Kian Luis' Point Of View

I stopped my car next to my parents' mansion gate. I don't fucking know what to do, why the hell I drove my car here?

I was thinking to sleep in my unit but I just found myself here in this village. In front of my parents' house

I was about to maneuver my car when the gate suddenly opened. Our housemaid shocked when she saw me inside my car. This car I'm using is not tinted so she saw  me immediately especially the bright light outside hitting my face

"Sir" Dinig kong tawag nito. Gulat sa biglaang pagpapakita ko. I haven't shown up here for almost four months so her reaction was valid

She was holding a bag containing garbage at bahagya pa nitong nabitawan na akala mo'y nakakita ng multo. I lower the windshield of my car because I don't want her to think that I'm rude even though I'm her boss's child

"Kumusta na po?" Tanong ko sa Ginang pero sa taranta nito ay basta na lamang nitong binaba ang hawak sa gilid at binuksan ng malaki ang gate para papasukin ako

I was speechless and can't even move my hand to enter in our house

"Sir pasok na po kayo, matagal na po kayong hinihintay nila Ma'am" Nakangiting tugon nito. Nanginginig ma'y ipinasok ko ang sasakyan ko at ipinarke sa aming garahe

Dinig kong sinarado na ng Ginang ang gate ngunit hindi pa din ako makagalaw sa kinauupuan ko. I don't fucking know what to do!!

Ilang minuto lang ang nakalipas ay napagpasyahan ko nang lumabas. Bumuntong-hininga muna ako ng pagkalalim bago binuksan ang pinto ng aking sasakyan at lumabas. I roamed my eyes around and it feels like I'm home again, like before.

Gabi na pero alam kong gising pa sila dahil kakatapos lang ng party kanina at malamang ay inabangan nila ang pag uwi nila Ella kaya malabong walang makakita sa akin ngayon lalo pa't alam kong dito na din nanunuluyan sila tita, ang kumupkop kay Ella.

Bukas na agad ang pinto at alam kong sinabi na din ni Yaya kila Mommy na nandito na ako kaya naman inaasahan ko na sila sa sala pero hindi ko namang alam na pati pala sila tita at yaya

Halos lahat sila ay nakangiti pwera lang kina Dad, Mom, Ella and Questly. What's with these guys? I'm already here for goddamn's sake!

"Welcome back po sir Kian" Bati ng aming mga kasambahay. Nasa sampu sila at halata ang saya sa kanilang mukha. I'm glad that I'm still welcome in this house

Nilipat ko ang tingin ko kina Tita kaya nilapitan niya ako sabay yakap. "Ang tagal ka naming hinintay dito hijo" Tugon nito. I suddenly feel awkward because of the situation. Before, I used to be her partner when it comes to teasing her daughter but now, what a fucking small world. Magkapatid pala kami ni Ella, ang anak na inalagaan niya mula pagkabata

Tinapik lang ni Tito Alfredo ang balikat ko kaya naman nilingon ko na sila Mom. Walang mababakas na emosyon sa kanilang mukha. Walang galak, galit o kung ano pa mang emosyon para masabi mo kung anong nararamdaman nila ngayong bumalik na ako

"I think I need to go. Napadaan lang po kasi ako" I excused. I was about to turn my back to them when my mom spoke

"Yaya, close the door!" Maowtoridad nitong utos kaya walang nagawa si Yaya Ida nuong inutos iyon ng kaniyang amo so I'm here, standing. Don't know what to do next if I should go or stay for the meantime

"Why are you here?" Dad asked. I averted my eyes because of his intimidating aura. We're not really fucking close since then. He didn't even asked me before if I'm okay or like the other parent's asking their child 'how's school' like that but nothing. He was so very very fucking busy. Umuuwi lang siya ng bahay kung gusto niya. If I'm not mistaken, ang pinakamatagal niyang stay dito sa mansion ay isang buong araw.

I looked at him emotionless. Am I not allowed anymore to visit my home? "I just want to know if my sisters' doing good" I answered immediately, trying to avoid my father's eyes

"So if you don't have question anymore, I gotta go it's getting late" Tugon ko sabay tingin sa relos na suot ko. Alas dyes y media na pala. Time's running so fast

Tumalikod na ako't lumabas kaya wala ding nagawa sila Manang kundi ang pagbuksan ako ng pinto. Hindi pa ako nakakalayo nang biglang may yumakap sa akin sa likod at dinig na dinig ko ang hikbi nito kaya biglang lumambot ang puso ko. After all, they're still my sister, my princess'.

"Kuya, stay. I badly want to go out with you since then. Don't leave us again kuya, you said we're leaving tomorrow right? That will become a dream come true for me so please Kuya, stay" Mahabang pakiusap nito at bahagya pa akong natigilan dahil sa sinabi nito. How can I break my promise to her, to them. How can I resist her?

"Don't you dare leave us again...Kuya" I stilled when I heard another voice behind me. It was Ella, the one I cared before but it was all wrong. I mean, it's not really that wrong because she's my sister after all but having a relationship with her? It was very very wrong. Thankfully, I limited myself that time because I felt something wrong and this is the explanation for that

Earlier, before I entered in this house, I already think about passing a night here but because of my Dad and his treatment, I immediately changed my mind. But after hearing my sisters, I kinda changed of heart to stay even just for tonight

Lack of attention or time is my biggest shortcoming to my siblings. For me, I'm so useless brother to them for leaving them behind. Marami akong pagkukulang to fulfill for Questly and Ella kaya lulunukin ko nalang ang pride ko ngayon para makasama sila at gusto ko ding tuparin ang ipinangako ko sa kanila

I nodded and patted her head a little. She let go of my waist then face me with her wide eyes and wide smile

"Is it a yes Kuya?" She asked, excited. I just nod as an answer. I don't want to cry even let a single shed of tear but I can't help but to let that fucking traitor to fall down. I'm so guilty that I can't even look at them straight in their eyes. Questly suffered from bipolar disorder. Ella suffered from a heartbreak that I caused which is forbidden. And I think, she's the one who's strong enough to handle such things when I'm not around especially Mom and Dad. She conquered all for this family and I'm so proud of her that I'm their brother.

Na kanilang kuya na walang ginawa kundi ang talikuran sila. I'm such a goddamn fucking loser! An asshole who's nothing to do but to left them alone and come back when everything's alright. I'm so fucking coward and I hate the fact na wala akong nagawa to save this family but Ella happened. She did all her best to rebuild what is already destroyed

"Can I hug my twin siblings?" I asked, smiling while my tears running down on my cheeks

They hug me so tight like they didn't want me to lose again. I looked at my Mom standing there, crying and it's like I stab million of fucking times in my chest. I'm so fucking idiot to make my Queen cry. Kahit gaano kalaki ang kasalanan nila sa akin ni Dad ay hindi ko pa din mapigilang magalit sa sarili ko dahil nasasaktan ko na pala sila

"Son.."

"Anak, halika dito anak. Patawarin mo na si Mommy" Tugon pa nito habang lumuluha. Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko but my heart does. Until-unti kong inihakbang ang mga paa ko papunta sa direksyon ni mommy at bigla nalang siyang yinakap

"Shhs, stop it mom. I don't want to see you cry" I said honestly at ramdam kong bahagya itong natigilan

"Is that so? You don't want to see me cry, right? Then what if I say, come back to us so I don't cry again, will you do that for me son?" She black mailed. I can't help but to laugh with that thought. Hindi pa din pala nagbabago si Mommy, palagi nalang niyang ginagamit ang mga salita ko laban sa akin kaya sa huli ay wala din akong nagawa

"I'm sorry anak for what we've done. I know it's too deep and late. I know we lied, I know we make you stupid for keeping those secrets but I'm still hoping. Your Mom's still hoping na maging maayos ulit tayo. Let me make bawi anak" Tugon nito at hindi ko napigilan pang matawa dahil sa huling sinabi nito. She's still like that. Kahit hindi kami ganoon kaclose ni mommy ay may ganitong klaseng usapan pang nangyayari sa amin noon pwera kay Dad na lagi nalang wala

Everything's going to be fine but I don't know for me and Dad

"Let's go all out tomorrow, mom. I'll go upstairs" Paalam ko at dumeretso na sa dating silid kong inuukupahan ko noong nandirito pa ako. And now, I'm back!

Ibinagsak ko ang katawan ko sa aking kama na hindi na nagtanggal pa ng sapatos dahil sa sobrang pagod. We're already okay right?

Pagkatapos ng ilang sandaling pagmumuni-muni ay naisipan kong maglinis ng katawan. I looked around at masasabi kong kahit wala ako dito ay nakukuha pa din nila itong linisan araw-araw

Ilang minuto din ang itinagal ko sa pagligo at saktong paglabas ko ng closet ay biglang may kumatok. I was drying my hair using my towel, still half-naked ngunit binuksan ko pa din ang pinto only to see my dad standing and waiting outside of my room

I was in dazed and confused for a moment ngunit pinagbuksan ko nalang ito ng pinto at hinayaang pumasok

"A minute, I'll just put my shirts on" Paalam ko at nagtungong muli sa aking damitan upang kumuha ng isusuot pang itaas. When I found it, I immediately put it on my body and walked out on that room

Dad's roaming his eyes around my room like he's trying to processed those things in his mind. I cleared my throat to catch his attention and I did. He shifted his gaze from my window to me and stared me blankly

"What is it...Dad?" I asked, not comfortable addressing him as my father.

"You grew up immediately. It seems like just recently, when your cold was dripping from your nose and you cried because it was reaching your mouth" Panimula nito and I feel embarrassed thinking that scene in my mind but wait? Why is he bringing it back?

Instead of laughing, I just stared at him for a moment. I don't want to speak because I still want to hear him before saying anything

"When you were born. I and your mom were very happy. We feel, somehow a light has come, despite our revenge" He added and I can't help but to asked

"Why are you telling me all these things?"

He sighed "Just hear me out, son" Aniya't bahagya pa akong nginitian. I just nodded as an answer, signed that he can continue what he was talking about

"At that moment, your mom and I forgot the hatred we felt for that family" Patungkol nito Kila Natalya. I still just can't understand why they acted like that for Natalya's family. I already know what's the reason behind all these problem but I still can't believe what they did for revenge which is not right in the first place

"You were a year old when your siblings were born. We didn't have much money then but I tried to work hard, so that you three could survive until you were five years old. But nothing, we can't raise you all so well so we talked to your uncle Fred to take care of your sister. And that's when our anger towards that family revived—"

"And what is the fault of Tita Beatrice and Tito for your suffering?" Pamumutol ko sa kung ano pang sasabihin nito. I'm just stating a fact na paanong nadamay sila Tito sa paghihirap nila hindi ba? Nonsense!

"That's our fault anak, wala silang ginawa pero lahat ng galit namin ay naituon namin sa kanila. Alam kong hindi na lingid sa kaalaman mo ang totoo kung bakit kami galit sa kanila diba?" Tanong nito. Yeah, a useless reason. They're inlove with Mr and Mrs Buenaventura. What a fucking shame!!

"That we're only a fucking mistake?" Sarkastikong tanong ko at hindi nakaligtas sa aking paningin ang dumaang galit sa kaniyang mata

"Watch your words, Kian. That's not what—"

"It's okay Dad, I understand that you just made us to cover up your real plan. Am I right?" I confronted, waiting for his confirmation

I saw the glint of shock and confusion in his eyes. What's with the confusion? Is it, where the fucking hell did I get that idea?

"Don't talk to me like that son, I'm still your father after all"

"Yeah, I know. Your blood's running in my veins so what now? Are you avoiding that topic?" Nakangising sabi ko. I can't control myself when it comes to him.

"No I'm not! And don't you dare call yourself as a mistake dahil wala kaming pinagsisihan" He fired back kaya napaismid nalang ako dahil sa sinabi niya

"Son, I'm sorry. I know I have not been a good father—"

"Because you didn't really become a father to me, to us" Putol ko sa iba pa niyang sasabihin

"Just listen to me first and after that, you can ignore me as long as you want but if you change your mind, I'm just one call away" He said, serious. Hindi nalang ako umimik dahil ayoko nang pahabain pa ang palitan namin ng salita. I don't want to add fights with him kasi baka mas lalo ko lang siyang kalimutan bilang aking ama

"Yes, I do not have time for you son" He paused "Before you can think that, I know that is what you will think immediately. Yeah, I admit that I am not a good father and I have many shortcomings for you also your mom because we are blinded by our revenge to the point that we forgot about you but we still cared for you, for your siblings. But the worst part? Even your sister Elly knows this, she also learned to clench her anger against that family"

"Minsan lang akong umuuwi dito dahil kailangan ako ng kapatid mo..." Sa tingin mo ba hindi kita kailangan nung panahong iyon? Sagot ko sa isip ko pero hindi ko na isinatinig dahil ayokong maging selfish kasi alam kong mas kailangan ni Questly si Dad that time kasi hindi alam ng lahat na may iniinda pala siyang karamdaman patungkol sa pag-iisip at kung ano pa man

"What else dad? I already knew everything" Saad ko because that's the truth, I already knew everything since that night

"I'm really sorry for those times we're not there for you. I'm sorry kung hindi namin naiparamdam ang pagiging magulang namin sa inyo. I hope someday you'll forgive me and give me a chance to be a father to you, and to your sisters" Pagtatapos nito. Well, just when I thought...

"Four months from now, I'll marry your mom. I want us to be complete. I want to marry her not because it's the right thing to do, it's because I love her to the point of forgetting those mistakes we did before" He said and I saw his tears running down like a fucking water falls and it kills me seeing him like that so I averted my eyes because after all his shortcomings and faults, I still don't want to see him cry

I'm still having a conversation with the air after he left me here dumbfounded, still don't know what to do and say.

I may not be the best brother, the best son. But I can still give them a chance to be a mother and father for me—for us. And forgive them for me to feel better again like before.

There will be no burden of loving someone like my family because while this feeling, this anger is still in here, I will not be complete

I want to be happy with my family. I want to be the best brother and son and I don't want to carry this heavy feelings anymore so I'm letting this go. Pinapatawad ko na sila...

°

"Woaaa Enchanted Kingdom!!!" Sigaw ni Questly pagbaba palang namin ng sasakyan pagkatapos kong banggitin na pupunta kami sa EK mamayang 6 pm pero eto, hindi na magkamayaw ang tuwang nararamdaman niya dahil ngayon lang daw siya makakapunta. Well, lahat kami ay hindi pa nakapunta duon but we still know what's in there

Dito muna kami sa mall dahil 9 am palang naman at madami pa kaming gagawin bago pumunta sa final na destinasyon namin. Kasama namin si Tito Fred at Tita Eliza pati na din si Ethan na kinilalang kapatid ni Ella

Madami pang katanungan sa isip ng bata pero sinabi muna namin na dun na din sila tutuloy sa mansyon dahil baka mabigla at malito siya kapag sinabi naming hindi niya totoong kapatid si Ella. Nahihiya ma'y pinilit sila nina Mom and Dad na duon na tumuloy sa mansyon at pinilit ko ding sumama sila ngayon dahil una palang ay ayaw nila kasi nahihiya daw sila dahil family bonding daw namin ito pero nagtampu-tampuhan si Ella sa kanila kaya sumama na din sila

Naiisip ko palang na magkakasama kaming lahat ngayon ay sumasaya na ng sobra ang puso ko. How much more kapag natapos na ang araw na ito.

"Omy gosh!! Mom! Kyaaahh I like that dress" Sigaw ni Questly na siyang nakaantig ng pansin ko. Bumalik ako sa reyalidad at tinignan ang tinuturo niyang damit at halos magdikit ng sobra ang kilay ko nung makitang napakaiksi at revealing nun

"No! You'll not going to buy that fucking dress, it's too short Questly so no!" Angil ko. Halos makita na ang kaluluwa mo kapag sinuot mo yan. Damit pa ba yan? Parang masyadong nabankrupt ang may gawa niyan at nakulangan sila ng tela kaya ganiyan ang kinalabasan. Isang napakaiksing plain skirt na hanggang baba lamang ng puwitan at ang pares nito ay napakaliit na damit na kita ang pusod at may napakanipis na strap. Kulay black ito at...hindi ko iyon gustong suot ng kapatid ko if ever. No fucking no!! That's too revealing!

"But kuya, I like that!!" Pagmamaktol nito at tinawanan lang siya nila Dad including Tito and Tita Eliza.

"No! Find some decent dress that will suit my taste" Seryosong tugon ko pero lumambot lang muli ito nang hawakan ni Mommy ang braso ko

"Let her buy what she wants" Tugon nito na mas lalong nagpainis sa akin. Aangal palang sana ako nung nginitian niya ako kaya wala na akong nagawa kundi tumango nalang

"Kyaaaah, I love you mom and Kuya. Assshh come here! Hanapan din kita ng mga damittttt!!!" Excited nitong tugon. I can't help but to smile seeing them happy kahit na labag sa kagustuhan ko kung anong gusto nila. Ayst, kung hindi lang sana ako pinigilan ni mommy ay hindi ko talaga siya hahayaan. Lalo na nung isinukat niya ito ay mas lalong nandilim ang paningin ko dahil sa sobrang iksi.

In the end, wala pa din talaga akong nagawa lalo na nung binilhan din si Ella ng ganun ni Mommy para daw parehas sila but different color. Si Tito at Tita ay pumunta sa ibang store at binilhan si Ethan ng laruan at ganun din ang ginawa ko. Pinagpili ko ito ng gusto niya pero sinabi ni Tita na mahal daw yun kaya sabi ko ay ako nalang, regalo ko nalang iyon sa kaniya

Si mommy ay pumunta sa jewelry station at binilhan kaming lahat. Tawang-tawa nga kami including the staffs dahil nagpacute ito nung sinabi naming huwag na. Ako, si Dad, Tito Fred and Ethan ay binilhan niya ng branded watch, I don't want to mention the price because it's too expensive. Si Ella at Questly ay necklace with their own names engraved on it. Kay Tita Eliza at Mom ay gold bracelet. Sa una ay todo tanggi talaga si Tita pero kalaunan ay wala din siyang nagawa.

Paglabas naming lahat, nagulat kami nung makasalubong namin sila Natalya. Kasama nito si Tito Alexis at Tita Beatrice at ang Kuya nitong si Nathaniel

Akala ko titindi ang tensyon sa pagitan ng aming pamilya pero nagulat ako nung bumeso si Mommy kay Tita Beatrice

"Oh family bonding? That's great!" Parang batang tili ni Tita Beatrice. Nagtapikan naman ng balikat si Daddy at Tito Alexis na siyang lalong nagpahinto sa akin maski ang paghinga

Since when? Tanong ko sa sarili ko.

"Hey Louie!!!"

'...Louie'

'...Louie'

'...Louie'

One word, pero nakapangpahina sa akin ng tuluyan. Isang tao lang ang may tumatawag sa akin niyan

At ang taong yun ay matagal ko ng kinalimutan. H-Hin...Po-Possible k-kayang—

"Duhhh!! It's me! Your princess, Natalya"

My childhood friend

My first Enemy

And my first love

It was Nathalie Chanell Buenaventura???

H-How cou—is it possible?

Yes it is. Hindi ko siya nakilala dahil hindi ko naman nuon alam ang totoo niyang pangalan dahil ayaw niyang ibigay. Nathalie lang ang alam ko kaya pinangalanan ko nalang siyang Natalya at sinasabi kong siya ang aking prinsesa. Hindi din ako nabigyan ng chance na ma-meet ang kaniyang magulang noon dahil tumatakas lang naman siya para makapunta sa park para makapaglaro kami. Pero ngayon, sa hindi inasahang pangyayari ay magkikita pa din pala kami simula noong iwan niya ako sa probinsiya

"Princess..." I whispered.

—°—

END OF CHAPTER 48!