Author's Note: Before anything else, I just want to thank Wattpad for not deleting my draft this time. I finally got to finish this without any more complications. Gah

The awesome art on the media is by @KawaiiPotatoOtaku. I love it so much! Every single thing that defines #ShiKi is there. Thank you so much to the wonderful artist :) --- Though I think you changed your username because I couldn't find you anymore. Bby, comment right away so I could dedicate this chapter to you, ok?

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Spin-off: Because I Love You (Her Side)

Staring at her now empty room, Kenly's heart sank.

Except for the big brown bear sitting on top of the bed, the everyday objects that used to fill up her bedroom had all been put in large boxes, all ready for tomorrow. It was almost surprising how quick she was able to pack up all her things considering the little time she had, but it didn't really matter. She had already made up her mind. Everything was set and all she had to do was say goodbye to her friends.

"Goodbye, huh."

Her gaze darted to the stuffed bear sitting on her bed. She could still clearly remember how it was handed to her and how it made her so happy. Just by hearing Kise's voice through it, a sweet, melting paralysis would fill her up from within.

Now, however, it was completely different.

Because it hurt to even think about him---so painful that she couldn't help but cry every time. Just hearing his name would remind her of his sweet smile, his gentle warmth, and his loving eyes. And it only hurt even more. So much more.

The fifty-eight days they had spent together passed by quickly like a fleeting dream, leaving only memories of laughters and tears. It was both wonderful and painful; an ambivalence that she couldn't change. An ambivalence that was tearing her heart into two right now. Those memories were wonderful because they were like pieces of a beautiful dream, but they were painful because every single thing was real.

How ironic. Fate is indeed very cruel.

She was in this situation once again...

She was going to leave Kise like what she did to Kasamatsu Yukio before. She was going to disappear from his life without a proper goodbye. She was going to live a life full of regrets once more. Even so, just like before, she knew this was the best thing to do.

But was it really...?

Hugging her knees close to her chest, a soft sob managed to escape from her quivering lips.

I'm sorry

Sorry

I'm so sorry, Ryouta.

A lot of things did happen, but this was the most painful one. This was like a replay of what happened before, and she didn't know if she could ever recover from this emotional trauma without her mother to love and support her any longer.

"Kenlycchi!"

Her body reflexively stiffened up with shock upon hearing that sound. She couldn't believe her senses. Kise's voice was coming from outside and it sounded so real. Was it...?

"Kenlycchi, are you there?!"

She remained frozen for a moment, debating to herself whether she should move or not, her heart thumping loudly against her chest. Kise Ryouta was outside. But what would she say to him? If she saw his face, she'd probably just end up breaking into tears in front of him.

No matter how much it hurts, however, she wanted to see him for the last time. Just one last time.

"Let's talk, Kenlycchi! I won't let us end this way!"

Gathering enough courage, she stood up from her seat then took a step towards the window. She peered outside and immediately saw Kise staring up at her. Her chest tightened painfully at the sight of him. His complexion was a lot paler than usual and he looked so distressed. Miserable.

"Please, Kenlycchi... I'm begging you.."

Warm tears freely rolled down her cheeks. The tightening of her chest was almost unbearable as she looked at his face. She missed him so much. So, so much.

"Ryouta," she whispered longingly, struggling to contain her emotions.

At that moment, the sound of the door suddenly opening startled her. She immediately whipped around to see her older sister, looking at her with those same sad eyes she had been wearing for days. And as though her sister knew exactly what she was thinking before she could even say anything, Karylle spoke, "Go. Talk to him and tell him how you feel."

Her wilted heart, on the verge of breaking, had found support. Ken dashed towards her sister, hugging her tightly. "Thank you, nee."

Karylle returned her embrace, trying not to cry herself. She knew how much her sister suffered before, and she never wanted it to happen again.

Without sparing another second, Ken stormed out of the room then sprinted down the stairs. She hurriedly opened the door, panting heavily, then strode towards the gate. After unlocking it, she immediately crossed the distance between them, allowing Kise's waiting arms to wrap her body in a tight embrace.

It felt like forever since the last time she had felt this sense of security only Kise's arms could wrap her in. She missed him, everything about him, so much more than anyone could ever imagine.

And as they stayed in each other's warmth, no more words were spoken for a minute, as though not wanting this perfect moment to end. She was sobbing quietly against his chest, and Kise held her even more tightly than before, burying his face against her rich, curly locks.

"You belong right here in my arms," he spoke softly, breaking the silence. "So please don't go away. I don't know what to do without you."

Gritting her teeth, she forced the words out of her throat. "I'm sorry, Ryouta. But I need to go."

"No." He tightened his grip even more, desperate to keep her inside his strong hold for as long as possible. His breathing was uneven, his chest pounding hard, as he struggled to keep her from going away. "Please, Kenlycchi. Don't leave me."

She could feel every inch of his misery, she knew he was in so much pain. She loved Kise very much that it was actually hard to choose her family over him, but this was a decision she made for her mother. She promised, in front of her grave, that she would take care of their family. She promised to be strong enough to give her father the forgiveness he was asking, and to bravely face the future with her older siblings.

It was a promise she couldn't afford to break.

"Sorry, Ryouta," she started, gently pushing against his chest. "I need to be with my family, and you need to pick yourself up. You're so much stronger than this, I know that."

"No. I'm not strong enough to let you go.. I can't..." His sobs could be heard in the dead of the night, almost like a reminder that there are some things in life you need to let go no matter how much you treasure them.

"So much has happened and if I don't go now, I will never be able to go back to the way I used to be. I promised my Mom, and this is the last thing I can do for her. I can't lose what's left of my family." The firmness of her voice and the resolution her words contained had managed to penetrate deeper and deeper into his heart, freezing him on the spot. "I love you, Ryouta. And I'll never regret falling in love with you. But please understand, I need to make a choice."

Kise knew that she was hurting, probably even more than he did. He knew everything---her pain, her loss, her sacrifices. He knew that this was the right thing to do for now, but the idea of them being apart from each other was just too much for him to take. How many days, weeks, months, or even years before he could see her again? How long was he going to wait until he could feel her in his arms like this again?

She was everything to him. How could he stand a day without her? The mere thought itself was breaking his heart.

"I know it hurts," she continued in a quiet, pained voice that seemed about to break any moment, "I know it hurts a lot."

Unable to control his mounting misery, his entire body shook uncontrollably, crying helplessly as he held onto her like a little child. But more than sadness, guilt flooded him entirely. "I'm sorry, Kenlycchi. This is all my fault. I'm sorry."

Ken jolted out of his embrace, brought her hands to the sides of his face, then pulled him down to her level. The tears in his eyes glimmered like beautiful pearls under the light of the moon. "You never wanted this to happen, so it's not your fault. Stop blaming yourself."

"Even if you say that, I know---"

"Shh," she abruptly cut him off, pressing her forehead against his. She cradled his cheeks in both hands and wiped away his tears with her thumb. As their noses lightly bumped against each other, she gave him a gentle smile. "Thanks for the fifty-eight days of love, tears, and happiness. Meeting you was a miracle, Ryouta."

Kise's eyes widened as he contemplated every word she just said. Her voice was filled with unspoken love, and he was lost for words. What word could ever describe the emotions he was feeling right now? Nothing. So instead of answering, he pulled her closer by the waist and gave her lips a kiss that had so many different layers of feelings buried inside of it. He kissed her so deeply, longingly, his mouth moving against hers until she was left gasping for breath. It seemed like, if they parted, the kiss would disappear like a dream.

Countless times they had their problems, each time causing much pain. But at this point, going their separate ways was the most loving thing they could do for each other.

By the time their passionate kiss was over, Kise seemed to have found a new resolve. "I'll come and get you someday."

She gasped upon hearing that, but she nodded her head nonetheless. When tears streamed down her cheeks again, Kise gently wiped it away with his fingers. Then, smiling tearfully, she finally answered, "Don't make me wait for too long, okay?"

All of a sudden, however, he reached for her hand. He held it firmly before fishing something out of his pocket. After a few more seconds, he slowly slid a ring on her finger.

"Ryouta," she uttered in surprise, eyes wide. It was the infinity ring he gave her before---the ring that she returned in the hospital. He was bringing it with him this whole time?

"I'm only allowing you to go thousands of kilometers away from me, but I am never going to let you out of my life." Kise's voice was strong and sincere, filled with promise and courage. He brought her hand to his lips, planting a gentle kiss against the back of her palm. "I swear on this ring, Kenlycchi, that I will come for you."

Like a girl caught up in a fairytale, Ken once again nodded her head. For the millionth time, ever since they started talking in the chat, Kise Ryouta had captured her heart where it mattered most. "I'll patiently wait for you."

For the first time in a long while, Kise's lips finally melted into a smile. He then kissed her forehead softly, and whispered, "I love you, and I'll keep loving you everyday of my life, Kenlycchi."

"I love you too, Ryouta." She tightly clenched her fists, desperately trying not to cry as she said the last word, "Goodbye."

Kise regretfully traced her lips one last time, a forlorn look on his face, then moved away. "Goodbye, Kenlycchi."

Turning their backs at the same time, they both hurriedly started walking away. Kise's uncontrollable sobs could be heard, while Ken had to stop and lean against the gate to keep herself upright. It was so painful, as if her chest would burst any moment.

Nothing was as painful as saying goodbye to someone you love. But as indescribable sadness welled up inside of them, a flicker of hope began to grow deep in their hearts.

A hope for a second chance. A second chance to make everything work. Another chance for a future together.

A chance to make their relationship last,

Someday when the time is right.