Toby was still lying down and I checked the time 4:57 I walked up stairs and made a pot of coffee and grabbed a cup and filled it (yes I drink black coffee) it was 5:37 and toby walked upstairs rubbing his eyes "coffee?" I asked "sure" he smiled "how much cream?" "Just a little bit" I smiled and poured in a little cream and filled the rest with coffee and walked over to him he was sitting at the table "here ya are" I smiled he looked up and smiled "thanks " "welcome" "how come you were upso early I herd you you sounded worried" just just lookeup from his cup "oh just a bad dream " he just looked at me "about?" Oh no just thinking about this dream made me want to burst into tears a dream about my suicide I shuddered "Erin " toby yelled and I snapped back to reality "oh uh can we just not talk about it?" He looked worried "sure" I just finished my coffee and put my cup in the sink and walked down stairs to pack my bag "hey Toby I'm going him today" I yelled to him "alright do you wat me to walk you home?" He yelled back "I don't care if you want to " I yelled "of course I want to" he yelled I smiled I finished packing and left out my clothes for the day a panic!at the disco tee and some black skinny jeans and my combat boots I curled my hair and did my cats eye eyeliner and put in my contacts "finally I can see" I thought I seen something moving out of the corner of my eye "Toby is that you?" It moved again shit I closed the door and locked it and all of a sudden some one was banning on the door I crawled backwards till my back was against the wall then I herd "why won't you let me in Erin I'm your best friend " my heart felt like it had stopped it was Adrian "NOOO" I screamed "it was your fault all your fault and you just can't open your eyes to see it " I started to cry "NO IT WASNT " I screamed "yes it was " I cried harder why why why? I can't do this anymore "do it Erin do it" the malice in his voice I looked over at my bag and grabbed the blade slid it across it started to bleed I just staired at the door and it stopped the banging and shouting then Toby came in I kept crying he held my wrist until it stopped bleeding and he made me look him in the eyes " you can't leave me don't do this I can't live without you" I felt my eyes role into the back of my head and me fall backwards and after that I couldn't feel I just seen darkness nothing I felt like thewhole world around me collapsed like it was gone