Fearscape: Part 11 (Bakugo)

I laid in my bed running my tongue over the cut on my lip. It had stopped bleeding, but all I could think about was what I told my whole class.

I had never told anyone that I felt what they feared. It had always been my little secret. Along with every fear I've ever laid eyes on.

I couldn't help but feel bad for yelling at Bakugo. But this time I refused to say sorry.

I wasn't about to blame him for acting the way that he did. We've gotten closer, maybe not legitimately, but definitely emotionally. Even though up until today, I hadn't shared my feelings or thoughts with anyone before.

I've never had someone close enough to me like that before. Still don't in a way.

My thoughts were interrupted by my door flying open. I jumped and rolled over to see Bakugo barging into my room. 

"Get out!" I told him. Just because I already knew that I was going to forgive him, didn't mean right at this moment.

He didn't say anything as he grabbed the blanket that I was laying on and started grabbing the corners.

"What are you doing?" I asked him, and he suddenly hoisted the blanket up and hauled me over his shoulder. "Bakugo what the hell?" I yelled as I tried fighting him, but he had the edges of the blanket locked down. 

He walked somewhere with me, and the entire way I was yelling at him to let me go. I tried to kick and scream my way out of the blanket, but there wasn't much room in the blanket to move. I was hoping there would be someone that would see what was happening and stop Bakugo, but at the same time I doubt anyone would try and stop Bakugo.

"Would you quit kicking!" He yelled at me and I felt him set me on the floor. I kicked the blanket off of me and sat up.

I took a deep breath in and looked around. We were down in the commons area.

Mina, Sero, Kirishima, and Kaminari were sitting at the dining room table looking at me. They had plates of dinner in front of them, and looked like they were waiting for something.

"What is this an intervention?" I asked. Bakugo used the blanket to pick me up off the floor. He set me down in a chair with the blanket wrapped around me and a plate of food in front of me. He sat down next to me, and scooted his chair in. "What is this?"

"We want to talk." Mina said.

"About what?" I asked.

"Our fears." Kaminari said, and I felt myself relax a bit.

"We all want to try and apologize first." Kaminari said, and looked down at the table. "We haven't been very good classmates. Watching you get pushed and shoved around because of your quirk, it isn't right."

"And we want to open up more." Kirishima said.

"Not just to each other, but ourselves too." Sero said. "Bakugo's shared what it is that you've been doing with him."

"And we want to do the same, but we can't exactly word it as great as you can." Kaminari said.

"We want to offer ourselves as rebounds for you." Bakugo said and I couldn't help but flinch. 

"Y-you . . . . ?" I started to ask, but I couldn't believe the words that were about to come out of my mouth.

"We want to be your friends." Mina said and I could feel tears streaming down my face. Bakugo took the sleeve of my sweatshirt that he was wearing, and wiped my tears away. Just like how I had done for him the first time I saw him cry.

"What do you say?" Kirishima asked me.

"Come on y/n!" Mina said with a giant smile as she bounced in her chair. "You can join in on our girls nights! It might be a little difficult to do face masks on you, but I'm sure we can find a way to pamper you properly."

"Or you can join in on our gaming nights with the boys." Kaminari suggested. 

"Way cooler than a bunch of weird slime being put on your face." Sero said leaning towards me to be quieter.

"Oh cause raging because you die in a 2d game isn't dumb." Mina said. They started arguing a bit, but they stopped when they heard me.

I laughed. I couldn't help but laugh. 

"Nobody's ever tried to be my friend before." I sniffed. I wiped the tears away and smiled. "I would like all of that." I told them. We all exchanged smiles before we started eating.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I guess, I'll go first then." Bakugo said after a long couple minutes of silence. We all sat there waiting for him to say something. But he just stared down at his lap, bouncing his knee. He played with his hands, and I couldn't figure out if he was trying to buy time, or just think of what to say.

"When Bakugo was in middle school." I said and he looked up at me. "He was attacked by a sludge villain. It wanted to take over his body to escape the city. It cut off his breathing and his movement, making him completely exposed to the villain. The feeling of it sliding up his nose and down his throat . . . . ." 

I had to stop as I thought about it. I covered my mouth and closed my eyes. It was almost like I could feel it myself. Remembering Bakugo's fear of it, memories can exaggerate but that didn't make them any less real.

I felt something touch my knee, and opened my eyes to see Bakugo's hand covered by my sweatshirt. I took his hand in mine, and he gave me a reassuring squeeze.

"He has a fear of not being in control." I continued, and Kaminari laughed a little. 

"Shut up." Bakugo sighed at him. I laughed a bit at how irritated he was. I then explained the other fears that me and Bakugo have talked about before. In more detail however, as Bakugo had a better idea about his fears then anyone else did.

"Would anyone like to go next?" I asked as I watched Bakugo try and discretely wipe his tears away.

"Can you do me next?" Sero asked a bit hesitant, but he was a bit embarrassed to look at me.

"Look at me." I told him, and he lifted his head and look me in the eye.

I took a moment to run through all his fears, and I felt something on my face. I flinched and saw Bakugo was wiping tears off my face. I rubbed my eyes with the back of my hand, and took a deep breath.

"Sero, you will never be left behind." I told him. "Being alone sometimes is okay, it allows us and others to see how much we care and think of each other. You'll never be left behind or forgotten. You're not unimportant or boring. And you will never, ever, useless in anyone's eyes."

I turned my attention over to Kaminari, and right away I could tell that he wasn't exactly excited to hear what I had to say.

"Kaminari, you are not stupid." I started with him. "You might be a numb nuts at times, but that doesn't make anyone love you or think of you any less. You are incredibly smart, you managed to get into the hero course at UA for gods sake. Not just anyone can do that."

He smiled and I his overall energy got a bit brighter. I looked over to Mina next, and she was embarrassed.

"Mina you are gorgeous." I told her. "Not everyone can pull of pink the way you do. And your horns just add to the amount of badass you are. And your eyes are beautiful. Don't let Bakugo calling you raccoon eyes get to you, they're unique and amazing."

Bakugo flinched and looked over at Mina. She glanced at him, and gave him a smile. He didn't know until now that one of her biggest insecurities was her eyes and her skin.

And lastly I turned my attention to Kirishima.

"Kirishima, you are only sixteen years old, and you are the manliest man I've ever met." I told him and he got a big smile on his face. "And it's okay to be afraid off your quirk." I told him, which made his smile drop a little. "It's okay to be afraid, because without fear you'll never grow. Trust me, I know. You can't let the fear you have hold you back and keep you from being the best that you can possibly be. Though your fears might always follow you, you can't let them catch up and get a hold of you. Doing that will only pull you away from what you want in life. Your insecurities of never being enough, or being strong enough are just bad influences. I've seen how strong you can be, with or without your quirk. You don't have to be alone in every fight, all you have to do is say the word and someone will be right there by your side."

"That was a manly speech." He told me and wiped a few years away from his eyes.

"Thank you." I said and we all laughed a little.

"What about you y/n?" Kaminari asked. "What are your fears?"

"I . . . . don't really know." I told him.

"What do you mean?" Sero asked.

"I mean I don't know." I said and shrugged. "I've gone my entire life seeing everyone else's fears, that I don't know my own. I'm sure I have some, but most of the fears that would probably get to me are other people's. The way I see and feel how they remember that experience . . . . My fears aren't exactly my own."

"So you have our fears?" Mina asked me.

"Kind of." I said and nodded. "My body and mind are built more for handling fears than a normal person . . . . Or purhaps I've just gotten that used to them. Either way it's easier for me to handle fear."

"Excuse me, I'm looking for my son." I heard behind me and I turned around to see Pro-hero Endeavor.

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