It was lunchtime. Clara and Lucy were next to me. We usually don't go out to eat lunch in the cafeteria. I was thankful for that. For breakfast, I did go out of my way to wake up early and eat something. I didn't want to binge later on.

I took three water bottles with me. My stomach was always so loud and persistent during lunchtime. It's not like I didn't eat lunch on purpose too! The food here was just plain old horrible. Pizza that looked so artificial, cupped fruit that tasted weird, just a whole pile of grossness.

P.E became my favorite class behind ELA, but it didn't help that no one I knew was in P.E.

I was alone.

That's okay. I was alone for most of my school years. Especially fifth... I'm used to it now, but it hurt so much. To just stand there alone as everyone else partnered up. I was the weirdo in that class. Karina and a group of girls would always look at me. It made me self conscious.

"Oh," Lucy said suddenly, snapping me out of my thoughts. "Here's some candy for helping me the other day."

"Ooo, gummies?" said Clara.

Lucy nodded and pulled out a pack of gummy bears.

"Thanks," I said, "I love these."

I hated it.

Lies, my brain supplied, this is your favorite treat.

I didn't even want it.

Such lies.

No, I said to myself, I didn't want the pack of gummies. They were filled with so much sugar and - I looked at the back of the label- so many calories.

"Can I have some?" Clara asked.

Relief filled me. "Yeah, here take some."

I opened the bag and handed it to her, her eyes shined as she took some, gobbling them up, "Thanks!"

I clenched my fists, how can Clara be so pretty by eating that? Her wavy hair and cute fashion. Her thin yet curvy body. If I ate the gummies, I'll gain five pounds instantly.

"Here," Clara passed them, "you should enjoy them, it's yours after all."

My jealousy was replaced with nervousness, "Right."

I shouldn't eat it, but it was just a few gummies. What did it hurt to try? I can eat this...

My hands reached out to grab a red gummy, and it went into my mouth without another thought.

A light cherry flavor blossomed under my gums. I missed this. Eating candy without forcing myself to eat broccoli or something healthy.

"So, have you seen NCT's latest comeback?" Lucy said.

My eyes brightened. My favorite group, NCT, had a comeback with a music video called '90's Love.'

"Obviously, I'm gonna get the album soon."

Clara frowned at the topic. She wasn't a big fan of Kpop. Instead, she liked to draw and watch anime. I told her that if she likes anime, she'll probably like Kpop, but she'll shrug it off. I didn't mind. People had their own tastes in music.

"Here," I said, shoving her the bag, "eat this while we fangirl, yeah?"

"I won't pass out free candy," she said, scooping up the bag, "continue."

I grinned as I turned back to Lucy. She held out her palm towards Clara for some candy.

She ate a piece before continuing her rant, "And Sunchang's rap! Like damn, he's new but-"

I nodded as Lucy kept talking.

Today might be a good day.

------------

I came back home to be welcomed by my mom's cooking. The living room was a mess like always. Pillows from the sofa were lying on the ground, wrapping paper was everywhere, dust and who knows what was scattered around.

I grimaced. My mom was probably too busy to vacuum as she came to pick up everyone else.

"How was school?" someone asked. I looked up to see my mom over the stove. She recently started asking me this question lately. It was nice.

"Good," I answered.

My mom nodded as I scooped a spoonful of what she made. I added less than what I would usually eat. I had to lose weight. I ate slowly, drinking lots of water in between bites, and before I knew it, I was full. At least, that's what I told myself.

I went on the scale. My weight went back to normal from my last binge. I let out a sigh of relief.

"Alright," I said, "that's...that's fine. I just need to keep this up for a bit more."

In the meantime, I should practice my drawing skills. I grabbed my Ohuhu markers, the ones I begged dad to buy me, and started to get some paper.

"Are you drawing?" my sister asked. I looked up. She was peeking her head through the door.

"Yeah, you wanna come and draw with me?"

Her eyes brightened. "Yes!"

I smiled, handing her some paper and putting the Ohuhu markers in between us.

My sister looked through the markers. "Let's draw...elephants?"

I didn't draw animals, ever. I only drew humans, but it wasn't much of a surprise she chose them. My sister only mentions them every single day. She must have noticed my expression.

She frowned and said, "They're cute!"

"You're scared of Hello Kitty and she's supposed to be cute."

"She's scary!" Delynne defended,  "her eyes stare into my soul..."

I cracked a smile. I didn't realize how much I missed hanging out with my annoying, bratty sister. I was too focused on losing weight and tracking my calories.

It was nice to spend time with her instead.

----

A/N: Who's your favorite singer?

I can't choose just one. I have so many haha.