900+ comments on the last part. You're all rendering me speechless. I love you all so much. ❤️

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--

The sight of him made her already shattered heart break even more. 

Her Pati Babu looked so lost... and like what she feared the most, dead. 

She saw the dried up blood on his hand, his face which looked dull, covered with sweat and tears. His cheeks were red, and her heart started to burn, when she realized what he must have done to himself. 

Bondita tried very hard to hold in her sobs. She didn't want him to break more by seeing her sad. But, she couldn't do it. 

Her worst fears were coming true. 

He hurt himself... 

Her throat felt constricted, yet a sob still escaped her lips. 

Bondita then started to run. 

Run towards him. 

Anirudh was watching her -- and all of a sudden, he saw the small Bondita he had married to save. The Bondita who had the ability to defeat anyone with her tarks, by default. The Bondita he had been inspired to train and teach. 

The Bondita he had grown fond of. The Bondita who had become his baby, and in turn his jeene ki vajah. 

And his baby... was having a baby? 

No... she... couldn't.

Not yet. 

She was supposed to have a degree in hand, she was supposed to at least be 20. Before that, he wasn't only worried about her future, but about her health too. 

But why was she running? 

If there was a baby... then running was not right. It was not good. 

Bondita reached him and was about to fall to the ground in front of him, but before she could drop, Anirudh stood up, and swiftly moved towards the sofa. 

If there was a baby... he couldn't let her fall to the floor like that. 

Bondita followed him to the sofa and sat beside him, still trying her hardest not to cry, but unable to stop herself. Her own face was red and eyes were puffy. 

She reached for his hand first, to check his wound, but he moved it out of her reach. 

"P - Pati Babu," she cried, and instead looked at his red cheeks.

She reached to run her fingers across them, trying to soothe his burning sensation with the soft touch of her hands, but before she could touch him, he had turned his face. 

Still, she held his cheeks firmly, causing a shiver to run through Anirudh's spine. She leaned towards him to kiss his cheek, but before her lips could brush over it, Anirudh had stood up, not looking at her. 

"Is... it true?" he just asked her, still not able to meet her eyes.

There was still a part of him that was praying that this was an elaborate prank, even though he knew it was practically impossible. 

Bondita stood up and went to him, placing her hand on his arm from behind. 

He shivered and even moved that out of her reach, causing her heart to drop. 

"Yes... it's... true..." Bondita confirmed softly, feeling hurt at the prospect that her touch wasn't able to comfort him anymore. 

Anirudh squeezed his eyes shut, the burning ache in his heart slowly killing him. 

"But Pati Babu, it's okay --" 

"It's okay?" Anirudh asked, his voice cracking, as he finally turned to face her. "It's not okay, Bondita. It's not okay." 

Bondita reached for his hand, and once again Anirudh didn't let her hold it. 

"Pati Babu, your wound..." she whispered painfully, "Let me look at it." 

Anirudh just looked away from her again. 

There were many things he wanted to say, but he wasn't able to find the words to say them. If he was in the right state of mind, perhaps he would scold her for hiding this from him, then touch her belly and ask if she was hurt, in pain in any way... then hug her gently and comfort her, tell her it was all going to be alright. 

But Anirudh wasn't in the right state of mind. 

And that was the biggest problem. 

He couldn't think clearly. He couldn't form the right words to say. He was afraid if he said anything, it would hurt her... and the baby. But he also knew that his silence was also hurting her. He just didn't know how to navigate through this situation. 

It was his first time being... a father... after all.

So what he did was he finally took her hand, causing her to look at him with almost a sigh of relief. 

Then he brought it up to his cheek, where she had wanted to touch, closing his eyes, and feeling the way her palm gently caressed his face. 

But all of this had been the problem all along. This closeness, this intimacy... 

Bondita looked at him with love in her eyes, also not recovered from her pain, but she had enough time to process this news... enough time to accept the truth. And she knew she had to give him time too. It was not easy for him. 

But what he did next shocked her. 

He lifted her hand and slapped his cheek with it, causing Bondita to gasp loudly, pulling her hand away from his grip. 

"Pati Babu!" 

"Hit me Bondita. Please," he begged her, tears rolling down his cheeks now, unable to control himself as he broke down, "I ruined your life --" 

No. This was what she wanted to avoid. This guilt. This pain that he was feeling where he would go into a mode of self-destruction. She knew him, inside out. 

Now, nothing could stop this, not even her words. The situation was too dire this time. 

Whenever it was about her, he always lost his mind. No matter what happened in his life, he constantly thought about what was good for her. 

The last time... when he believed Surabhi kissed him, despite feeling violated, he was more concerned because he couldn't protect his body for Bondita. That he couldn't protect his sixth sense. The sixth sense that always knew when she was being threatened. His world revolved around her. His emotions, every pore in his body vibrated her name. 

It wouldn't be easy to heal this, when this was directly going to change her life. 

Still, she had to try. 

Bondita couldn't give up. She had to somehow get to him. 

"How could you have ruined my life?" she sobbed, and reached to touch his cheeks gently, "You made my life. You made me."

As her fingers caressed his cheeks, Anirudh again, felt something -- but he pushed away that feeling of love and comfort. He didn't deserve it. 

"Then I destroyed you," Anirudh cried back, "I'm a criminal Bondita. Your criminal. I raised you in such a way that you were supposed to have a bright future... but what did I end up doing? I made you a m - mom? While you're still in school?" He was despicable. The worst of the worst. He deserved to rot in hell and die for this crime. 

Tears flowed down her cheeks uncontrollably, and she leaned a little towards him, trying to take deep breaths. 

"That's - that's not true! It's not your fault! The medicine g - got switched," Bondita cried. 

Anirudh looked at her with sadness. How could he make her understand that the medicine may have got switched, but if they had practiced abstinence then they would have left no loops open. And the responsibility for not practicing abstinence was on him. He had taken responsibility for her future. He had always guided her. He had always taken these decisions for them... and this time, he made the wrong choice. He gave in to the desires and instincts, and he ruined her life.

If he just kept his distance, then there would be no scope for the medication to get switched. 

"And who said our future isn't bright? Who said?" Bondita continued tearfully, "Who said that I can't be a barrister -- I'll study hard and I'll be a barrister. I'll surely be one! Nothing will stop me! That will always be my priority Pati Babu! I promise! I won't prioritize anything else! N - Not even our --" Baby, but she couldn't complete it. 

Sampoorna Maa's words rang in Anirudh's head, and he was suddenly afraid to speak again in case he misled her. She was already feeling the pressure. The pressure to make him happy. 

"N - no... I - I don't know... I don't know..." Anirudh just sobbed, interrupting her. "Bondita, stay away from me. I'm not good for you r - right now. I'll o - only make you sad. It's... n - not going to b - be good for your health." 

"Pati Babu, don't say such things," Bondita begged, "You're my greatest happiness. How can you make me sad?" 

Then she placed her arms around him, hugging him tightly as she sobbed, wanting him to desperately return her hug and take comfort in her arms. 

Anirudh was in a state of frenzy -- he wanted to return her hug, hold on to her, and just cry his heart out. However, there was another part of him, a big part of him, that was worried to put his pressure on her, especially now that she was pregnant. On top of that... what if through the hug he somehow... crushed... what was inside? 

"N - no, don't --" he said, and tried to pull away, but Bondita held him even more tightly. "Bon - Bondita, l - let go!" 

She shook her head against the front of his shoulder, holding him as tightly as she could. 

"Never, I'll never let you go," she cried. "We'll get through this together Pati Babu. Like everything else in our lives, we will get through this too. Nothing will happen to our dreams, or to me. Nothing." 

Anirudh grabbed her shoulders, trying to yank her off, and when she still refused to let go, he yelled, raising his voice, "BONDITA YOU'LL CRUSH THE BABY!"

Bondita blinked a couple of times, and slowly let go of him, looking at him with shock. 

Anirudh ran his hand through his hair -- the one that was not coated with blood, as he demanded, scolding her, "And you... you allowed me to have sex with you? While this is happening? Don't you care? W - what if something happened?" 

Bondita blinked again, unable to stop the warm and fuzzy feeling in her heart, as she realized that he cared about the baby, but also because of his overreaction. She was finding it very cute. 

"Thakumaa said we can have sex Pati Babu," Bondita told him softly, "Until the end. As long as there are no complications." 

Anirudh shook his head, feeling very afraid, and said, "N - no. And hugging me s - so tightly. It's not g - good." 

"I... don't think anything bad will happen if I hug you tightly," Bondita said to him softly. "In fact... it might... help." 

"Help?" Anirudh asked her incredulously. "No way. You're not allowed to hug me! Do you understand? No means no!" 

Bondita tried not to smile, because this was a dire situation, but even through this all, his fear to hurt the baby was heartwarming. 

"You only studied the process of getting pregnant, but you never studied about pregnancy did you, Pati Babu?" Bondita asked, him, half teasing her through her wet eyes. 

Anirudh looked at her incredulously again and said, "Bondita, no arguing. None of your tarks will work!" 

All of a sudden her heart ached once more, as she remembered that she had decided she wouldn't even argue with him again, and she nodded. 

"Okay..." 

Anirudh was shocked. 

Okay?

Why did she give in so easily? She never did! 

"But Pati Babu, your hand... it might get infected if we don't treat it..." Bondita told him softly. 

Suddenly, his gaze turned dark. 

"And when you went to the black market to get a coat hanger a - abortion... was infection on your mind?" 

The colour drained from Bondita's face, and her heart started to beat faster out of fear. 

How did he find out about this? 

"P - Pati B - Babu..." she stammered, looking at him fearfully. 

"Did you... go there Bondita?" Anirudh asked her, sounding hurt, wanting to hear it from her mouth. 

She looked down now, unable to meet his gaze. 

"Bondita, answer me!" 

A sob escaped her lips and she nodded. "Yes..."

He tried really hard not to get angry. Very, very hard. But he couldn't help it. How could she think of doing such a devastating thing to herself? 

"WHY BONDITA?" he screamed suddenly, painful tears appearing in his eyes at the mere idea of the torture she would have face. 

"B - because I d - didn't want you t - to know," she sobbed, "I - I didn't want y - you to go th - through this m - misery."

"SO YOU HURT YOURSELF?" 

"I... I didn't," Bondita told him, shaking her head, still unable to meet his gaze, "I didn't do it Pati Babu."

"BUT YOU WERE GOING TO?" 

Tears just threatened to fall from her eyes all over again, as she shook on the spot, feeling guilty all over again. 

If Chandrachur didn't come, then perhaps she would have. She couldn't even deny that she was very close to getting the abortion that day. 

Anirudh noticed her state, and he took a deep breath, pressing his hand to his head and squeezing his eyes shut. 

No... he couldn't do this. He couldn't make her feel this way. He couldn't yell at her and subject her to the misery he was feeling within. 

"I'm sorry..." was all she said. 

"If you wanted to... why didn't you... consult with me?" Anirudh asked, sounding hurt. "Why didn't you tell me earlier? Did you think I would say no?" 

Bondita's eyes shot up now, red and pained, as she whispered, "I didn't want you to feel like you committed a sin... I wanted to take the burden on myself. I didn't want you to ever know. I didn't want you to ever go through this pain that you're feeling. Pati Babu, I can't see you living like this. I - I just can't!" 

Although he was not in the state of mind to correctly analyze or understand anything, somehow her words got to him, and he understood. 

She couldn't bear to see him in pain. And who could understand that better than him, the same man who felt the same way about her? 

A mother and a barrister... 

She would pressure herself to be both, even if Anirudh told her not to worry about being a barrister. He knew her well. And Sampoorna Maa was right... in this state, how could he give her this mental pressure? 

No... there were too many things wrong with this pregnancy. 

This pregnancy was not supposed to happen. It was wrong. Absolutely wrong. 

He would have to fix it. 

He couldn't risk her life. 

"Let's go," Anirudh suddenly said, making Bondita look at him with shock. 

"W - what?" she asked, but he took her hand and started to lead the way. 

He took her outside the study, practically storming to the entrance door. 

She followed him, having a suspicion, but not questioning him, because if that was what he wanted, she wouldn't stop him. 

But Manika was there, and she saw him drag Bondita towards the front door. Anirudh's face was a mess -- his hand had dried blood, and Bondita's face was also puffed up. 

It seemed like he finally knew. 

She went and stood in front of both Anirudh and Bondita. 

"Don't Anirudh," Manika warned, knowing exactly what he was thinking, "Don't do something in a moment of impulsiveness. Don't do something you can regret." 

After Bondita, perhaps Manika was the one who understood Anirudh the most. She knew what he could do in his impulsion. 

Anirudh glared at Manika, his hand tightening around Bondita's as he snapped, "You knew all of this, and you didn't think to inform me?" 

Manika shook her head and said, "I wanted to tell you, but Bondita was right! Do you see how you're behaving? Do you see how you're acting? Can you calm down for two minutes and think with a clear mind?" 

"I CAN'T!" Anirudh bellowed to Manika, "I CAN'T. AND YOU CALL ME YOUR BEST FRIEND, AND YOU BROKE MY TRUST." 

Batuk came running to the entrance hall when he heard Anirudh's shouts. He had been nervously hanging close to the study, just in case after Kaka went outside for some zamindar work. 

After noticing the scary looks on everyone's faces, he stood in front of Bondita. 

"Boudi, let's go upstairs," he just said, and tried to reach for her hand, but Anirudh pulled it away from Batuk's reach. 

"Batuk go to your room," Anirudh warned.

 Bondita looked at Batuk and forced a smile, looking at him reassuringly and saying, "It's okay Batuk... it's okay."

"What are you doing?" Batuk asked Anirudh in an accusing tone, "Where are you taking my Boudi?"

Bondita felt her heart drop. This was exactly why she was afraid for Batuk to get too excited. She was always worried that his bubble of excitement would burst once Pati Babu took this decision. 

If she could take this decision of getting an abortion for him, then wouldn't he also consider it for her? 

"Get out of the way," Anirudh snarled to both Batuk and Manika. 

Suddenly, Sampoorna appeared as well, as she noticed the commotion. 

"Anirudh, let go of Bondita, right this instant," Sampoorna warned, and she also reached to try and grab Bondita's hand. 

Bondita gripped her Pati Babu's hand more tightly and instinctually said to Sampoorna Maa, in a fierce warning tone, "Don't ever try to separate me from my Pati Babu, Sampoorna Didi!"

She then looked at her Pati Babu, her eyes intense, "This is a message for everyone."

Anirudh felt his heart tremble when she looked at him with that gaze, almost like more than Sampoorna Maa, she was warning him to never even think about pulling himself away from her. 

Then before anyone could say anything else, he pulled Bondita out of the house. 

"Anirudh!" Sampoorna screamed, running after him. "Where are you taking Bondita?"

Manika and Batuk also followed, as Anirudh took her to the car.

"No Anirudh, please!" Manika begged. She had tried to explain this to Bondita too before she took any impetuous decisions that day when she begged Manika to accompany her for her abortion, but Anirudh's impulsiveness was literally on another level. 

In his craze and love for Bondita, he could do anything. She had witnessed it too many times already.  

Batuk had tears in his eyes and he yelled at his Dada, reverting back to how he used to refer to him until recently, "If you do anything Dada, I won't talk to you! NEVER!" 

Anirudh opened the passenger's side door for Bondita and she sat inside. There was pain in her eyes, but a strange relief. Almost like she believed that this would finally give him the peace he wanted. Perhaps, there would be lingering feelings of guilt and loss... in both of them, but it was better than her Pati Babu having to look at her everyday and dying a new death everyday. 

He went to the driver's side and got in. 

"BOUDI!" Batuk screamed, tears in his eyes, as he ran in front of the car. "STOP HIM! PLEASE! DON'T LET ANYTHING HAPPEN TO MY NEPHEW!"

Sampoorna rushed to Batuk and pulled him out of the way, hissing, "Even though Anirudh is committing a great sin right now, let him do it. Bondita won't suffer the torture and anguish that he would make her face at least."

Manika shook her head with disappointment as she watched Anirudh, her heart aching with pain. Why couldn't anyone take these decisions in a calm manner? First Bondita, and now Anirudh... all out of impulsiveness. It was like Anirudh wanted to prove that although he made Bondita the second version of him and she had been taking decisions in an impulsive manner too, that he was still the leader in being daft. 

Only Bondita looked at Anirudh with love. Unconditional love.

No matter what, she would always love him. Just like this. 

Anirudh drove to the hospital, in a daze, his heart aching with pain, as he desperately focused on the fact that he was trying to save Bondita's body and her future. 

It didn't matter what everyone else thought. It didn't matter what everyone else wanted. 

He couldn't let her go through what his Maa went through. 

After he corrected this pregnancy, he would do what he should have all along.

He would correct all of his mistakes, and love her from a distance, until she secured her future.

And when that happened... if she still wanted him and forgave him for this, she could choose to be with him in the way that they had all this time... except this time, it wouldn't be prematurely.

This time, it would only happen at the right time.  

Pyaar chhoot raha hai mera,
Rooth rahe hai saare
Apno ko rokne yaha,
Apne khade hai saare...
Tolte rishta jo,
Chal unhe dikha de
Zidd kya hoti hai
Zidd karke yeh bata de,
Todi zanzeere likhe jeevan naya...
Rishta Tera Mera, Rishta Tera Mera
Rishta Tera Mera, Rishta Tera Meraaa

--

This chapter was a mix of emotions for me. 

Anirudh's in a state of confusion... he's feeling many things at once, and the way this news came in front of him hasn't helped. He was constantly shifting between many feelings throughout the chapter -- from care, fatherly instincts, anger, love, pain, and impulse. 

This has always been ARC... and this has always been Bondita. Willing to burn themselves in the flame of their love, fitoor and passion. 

Remember they are a fitoori couple, so the things they feel will always be fitoori and extreme. It's just in their nature. 

I hope that you are able to understand ARCs POV like you have understood Bon's. I tried my best. ❤️

Any moments that you liked or that stood out to you in this part?

Also, what did you think of the RTM?

I thought it was fitting for the situation... all of the emotions of the past, from the beginning of the show are replaying. And although it might be painful now, I promise that I'll make sure this journey is worth it. It may be a sad phase now, but there's always a light at the end of the tunnel, and this tunnel won't be long. I won't make you wait too much. We are going through an interesting and monumental phase right now. ❤️❤️❤️

Do press star and leave your comments. I'll try to update one more today too.