[More love it seemed]

Now, it wasn't news to anyone that I loved Korean culture. Even though I was technically invisible at school. I was known for one thing. I would say “and one thing only” but, were would I add my befitting title; 'Miss, I know not what the answer is'?

All this was courtesy of my snobby classmates. One in particular, but that idiot will not be a part of my story till the day I die. Yes! I said so. Mtchewww.

I was referred to all as, 'Korean monger'. Not smart, I know. But accurate. There wasn't a K-series in this world I didn't know! Ironic. If only I took more time to fill the empty space in my brain with anything other than K-drama.

AJe, I for don become 'Miss'... Something else entirely.

I could narrate an entire episode of 'jumong' without breaking a sweat. Given I managed to hold an actual conversation that is.

P.s, I'm talking about South Korea. Make una no go dey mix am.

Their way of life fascinated me. I was drawn by them. I just...loved, ALL. THINGS. KOREAN! I even started taking lessons on the language without my parents knowing.

Omo, Instead of me to be reading my books I go dey try pronounce words.

“Shey na Annie yeon. Or Anyo?”

Chai, the things K-drama lovers go through.

Now here I was, face to face with an enigma. I didn't even know it was possible to marry a Korean. I honestly thought it was nothing but a far fetched dream. So pesin actually see Korean take marry? Na yin I kon dey here? For wetin?

“S..s..so, you mean you're actually a half breed?”

Moremi tilted her head to the side, as if wondering whether I had sense or not. Shey I no hear well before? Okay, she probably wasn't thinking that. But, It felt that way.

“Yup! That's what I am. But, don't'cha think the term 'half breed' makes it sound like I'm an outcast to society?”

I tensed up. Did I fuck up?

“Ehn? No o! I didn't mean to make it sound that way. I was just...”

She started laughing before I could finish my defense speech. “Omg, I know. Calm down. No need to get so worked up.”

Me? Worked up? Is that what it was? Was I actually getting worked up talking to this 'Dream come to life'? Better question. How was I able to keep talking up till now?

“Am I being worked up? Honestly, I'm just worried I'll say the wrong thing and offend you in some way. I don't really have any...”

No! This wasn't a good impression. I wasn't good at this. I prefer not talking at all. It was easier. There wasn't so much stress to it. And your heart didn't have to drum so badly either.

So then why? Why didn't I just walk away in that moment?! If I'd suddenly ran off, then my departure would have become a laughable memory to her.

“A passerby who heard me sing one day.” She'd probably gist about me to her friends. They'd snicker and scorn. Asking with jest laced round their tone.“So, why did she run away?”

“You don't have any what?”

Huh?

I didn't respond, why would I? I'd probably just fumble either way. Like I always do. No point in...

“You were saying something before. What were you going to say?”

I still didn't answer. I just looked at her, gazing into those edge pinched eyes—Brown and bold.

“Hello, earth to Ade?”

Ah, you sef calm down na!

“It wasn't anything important. Forget it.” I managed that somehow. But, her expression told me a different story.
“Really, nothing important huh? Okay. I won't push it if you don't want to tell me.”

Yes! I escaped that one. Now I could...

“However!” She yelled, raising her index finger like a professor ready to give you the announcement of a lifetime. The gulp wey I gulp no be here. “I'd love for us to be friends!”

Huh? E so pe? (You say what?)

Friends? As in F-R-I-E-N-D-S?
Babe must be tripping! Is that how people become friends? Just to ask? So Disney wasn't just full of it? My goodness, It was all so confusing! I nearly scoffed.

“Wait, you want us to be friends? Why? You don't even know me. Is that how people become friends?” She took a step back, analyzing my trembling demeanor. “Well, I usually do, so yeah. It's just about asking I guess. So...don't you, want, to be friends?”

That question. It hit so hard. Didn't I want friends at all? Or was I better off by myself? Unable to interact. Cursed to face tumultuous vicissitudes— Alone! 

I had to ask myself “Well Desua? What's it gonna be?” Unfortunately, I didn't know, so I sighed.

“About what I was going to say before. I...I don't really have any friends. S..so, I'm not sure what it entails. But, if you would th..then...May...be?”

I thought she'd burst out in shock and be like “Whoa, so you don't have ANY friends? Like, at all? That's crazy!” I was thinking it'd be something similar to that sha, but, she didn't. Instead, she came closer to me. And...gave me a hug. My body was too much in shock to loosen up. I was as stiff as firewood. I couldn't remember the last time I received a hug.

It felt so refreshing.

“Well then.” She whispered. “Give me the privilege of becoming your first.”

My soul leaped out my body then, swooshed back in!

Ha! It was somewhat romantic. Probably K-drama jitters were affecting me.

Maybe fate destined it to be this way. And this was a sign from the heavens telling me to come out of my shell, and enjoy youthful thrills. This was my chance. Was it a weird encounter? Yeah pretty much. But, Goddamn! I longed for such a day. So...

“W...well then...Y..YES! I'D LOVE TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOU!” Goodness, that came out sounding so desperate. I really needed to learn how to talk to people. Even so, the smile she gave me sent tickles to my bones. I was so glad.

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

After that day, Moremi and I got to chatting online. Who knew she was so funny? I started spending most of my k-drama time gisting with her. Till, she suddenly asked for my house address. At first I didn't want to give it to her, but thought. Meh, whatever! “Hehehehe, we're friends now.” God, I was so happy.

This period of giggles and indulgence lasted a while. When one random day. I got a surprise visit.

“AUNTY Desua!
Aunty DESUA!
AUNTY DESUA!!!”

I jumped off my bed and stomped towards my door, swinging it open in pure rage.

“What! What! WHATTTT? Ah-ha, do you want to kill me ni? Why are you shouting at my door? Can't you just knock like a normal pesin? Shooo!?”

My kid sister 'Adesewa', croaked and batted her eyes in utter disregard. Gahhhhhh! I wanted to strangle her! She was just soooo...ugh!

“Mummy is calling you.”

So, apparently Mummy
was calling me. Chai.

“So, because mummy is calling me now, that's why you decided to do banshee practice by my door abi?” She squeezed her face in confusion. “What's a banshee?” I slumped my shoulders, hissed and pushed past her.

“Waz a banshee nau?”
She whined.

My steps were so loud, I was still fuming. All thanks given to my sister's annoying presence. A seven year old who's mouth was too big for my liking.

“Mummy,
you were calling me?”

My mum looked up at me. The look on her face...I hated it. “So, you want to wreck my floor abi?”

Ehn?

“No o! is it not ehn..Adeshewa? Just to come and call me, she started making noise. She was just shouting my name anyhow.” I proclaimed. Hoping she'd realize how much that girl needed punishment.

Then the little witch arrived at the scene.

Ofcourse, what did I expect? The devil always makes an entrance whenever he is beckoned upon.

“Mummy don't mind her o. I was not shouting.” One of my eyes twitched. What lie was she gonna cough up, I wondered.

“She was the one watching that her yeye series. It was sooo loud! She did not na hear me!”

Ah, I see, 'yeye' abi? Okay na. If I saw that girl near my phone again ehn. Ah, olurn oba'ngbo (the lord hears me) Her little head was mine.

“M...mummy don't mind this one o. I wasn't...”

“Shut up! Idiot!”

I jolted back a bit, then blinked twice in surprise. Nothing prepared me for that outburst. Then Adeshewa stuck her tongue out at me. Trying to scathe my feelings. It freaking worked!

“I know that's
EXACTLY what you were doing!”

I wanted to complain, but she shut me up.

“Everyday it's this Korean film shaaa. No use in this house. It's to be lazing around. Then she'll come a...and be bringing st..stupid! Report card to me! Rubbish! Boya emi lo bi e, mi o mor. (Whether I gave birth to you, I don't know.) Will you c...come and attend to this girl!? Look at her. Nonsense. Fool.”

My mum finally concluded, making sure to eye me down till I began to feel self conscious, and wonder what I was worth to her.

I'd been shaken to my core. Quite literally too stunned to speak. As painful questions rampaged through my flaccid made mind.

“What made me think mummy would let the 'result' thing go?”

“Am I really that
much of a fool?”

“And why does she
always do this to me? Na so she no like me reach?”

“What was her gain
in mocking me?”

I stared down at the shiny tiles. Almost ready to cry. But I didn't dare, not unless I wanted my mum to give me a good reason to.

“Adesua!”

I gandered up and quickly ran over to see the person she'd been talking about. Lo, and BEHOLD! It was my new obsession—'My friend'.

God! Who asked her to come here? Of all things to do.

I was so bad at playing pretend. So the shock on my face was far too real. After the shock came so much anger. I couldn't fathom the thought my first friend had come to my house, more specifically, the fact she'd been sitting there watching. As I got verbally assaulted. Seriously! Why'd she have to come?

“Hi Ade.” Her tone sounded guilty. That made me glad, she was supposed to be. Why didn't she tell me she'd be coming over? I was so dead!

A friend came over, and not just that. A friend my mum knew nothing about. To add salt to wounds, she was na a half breed. Nothing wrong with that ofcourse. But, it was something that would most certainly annoy my mum. “See now, she has finally brought her 'people' to my house.” I hated the thought. But, didn't think my mum would EVER allow her to come over again. Or worse, talk to her again.

“What are you doing here?” My tone was less than friendly.
She pursed her lips and avoided eye contact. Yup, she must've felt really bad. “I, wanted to surprise you. I thought maybe we'd get to hang out.”

In my house????

“Okay.” I left it at that. There wasn't much I could say. I was feeling pretty stupid at the moment.

“Take her to your room na. She has already introduced herself. Since you don't know that's what you're supposed to do.” My mum hissed and left the living room.

My heart wasn't beating the right way. I was sure of it. Now, it was just us. And the little witch ofcourse. I didn't even have the energy to confront her. Mum's harshness had drained my courage.

“Come, follow me, let's go to my room.” I saw Moremi's face perk up. Did she think she'd been forgiven?

We went into my room. It wasn't anything special. There was a wardrobe, bed, rug, shoe rack, teddy bears, standing fan? Other stuff? Basically, it was a bland ass room. At least it was purple. There was that. Tsk.

“You can sit over here.” I told her, pointed at the bed, then begun packing away my textbooks. I hadn't been watching K-drama. Cause I'd hoped I could study ahead before resumption. But...No one ever believes me. Even In this house my presence is shrouded. That's why I'm called a 'Shut in'.

My head was bent over. Moremi had been busy surveying my 'little castle'.

My hands were trembling, suddenly the textbooks felt oddly heavier than usual. I, couldn't move. I couldn't breath.

Then...

I felt it.

Soft, and emanating warmth.

It was Moremi. She'd come up from behind and held me. It took a while to realize. But, I was actually crying. God, it hurt so bad.

Why?

Why was I on
the verge of failure?

Why couldn't
I do anything right?

Why wasn't
I good enough?

Why couldn't
I change?

Why?

Wouldn't anyone tell me?

I wanted so badly for her to let me go. Yet, couldn't help but wonder if I'd survive given she did. So, asked with nothing left to lose—but a friend.

“Moremi? Why did you ask to be my friend? What use am I to you? Why would you want to...” She didn't let me finish and spun me around, causing me to face her. My goodness, she'd been crying too.

“I became your friend, so you wouldn't have to cry alone. So you wouldn't have to face the world's wrath with nothing to shield yourself with. I became your friend, because you found me. And I'll be damned! If the only thing I can do is cause you to doubt your usefulness. You? are an amazing person. I like you a lot, I think you're smart, considrate and full of life. Life, you're too afraid to show to the anyone else. I'm your friend...because, I want to be associated with an angel like you!”

I quite literally threw myself at her and held on tight. I didn't care if I was being too close, or too forward. I DIDN'T CARE! I just wanted to hold her, I wanted her to never let go. I, really didn't want to be alone. Not anymore. Not ever!

We embraced for what felt like an eternity. At least till I'd finally run out of tears to cry. “S... sorry I invaded your personal space.” I told her, feeling a bit relieved. And ofcourse, she smiled like usual. It was like nothing fazed the girl. “Silly, I didn't mind at all. You needed a hug. And I wanted to be your support. Please don't apologize. That's what friends are for. In good times, and bad.”

This girl was actually quoting lyrics for me.

“Lol, go jor.” I playfully pushed her. “You'er so cheesey.”  She feigned a heart attack and fell back first, unto the bed. “My, my heart! Am I really that much of a cringy person? Oh! The painnnn!” I laughed and plopped a pillow on her face. “Quiet, lol you're such a drama queen.” She bit her lips squinted her eyes and held her chin.

Oh no. Another rizz addict. I thought all those TikTok anime fans were the only ones who did that. It was all 'king Chris's' fault.

Either way, I was feeling a lot better. Ah, now for the question. “Ehen, so, why are you here?”

She sat up and folded her arms. “I told you. I came to play!” I furrowed my brows and puffed my mouth. “Mmmm? So, why didn't you tell me you were coming? You did not see the embarrassment I faced down there abi?”
She bobbed her head in guilt. “Okay, maybe I should have told you first. Given this is my first time here.” I gave her a stern warning look. “Make sure to inform me next time k?” She nodded.

Ah, now that all had been settled! It was time for the good stuff! I threw myself into the bed beside her and rolled around in excitement. “So! What do you wanna talk about?”

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

We talked, and talked and talked some more. Telling each other about our likes and dislikes. And about our siblings. “I have older twin brothers. But they're in university.” Her face lit up when I said that! “Wow! Really? Me too! Well, they're actually younger. And they're still babies.” My shock was obvious. Who knew we had so much in common?

Then, I decided it was time to do It. I ghast know.

“Er, so do you know how your parents met?” She stroked the back of her hair. It seemed like she'd been expecting the question. “Mmm, well, so my dad is Korean. My mum is Nigerian. And um, I know they both met in Korea. During a conference or something. My dad was working with the government. My mum was an English teacher over there. Cause you know Koreans don't speak English as a first language. So I think she came to their meeting as a translator. Cause she also understood Korean. From what I heard she studied it while In school.” Her story intrigued me, it was such a romantic way to meet too.
“So, your mum went to Korea to learn the language?”

She shook her head in the negative. “No, it's like this. My mum is an American citizen. She told me she left Nigerian at age eighteen, during the time she got a scholarship to study overseas. After living there for a while, she was given an honorary citizenship. I don't really know why, but she was. So, during the course of her education an all, she went to Korea. Mainly because she was recommended by the higher-ups. The job was to teach English in a high end highschool and since that's what she studied. It wasn't an issue. The pay was decent too. So, she learnt Korean before going, so it would be easier to communicate the first time at least.”

I was bewildered. So this girl was half Nigerian, Korean and American! Chimo.

“So it's because of the meeting your parents got together? Awwwn.”

She looked at me and smiled. Before frowning a bit. “According to my dad, his parents were planning on disowning him cause you know how it is, with honour and family name shit right?”

I nodded, fully taken In by her story. “Well, my dad didn't want anything to do with them anymore. So he did the one thing he knew for certain, his parents would never forgive.”

I sprung up, maintaining a serious posture. “No way, so...”
She gestured “yes”. I couldn't close my mouth. “So that's why he married your mum? Awww! But damn! Talk about drama!”

She chuckled hysterically. Placing a hand on her belly. She'd literally been gasping for air. “Omg, you love drama that much?”

I stood up and placed my hands on my hip, ready to spew my guts! “ Ah, don't you know? I'm obsessed with all things drama. Especially K-dramas! Nothing I like pass am.” She laughed the more. “What about kpop?”

That's were it happened. The question that would properll me to directions I never knew I'd find myself in.

“Kpop? As in, Korean pop? Korean music?”

She nodded, but seemed surprised at my perplexed tone. “I don't listen to kpop. I love music don't get me wrong but...kpop? No, I usually listen the ones in the series. The soundtracks. I've never listened to an actual Korean song before.”

Her face went through physical changes I didn't think were humanly possible. She looked kinda deranged.
Or was it pissed?

“Adesua! So you mean to tell me. You have NEVER listened to kpop in your life? You're a kpop virgin?”

Er, the way she put it was so unconventional. Yet funny enough to make me giggle. So I  took a play at her book. “Yes! Alas, I am yet to feel the pleasure brought upon by kpop and all it's majesty!”

She applauded my sarcasm. And brought out her phone almost immediately! The look on her face was honestly creepy. What act of villainy was this girl planning? I wondered.

“Sit next to me child.
You've a lot to learn.”

The hour was upon me. I was about to venture into a new part of Korean culture that I hadn't been accustomed to. The journey promised more love it seemed.

“This is my favorite boys group. BTS.”