It had been a couple of weeks since you moved out.
You'd been staying at a rundown motel in a shady part of town because that was all you could afford with the salary you got from working illegally as a bar waitress at night.
You had thought of asking for help from Taehyung, but he was very cold to you recently so you didn't have the guts to ask him.
"Ya, 알바생 (albasaeng/part-timer)! Please deliver this to table 5." The bartender shouted at you.
"Ah, ne (ok)!" You put down the cloth you were using to wipe the table & pulled at the hem of your skirt to make it longer. The uniform they gave you was way too short so you often felt self-conscious wearing it.
"Excuse me, this is your order." You placed the glass on the table & left without looking at the guest.
Suddenly, a hand snatched your wrist & stopped you. You were used to such guests, so all you did was sigh.
"Could you please let go of my han-" The words got caught in your throat when you saw whose hand it was.
"Have you been living like this all this while?" Taehyung stared at you with a stern expression.
"K-Kim sonsaeng.." You stuttered & tried to escape from his grip.

-•-

Flashback, Taehyung POV
I missed her.
I missed her smile, her eyes, her smell. Everything.
I would do anything for her & I really meant anything.
But I couldn't approach her because I was scared.
Scared that I had become too obsessed with her.
And it would look bad for her because she was still underage & I was her teacher.
The only think I could do was glance at her from afar, wishing that I could be closer.
"Ssaem, what about this lavender color? Do you think it suits the green background?" Yoojung nudged me & asked.
"Uhm yeah, I think it looks good." I answered mindlessly while still darting my vision towards Y/n.
"You're not even paying attention." Yoojung whined.
"Haha sorry. But it truly does look good." I bent down & try to focus on her painting.
"Ssaem, do you want to know a secret?" She whispered.
"Well.. I-" Honestly, I couldn't care less about her secret.
"It's about Y/n." My head perk up upon hearing that name.
"What secret?" I asked.
"I was going to have dinner with my family the other day when we passed a shadier area of town & I saw Y/n handing out flyers in front of a bar, wearing a skimpy outfit. I think she worked there illegally. She'll definitely get in trouble if the school finds out. She's always been a weird girl, why can't she find a part-time job at McDonald's or something? Maybe the pay is higher at the bar? But it looks like one of those bars with dubious customers, you know what I mean."
I stayed silent & let her ramble. My mind was in a mess. Why is she working at such place? What's happened?
"Yoojung ah, have you told anyone else about this?" I held both her shoulders in my hands & asked.
"N-No. Y-You know, I don't want her to get in trouble because of me.." She seemed flustered by my sudden move.
"Ok. That's good. Can you please tell me the name of the bar or where it is located?"
"Uhm.. I think the name is Jang something pocha (bar). Ssaem, are you going to expose her?" She stared at me wide-eyed.
"I don't know. We'll see. Thanks for telling me that though." I smiled at her & patted her head.
"N-No problem ssaem." She bit her lip, cheeks blushing.
I need to get to the bottom of this.

My heart dropped when I saw her wiping the table wearing an extremely short black sequin skirt & a black tank top from the window of the bar. I walked in & picked a seat but she didn't realized that I was there.
Is that really her?
I thought to myself as I observed her thick make up, possibly to hide her real age, & revealing clothes. Gone was the pure & innocent Y/n I adored & I hated it. I wanted to wipe the makeup off her face,  cover her up with a blanket, & carry her out of this disgusting place.
My blood boiled as I saw a customer slap her butt & laugh. To my disappointment, she didn't fight back. All she did was glare at him & walk hurriedly away.
Where's the feisty Y/n I know?

-•-

Present, Y/n POV
"K-Kim sonsaeng.." You stuttered & tried to escape from his grip.
"Follow me." He pulled you towards the exit despite your protest.
"Ya, 알바생! You won't get paid if you leave now!" The manager of the bar yelled at you.
Hearing that, you pushed Taehyung as hard as you could & turned back around.
"Song Y/n! Are you out of your mind?! You can't work here!" Taehyung exclaimed.
"No, I'm not out of my mind. I'm out of money. So unless you're willing to pay for my bills & be responsible for my life, stop getting in my way." You hissed at him & went back inside.
You continued wiping tables & delivering drinks for the rest of the night. Disappointment filled your heart as you saw that Taehyung didn't come back.
Why would he care? I'm no one to him.
You got off work & walked out of the bar well past midnight.
Huh.. Why is life so hard? You sighed as you stared at the dark cloudy sky.
"Song Y/n!" That familiar voice made you turn around in an instant.
"What are you still doing here?" You asked as you saw Taehyung dashing towards you.
"Quit your job. You can't work there. What if the school finds out? You'll get expelled!"
"Are you here to lecture me? I told you, if you can't help me, go awa-"
"Fine!" He shouted in frustration as he pushed his hair back.
"Alright. Good night & please don't come to bother me again." You began to step away.
But he snatched your wrist & spun you back around directly into his embrace.
"No, I meant.. Fine, I'll help you. I'll be your sugar daddy, that's what you want, right?" He said as his eyes stared deeply right into your soul.

-•-

"This is your room. The bathroom is outside, you know where it is. It's already very late, you should tidy up & go to sleep." Taehyung said emotionlessly & stepped out of the room right after.
"Wait! W-Where are you going to sleep?" You hesitantly asked.
He stared at you for a few seconds without saying anything, which made you extremely anxious.
"I'll be in the room next door. Knock if you need anything." He said as he closed the door.
You breathed a huge sigh of relief & plopped down on the fluffy bed. Yet, you couldn't shake that stab of guilt in your chest, the feeling that you owed him so much with nothing to give back in return.
Did he really mean what he said? That he would be my sugar daddy? But how come he's still so cold?
You turned your face sideways & looked at the painting by V, which had been hung on the bathroom wall the first time you came here. A thin smile lifted your lips.
Sometimes, I feel like I don't know him at all. Huh.. Where will this take me?
You thought to yourself as you lied down on the bed & closed your eyes.

-•-

The next morning
You woke up feeling groggy. The bed was soft & spacious, your room was perfect, but you couldn't sleep. You kept tossing & turning all night, wondering about your future & especially about Taehyung.
You got out of bed & walked out to the bathroom.
"Oh. Morning." You bumped into Taehyung as he just stepped out of his room as well. Suddenly, you felt self-conscious in your pink rabbit pajamas.
"Morning." He replied flatly & walked pass you without so much as a glance.
Your heart sank at his apathetic reaction. You closed the door to the bathroom & sighed heavily.
I shouldn't have agreed to this. But.. where else can I go?
You finished getting ready for school. Cautiously, you passed the living room on your way to the exit. Taehyung had clearly left.
Something placed on the coffee table caught your attention. It was an envelope with a handwritten note on it.
"There's some money for you inside. Use it to buy whatever you need."
You crushed the note in your hand. Right this moment, your dignity was completely trampled to the ground.
You threw the envelope back onto the table & stomped away. But then, you stopped in your track & glanced at the money.
If he wants to give it to me, why shouldn't I take it?
You rushed back to the table, snatched the envelope & stuffed it into your bag.
Y/n ah, you've got nothing left, so stop thinking about your dignity. Grab whatever you can to survive.

-•-

Two months had passed. Nothing changed.
Taehyung was still extremely cold towards you. He would leave before you woke up every morning & put an envelope of money for you on the table. Now without even a note.
At night, you'd hear the front door being closed quietly & him tiptoeing towards his room when you were already in bed.
It seemed like he was doing everything to avoid you.
You felt awful for getting so much money from him, while giving nothing in return. Thus, you'd never used the money he'd given you. You just put all of the envelopes in one of the drawers without even opening them.
You exhaled deeply as you put yet another envelope of money on top of the stack.
I have to do something. I can't go on like this.
So you devised a plan.
You stayed awake & waited for him to come home. You listened to his movements through the wall & finally when he'd gone back to his room after showering, you got out of your room & knocked on his door.
"What's wrong?" He opened the door slightly, his face stony, his hair was still wet from the shower. You could see his well-defined chest muscle through the thin white T-shirt he was wearing.
You gulped & mustered all your courage to speak.
"M-May I come in?"
"Just talk here." He said flatly.
"Please. I need to talk to you about something important. It won't take long." You pleaded as you moved closer to him.
"Fine." He finally opened the door wider to let you in after much contemplation.
His room was much smaller than the ones you were staying in. He must have given you the master bedroom.
Hearts pounding, palm sweating, you slowly sat down on his bed & looked up at him. He was leaning on the door with arms crossed.
"Kim sonsaeng, can you please sit down next to me?" You tapped the empty space beside you.
"I'll just stand he-"
"Please." You interrupted him & he reluctantly obliged.
"It's late. Say what you need to say & go to sleep." He muttered while averting your gaze.
"May I ask why are you avoiding me?" You asked as calmly as possible.
"I'm not." He stubbornly answered.
"Liar. You said that you would be my sugar daddy, but why are you acting like I'm invisible?"
He kept his mouth shut & his face turned away from you.
"Kim sonsaeng, do you hate me?"
"No. Stop thinking too much." He said, still not looking at you.
"I don't like being in the receiving end all the time. It makes me feel very useless. So if you won't take the first move, I'll do it." You clenched your jaw & began to unbutton your shirt.
"What are you doing?" Shocked by your brazen action, he finally turned to look at you.
"Paying you back." You replied while continuing to unbutton your shirt.
"Stop it!" He abruptly stood up & frantically closed your shirt.
"Why?! Why won't you let me do it?!" You pushed his hands away & yelled out of frustration.
"Because I love you!" He shouted back at you.
"W-What?" You couldn't believe what you'd just heard.
"Do you know how much willpower I need to not touch you, kiss you & hold you in my arms? I want to, but I can't! I don't want you to give your body to me because of my money. On top of that, you're still underage, practically a kid! Have you thought about the consequences if we really do this now? Are you ready to handle them? I don't want anything from you, so don't feel burdened. You owe me nothing. Just don't get too close to me. I don't know if I will be able to control myself next time. Now get out of my room & forget about all this." He shoved you out of the room & slammed the door in front of your face.
You stood there frozen, processing the words he'd just said to you, but only one sentence got stuck in your head.
He loves me.. He loves me.. He loves me..
You kept repeating the sentence like a mantra. Somehow, warmth spread from your core all through your body. You wrapped your arms around yourself & thought.
But do I love him too? Or do I just feel grateful for everything he's done for me?
You went back to your room & buttoned up your shirt. The heat of his body, the feel of his fingers on your skin when he closed up your shirt flashed in your mind. Your cheeks blushed, recalling your crazy act earlier.
"Ahhh, 몰라 (molla = I don't know)." You covered your head with the blanket in embarrassment.

-•-

Thursday came, time for your art club meeting.
Taehyung had avoided you even more after that night. However, today, he wouldn't have a choice.
You cautiously opened the door to the club room & peeked inside. No one was there.
Is he coming?
"Y/n ah, what are you doing?" Yoojung's tap on your shoulder startled you.
"Oh? Nothing. Let's go in." You pulled the door & walked in with Yoojung.
"Y/n ah, do you think Kim ssaem will like this?" She suddenly asked as she took out a pink heart-shaped box from her bag.
"What's that?"
"I baked some cookies last night to thank him for helping me with my painting. Do you think he likes sweets?"
You felt a pang of jealousy hit you right in the middle of your chest.
"I don't think he's the type of person who likes sweets." You nonchalantly said, trying to hide your irritation.
He loves me you idiot. Stop hitting on him.
"Oh really?" She looked at the box dejectedly.
"Yeah. Btw Yoojung ah, do guys usually like it when a girl cook or bake for them?"
"Of course. Why? Do you have someone you want to impress as well?" Her eyes instantly lit up in curiosity.
"Uhm nahhh.. I was just asking."
The sound of door opening made both you & Yoojung turn around.
Taehyung walked in with a stern expression on his face & put down his bag on one of the stools on the opposite side of the room.
"Hi-" You raised your hand to greet him, but Yoojung beat you to it.
"Ssaem!" She excitedly rushed to Taehyung's side & handed him the pink box filled with cookies.
You watched them from afar. Seeing Yoojung flirting with Taehyung & him lifting the corners of his lips for her made your blood boil.
Why is he so smiley to her? Oh shit, why am I feeling like this?
You averted your gaze & focused on your painting.
Once the club was over, Taehyung hastily left without saying anything to you. Again.
You stole a glance at his back, feeling disappointed.
Does he have to be so cold? He was probably only saying that he loved me to get me out of his hair.
"Y/n ah, I think Kim ssaem likes the cookies I baked him." Yoojung hooked your arm & grinned from ear to ear.
"Well.. congrats I guess. Haha." You sarcastically replied, but she didn't seem to get it.
"Do you want me to teach you? You said you wanted to impress your boyfriend, right?"
"W-What? I've never said-"
"Come on let's go to the supermarket!" She pulled you despite your protest.
You got home with so many bags of groceries that you could barely carry them all with two hands.
Yoojung showed you some online recipes & you were determined to cook dinner for Taehyung tonight.
I can probably repay him a little by doing this.
"This looks simple enough." You confidently smiled as you read the recipe.
But.. It wasn't that simple. Two hours had passed and all you'd managed to do was messing up the whole kitchen. Pots & pans were stacked up high in the sink, spills were seen all over the counter, burnt smell wafted throughout the whole apartment.
"Shit, it's already 9:15 pm. He'll be home soon." You glimpsed at the clock & cursed in panic.
True to your words, Taehyung walked into the apartment ten minutes later. His brows scrunched into a deep furrow seeing all the mess you'd created.
"Y-You're home. I'm cooking dinner. It'll be done soon, I'll just need to add some finishing touches." You said as you frantically grabbed some green onions from the bag.
"I'm not hungry." He said before stepping towards his room.
"Wait- Oow!" You accidentally cut yourself with the knife. Blood flowed from the deep cut, staining your apron.
Taehyung instantly turned around & run towards you.
"What happened?" His voice was full of concern.
"N-Nothing. I just accidentally cut myself." You sheepishly hid your finger behind your back.
"Let me see." He snatched your hand & observed the wound.
"Seriously, it's no big deal. Don't worr-" You barely finished your sentence when he put your finger inside his mouth & sucked it.
The sensation of his tongue against your fingertips & the view of him sucking your finger sent shivers down your spine. You looked away to hide your fervently blushing cheek.
Intense burnt smell suddenly hit your nose.
"Omg the stew!" You quickly pulled your hand away from him to turn off the stove & save the stew.
"I'll get the first aid kit." Taehyung said deadpanly, but you could see that the tips of his ears were red. You smiled inwardly, knowing that the incident affected him too, not only you.
"Sit down." He commanded while opening the first aid kit.
"I can do it mysel-"
"Sit. Down." He looked pissed, so you readily obliged.
You watched him dressing your wound in silence. This was the first time you looked so closely at his features. His deep set dark brown eyes, his perfectly arched brows, his thick long lashes, his red plump lips. Your heart began to beat faster.
"There. Don't hurt yourself again." He tidied up & abruptly stood up.
"Wait! I've cooked dinner. Would you like to eat with me?" You held onto his arm & asked.
"I told you I'm not hungry." He tried to shake your hand off, but you were determined this time.
"Please. I hate eating alone." That was a lie. You had been used to eating alone since forever.
"Fine." He sighed & sat back down reluctantly.
You quickly prepared two bowls each of stew & rice, and placed them on the dining table.
He grabbed a spoon & scooped the stew into his mouth. You nervously waited for his reaction, but he just kept eating without saying a word until he finished everything.
"I'm done." He wiped his mouth & left right after he was finished.
"What was that? He didn't even comment on the taste." You mumbled to yourself as you put a spoonful of stew into your mouth.
"Blegh!" You immediately spat it out. It was so salty & tasted disgusting.
"How did he manage to finish all that?" You muttered in bewilderment.