(Murdoc's POV) 

My eyes parted slightly, I felt groggy, and a sick feeling seemed to have settled in my stomach, aching from the night before. I forced my eyes to part more, my eyelashes dragging across my pillow, taking in the empty spot beside me. I have to admit I was disappointed, the feeling I get every time I wake up alone is something that bothers me greatly. It had the same amount of annoyance as listening to your neighbors dog bark non-stop when you finally have silence. It's so!... so... hell,

I'm just sad.

I knew that I had sex last night, I can tell by the stuff on my bedding, and the fact that I was not wearing any clothes for the moment. But the most annoying trait of all was the imprint of a body beside me, the only remain's of said one night stand.

I wish that I could for once wake up next to someone. Someone I actually want to see when I wake up. But I never could place who that someone was. A true love perhaps? But I think we all know that I am never going to find a true love. I'm just not the type of person they want to settle down with, every girl I have ever been interested in just saw me as a fling, nothing more.

I'm just a fling.

Slowly but surely I sat up, my bed creaking under me, and my black covers bunching up at my waist.

I looked around my dark room. It was sort-of tidy-ish I mean everything had its place but it was cluttered and tacky looking. I had my dark blue chair across from the bed, facing the door and pushed into my desk, which was littered with random items crowding around each other. Such as. Papers, pen's, pencils, broken pencils, empty beer bottles that where yet to be thrown away, bills... so you could say random important things, that I barley pay attention to. Beside my desk was a cardboard cutout of Madonna, my so said celebrity crush according to noodle, because well she was everywhere around my room, don't know why though... clearly all of these posters of her were bought by impulse not because she was Madonna.

I closed my eyes again, and scratched the back of my aching head, trying to remember something from the night before... red hair, black dress, 12 to many shots, 2d... 2d bursting into my room... 2d bursting into my room yelling open up, FPI or something.

I gritted my teeth, I could barely remember the sex but 2d's little skit, I remember that. That little shit.

"STUART!!!" I screamed, getting out of bed, and high tailing to his room, but right after putting on some underwear at least.

I reared up to the door, and banged my fist on it, "STUART YOU OPEN YOUR DAMN DOOR!!!" There was only silence from the other side, which ticked me off even more. "YOU LITTLE CUNT!! OPEN YOUR DAMN DOOR!!!" There was still silence from behind it. So letting the range in the moment get to me, I kicked the door with all my might, and to my surprise... it fell of it's hinges with a huge crack. Showing me Stuart's destroyed room but nothing more.

"Stuart?" I asked standing on one half of his broken door, that I had effortlessly malled. He was not here, so my anger growing by the second I turned around and stomped down the dark and gloomy staircase, my foot steps echoing harshly through the house. I turned the corner into the living room/kitchen/dinning room, and I stopped short no one was here... but the sound of something sizzling was coming from the kitchen... and my mind instantly resorted to Stuart cooking? What the hell was going on? Stuart couldn't be near the stove, the oven, or even the microwave without something catching on fire. He was a big flaming bad luck omen to all cooking food he was near.

So more curious than angry I stomped into the kitchen to see what the hell he thinks he's doing, I didn't want to have to put out another kitchen fire. But what I saw instead of Stuart was much more dumbfounding.

A women with red hair had just turned to look at me, her green eyes in a look meant to strike lightning into my sad little heart. But didn't... just made me more confused. He had very sharp features and was tall but petite. But most disturbing of all she was wearing my shirt. MY SHIRT. NO ONE WEARS MY SHIRT!

"Hello sweetie, I'm making eggs do you want any?" She said turning around as she asked me.

The only word that I could get in before she continued was, "uhh-"

She sighed staring out the window, "Oh don't you love it when the sky finally comes out! It's such a beautiful day! Don't you think so?"

But yet again before I could get a word in she continued making me even more frustrated.

"I always love a good day like this..."

"Yeah whatever!" I yelled shaking my head at the ground, hands in the air, "I don't care about your opinions on the sky! Who are you, and why are you cooking in my kitchen!?"

"Oh don't you remember?" She said her voice just a tent shocked.

"Yes, No I don't care! Get out of my house!" Clearly this was common sense, you don't stay in the strange man's house that you had had sex the night before, your supposed to get out of there as fast as you can before the same guy pops up with a chainsaw screaming nonsense.

The women just ignored me pissing me off even more, "Yes I guess the sky can be a boring subject... know if you don't mind telling me, who is this Stuart you were screaming for upstairs?"

I bite my lip, trying my best not to scream and smack this lady, I try my best not to hit girls because it's very unsanitary to hit a girl, "Stuart is the guy that opened my door last night while we were..."

"Oh," she said not even turning around, "he was... a strange man, I didn't like him. He didn't even look human it was freaky, it was like he was an alien, haha."

I felt my nostrils flare, this women was getting on my nerves. Only I get to talk to Stuart like that!

"Get out of my house. Now." I growled death glaring the back of her head while pointing toward the door.

"What?" She asked turning around meeting my gaze.

"HOW MANY TIMES AM I GOING TO HAVE TO TELL YOU!?" I yelled already losing it, it's not like I wanted to I just didn't want to deal with her anymore, "GET. OUT."

"Woah, no need to get so angry-" she stated walking over to me and putting her hands on my chest.

Which I responded with grimacing at her. Any other day I'd be up for a round two which for if I let this slide we would get to, but it just felt wrong, especially with her, wearing my shirt, and tryin to cox me.

"I said no." I responded my voice dark like a muddy moat, "You will give me back my shirt and get out of my house."

I pushed her away by her shoulders.

... you can gasp now. The fucking god of sex just pushed a willing lady away.

And when she made no move of doing anything but stare at me like a hurt baby I rolled my eyes and grabbed the hem of my gray shirt and pulled it over her head in one swift movement. Making her shriek.

Without even looking at her small black lace bra and turned her around and pushed her out of the kitchen, into the living room and out the door. The heels of her bare feet pushing at the floor, as several different excuses popped out of her small mouth.

Like for example, "HEY!" "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" "YOU CAN'T JUST-!"

"Yes I can," I said with a smirk, as she was standing on my door step glaring at me, I glanced behind at the smiling and gapping boy behind her, he had a red Mohawk and a beat up bicycle beneath him, I didn't give a fuck that he was there though, let the neighbors lose there shit.

she opened her mouth again to bitch at me again, but before she could I interrupted her again which she didn't like at all, "Now I'm giving you five minutes to get off my property or else I'm coming out here to spray you with the hose." And I nodded to the hose beside Russel's dumb garden.

"I DON'T HAVE ANY SHOES OR CLOTHES!!" She screamed, making the growing audience of neighbor kids giggle, the adult neighbors on the other hand just stared.

"And I bet you can wave down some hot guy from the side of the road to help you, now good day Anne of green gables." And with that I slammed the door on her. And smiled slightly when I heard her every angry and sico like scream come from behind my door.

I walk slightly to the couch and picked up the newspaper on the coffee table, Russel probably left it before they went out. I flopped on the couch and opened it, looking at all the tiny little letters and the picture of lettuce... these articles just keep getting dumber and dumber.

.......

The crack of the door opening just about 30 minutes later snatched my attention for milliseconds before I turned back to this article about how this stupid town got themselves a new mayor. I didn't want to look excited that I wasn't alone anymore, even though I was.

"HI MIDORI SAN!!" Noodle yelled kicking the door open so her and all her shopping bags could fit through, though only barley. Then Russel and that hot kiss ass came in, Russ giving me a glare probably because I was in my underwear and Stuart just staring at his damn hand. All I gotta say is, how was he not on the short bus when he was a kid.

(*Starts crying* I hate the short bus phrase but it's most definitely something murdoc would say)

"Hi," I grumbled flipping the pages of my newspaper aggressively.

"I'M GOING TO TRY IT ALL ON!" She squealed, "I WANT YOU ALL TO SEE."and before I could even proceed to protest she had darted to the bathroom hidden by the stairs to get changed.

All I could do was sigh loudly and grip the paper tighter. This wasn't the most splendid morning so far anyway.

I heard Russel sigh to, making me glance up to watch him push 2d who was still staring at his hand into the living room and to sit on the couch next to me, before he went to his chair.

I huffed and looked at the stupid article then back to Stuart my blasted curiosity poking me with a fork, "What's up with you?" I snarled at him.

He didn't answer the way I wanted him to her just said breathlessly, "I'll take a maple doughnut..."

I stared at him for a few seconds before I turned to Russel giving him a look telling him to give me an explanation.

Russel sighed again rubbing his temples, eyes closed, and acting like I was that annoying and bratty child that was just such a pain in his royal ass, "2d got a girls phone number."

I started laughing instantly, because come on when was the last time 2d picked up a girl. But when Russ just glared at me and Stuart turned to me with a dumb look on my face, I started to realize that this actually wasn't a joke. "Y-your serious?!" I asked almost breaking out into laughter again.

"Yes." Russel growled.

And Stuart nodded, his head floating slowly up and down as he slowly turned to stare back down at his hand.

I blinked a few times before I spoke again think of the red head from early his morning, "The gal wasn't a red head right?"

"No," he said turning in his red chair and taking something out of a bag. A book it seemed. One with a light blue rim and yellow letters saying, How to Parent Right. I just had to roll my eyes, and Russ continued without noticing of course, "it was a blonde."

"AH!" I exclaimed laughing, "of course he got a phone number from a dumb blonde, you'd have to be a idiot to find this guy attractive!" And with that I turned back to my newspaper trying not to think about how I kinda in a way just called myself an idiot...

......

Noodle had shown us at least 25 new outfits. All for 'school' it seemed, I mean they were cute clothes, all Tom boy and kawaii stuff mixed together. Quite interesting, but would rock the fashion world.

But it seemed to me that this little idiot next to me couldn't pay attention to her because his damn hand was to much of a distraction!

"Hey." I hissed toward him, "If that number is so important why don't you just call her?"

He looked up at me then, finally. Eyes filling with wonder, "Th- THAT'S A GREAT IDEA!!!" And before I knew it he had hopped out of his seat and darted up the stairs faster than a man on roller blades.

It was enough to make me roll my eyes for the seven thousandth time. Every guy knows that you don't stare at a girls number! You fucking CALL her! Shaking my head I went back to the newspaper, I was now on the last page and now learning about the new Little Mrs Bee of the month, and all that cute shit parents push upon there children. I seriously don't know why I'm still reading this...

"MURDOCCCCCCC!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY DOOR!!!!!!!!"

I looked up from the newspaper letting the thought process, Stuart, me, door.....

Oh

Instantly I looked back down at the newspaper snickering to myself as two dent's continued to scream in agony on behalf of the murder of his door, the only shield that could hide him from the outside world.

It was pretty funny if you think about it. Now I could put spiders on his face like we used to before he heard of the splendid thing called a lock.  

This chapter took too long... but here it is. 

Meme:

"What if they had to raise a child together?"