I have never been in a relationship and it's by my choice and my choice alone.
People look at me in shock when I tell them I haven't even had my first kiss yet I mean we are in college everyone's at least kissed someone.
I pretend like I don't need anyone when my friends bring it up but I drown myself in romance books and movies just to feel the lack of it in my life.
The truth is i do want to be loved like genuinely loved and to love someone like that in return and I refuse to settle for anything less .
I deserve better than settling.
So I will wait for the right person for me and I know things aren't going to be perfect cause I'm hard to deal with, I don't know how to express my feelings, I shut people out and I isolate myself at the sight of any small problem but I hope one day even with all my flaws someone will accept me as I am and love me anyways.
I want the type of love I see in books the ones where you can feel how much the characters genuinely adore each other through the words on paper.
I want someone I can depend on, someone I can laugh with and be myself with, someone who wants to know me and treats me like a priority and someone they value, someone who respects me and the people around them.
Maybe I will never find the person I'm looking for, maybe they are right in front of my eyes but I'm so into myself I can't even notice them. maybe one day, maybe never.