyes were glassy, pleading for me to understand, for me to walk away because that would make this less painful for both of us.

But I couldn't do what he asked. I couldn't walk away.

I had hated him since the moment we met. Then, I didn't. I knew we couldn't be friends, I knew that we could never work as anything for logistical reasons, but I didn't have the strength nor desire to stay away from him.

He was like the sun. His smile made me happy in an unfamiliar, pleasant way. Every day, just seeing his face made my day better. He was a magnet, pulling me towards him, even though our charges were identical and could never attract.

There would always be a space between us.

I could try to change it, but it would change who we are, and I didn't want that. I wanted him to be in my life and for him to be happy. But if I was blessed with everything I wanted in life, then it wouldn't be unfair

"Because we can't change who we are," I whispered with tears streaming down my cheeks.

It felt as though a dagger was carving out my heart. I'd always subconsciously known there was a price for the joy he'd brought me, but I'd never imagined it would be him.

"No, we can't," he said in a quiet voice. The rain slapping against the sidewalk became louder. "If either of us changed . . . the other wouldn't be able to live with themself."

"I don't want you to change." My voice was small like a lost child.

"I don't want you to change either," he said with a sad smile.

His smile, combined with the gravity of never seeing eachother again and the weather, made me laugh, before water started dripping from my eyes in a steady stream. I was crying.

"I'd never dreamed that I'd lose someone like you," I said with a teary-smile.

Liam laughed.

"And I never thought I would be lucky enough to share my life with someone like you." Water brimmed his eyes, and I knew it took everything for him to not break in front of me now.

Silence passed between us for what seemed like hours. Neither one of us wanted to leave because that would mean things were finally over, but we couldn't stay either. We were at an impasse.

"All good things must come to an end," I finally said, taking a step away from him.

It was what I needed to do to let him go. If I didn't walk away first, I would never be strong enough to walk away at all: it would kill me.

Liam nodded solemnly and took his own step back. We now stood three feet apart on the sidewalk.

"They must," he agreed, "but that doesn't mean that we have to forget the good things. We'll carry them with us for the rest of our lives, and one day, we'll wake up, and we'll be better people because of them."

My heart clenched, and I closed my eyes.

"You really think so?"

"I know so," he said. "Now, close your eyes and count to sixty."

I smiled. "But my eyes are already closed."

"Then keep them closed." I heard the smile in his voice.

One, two, three. . .

At ten, I felt soft pressure against my nose.

"What are you doing?" I said in protest, ready to open my eyes. "You're supposed to be walking away."

His hands covered my eyes

"No, I'm supposed to be saying goodbye. I can walk away after."

"Can you?" My voice was unsure. "Won't that only make things harder?"

"Yes, it will make things harder. But I don't care. We remember the good things, remember? I want to remember this—my last memory of you."

Water droplets rolled down my cheeks. They were no longer because of the rain or because I was crying; they were a combination of both.

I felt every cold drop of rain that ran down my face, and I felt every ounce of the pure happiness that Liam has brought me over the past four years of my life as he hugged and kissed me goodbye.

I thought we had been standing together for hours, but when I opened my eyes, after I finished counting, Liam was gone, and I was all alone in the park.

My eyes told me he never existed, but my heart knew that I would cherish him forever.

He was right. Just because good things must come to an end, doesn't mean we have to forget them.

I know I won't.

AN: This is the first short story I'm publishing, and I actually love it. This is one of those projects where when you start writing it, you can't stop until it's complete. And I feel like this story is complete.

Not all stories have a happy ending. Every once in awhile, I think it's nice to read a bittersweet story where you learn something meaningful or gain a new perspective in life. Though I am a relatively positive, happy person, like anyone else, I have experienced dark things in life.

Personally, I like to take an introspective approach opposed to reminiscing over the things I can't changed. As hard as it is to lose something meaningful to us like a relationship, we learn from it and become a better person because of it. It was a creative decision on my part to emphasize this with this short story.

Hopefully, whether you believe in love or not, this story brought something meaningful to your life. I know it did to mine.

-E.N. Dennery

This an entry to The Writer's Block Writing Contest by @-TheWritingFox

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