I tend to question everything I guess that's how my mind works always drawing circles and scenerios.
I sometimes feel like this endless curiousity causes more harm than good.
I overthink every little scenerio to the point I spiral into confusion and this question always plagues my mind
Am I alive or just existing?
I could be going about my life and I ask myself
Am I happy with my life and the place I'm in right now?
I feel like I constantly need to keep myself and my thoughts in check and make the most of living
But most times I don't even have an answer to those questions
I want to be happy and I want to live everyday as if it's my last but I don't know if I'm doing it right .
Some days I'm happy like the sun in a beautiful morning.
Some days I'm just going through the motions not really feeling but existing like the waves in the ocean .
Some days are bad days like I'm drowning in myself.
Most of this days I have been feeling like I'm going through the motions and not really existing and if anyone asks how I'm doing I always tell them I'm alright cause really I am just alright not really living just stuck in this cycle assumed to be living when really I'm just existing.
That's why I try to check myself most days and ask myself
Am I alive or just existing?