Here we have the rise and fall of my first-ever completed full-length novel, outlined in list form. Because I love lists.

1. My last idea didn't work. I need a better idea for a full-length novel. *thinks hard*

2. Hey how about something relating to the Chinese legend of the Monkey King? I don't know of any stories written about that. Only movies.

3. Yes. I'm brilliant, let's get started! I shall call it MONKEY GIRL. *tappity-tappity-tap-tap-tap*

4. Two weeks later: I'm 3/4 of the way through and I still don't know how this thing is supposed to end. What do I do?

5. Okay I thought of an ending, keep going!

6. One week after that: I finished! Wow! I'm awesome! I wrote an entire story from beginning to end and I've got 65,000 words to show for it! WOOOO! I ROCK! *air guitar solo, coupled with crazy happy dance that may or may not look more like convulsing than dancing*

7. Set story aside and let it simmer for six weeks while I start a new story.

8. Six weeks later: Reread, edit, revise, proofread the thing.

9. Find beta readers and trade work with them.

10. Receive my first feedback ever.

11. Read the feedback again, with deepening frown. I'm not awesome. My main character isn't whiny. Is she? And she has no character arc? Sure my ending is rushed, I suspected that. But... how do I fix all this??

12. Pout for two days.

13. Maybe three.

14. Regain perspective. Realize feedback was objective and accurate. Figure out plan of attack.

15. Buckle down and start complete rewrite of the whole thing.

16. Finished the rewrite! Yeah! I'm sort of awesome!

17. Get more beta readers.

18. Discover that I've somehow rewritten the love interest to be creepy. OMG WHAT??

19. Also discover that, with alterations, this version is more suitable for middle grade that young adult.

20. Complete deflation of enthusiasm for this story. My rewrite made the story worse.

21. Creaks open the lid of my empty trunk for abandoned manuscripts.

22. THUNK as the first inhabitant hits the bottom.

23. Whisper, "I'll come back for you someday and fix you. When I get better at this."

24. Quiet click of the lid as it gently closes.

I learned a heck of a lot writing Monkey Girl, so I don't regret it. But I'm still miffed at myself for failing to make the story better in the rewrite. One day... it'll see the light of day.

I hope.