I wish I could be what you want.

Appealing.

Sparkling.

Interesting.

I wish I could be that, and not so ugly.

My countenance is a scary monster;

appearing bruised without beating,

plump without much meaning -

just there.

I wish I could be eye-catchingly,

drop-dead gorgeous.

Wish I had one of those beautiful bodies that

most of my melanin sisters have;

natural thickness...fullness and mesmerizing beauty.

Or...someone that's a stick size...a model body that can be adorned in the art of designer's kisses.

"You wanna fall into stereotypes?" Conscience tells me. "That's crazy!"

What have I turned my face into? My body?

If I were out there...really out there,

I'd be eaten alive.

Because of this look.

The look that hides behind filters and makeup.

The face that's screaming "Please love me!" like a desperate animal.

I want to glow.

Glow...