hi, its been awhile

i've took a break from postin' as you realise

because i've had some family issues goin' on

i was on holiday at the start of september on the 4th and i was supposed to go home on the saturday of the week after that which was the 11th but i ended up coming home on the thursday 9th 2 days early because my nan wasn't very well.

so my grandpa dropped me off home and took my nan back to their house.

a few days later my nan was rushed to hospital she suffered from a mini stroke.

Her voice was going, we couldn't understand a word she was saying, she would sleep loads, she forgot loads of stuff, she remembered who i was and my other family members but she couldn't remember what year we were in and stuff like that.

my parents didn't even tell us because they never do.

i forced my aunt to tell me at the concert i went too.

so now my parents, isla and i were arguing about it, because my dad told my aunt to not tells us but my aunt said that my sister and i were old enough to know these things.

my dad now wants to have ago at my aunt but i forced her to tell so how were we supposed to know if he wasn't gonna tell us i had to ask my aunt otherwise I would not have known.

I keep on telling him these things, but he doesn't listen. It causes my anxiety it causes me to be so anxious and gives me panic attacks.

i was fake smiling at a club i go to with my mates from my old school because i tend to do that because keep my feelings to myself because I can't share it with my family if they don't listen or tell me the truth.