The top ten things that set off car alarms:

1. The owner of the car alarm. Repeatedly. Every freakin' day.

2. Noisy motorcycles.

3. Noisy cars.

4. Noisy trucks.

5. Kids.

7. Sonic booms.

6. People slamming doors on neighboring cars.

8. Cats.

9. Leaves.

10. Shadows.

You know what's NOT on this list? Actual car thieves.