Hey guys, this chapter is a little different. It's not really a part of the story, just sort of how Koto came to be. I was thinking today about how happy writing this story makes me and seeing all the connections people have made with Koto.

The thought first came to me when I was watching Transformers; what if there was a character who's quirk was to use other people's voices as their own? But then, I thought, how could that work? Maybe they'd go to a different school, since with that quirk, they couldn't be a hero. It's not powerful enough. And that's when I thought back to Fairest where the main character could basically teleport her voice while mimicking other things, a trait she called "illusing." That's sorta where Koto was born.

I still wondered why she would need to use that quirk, then came upon the realization that she could be mute. I had only seen one other story on Wattpad of a mute character and it's honestly one of my favorites. I recognized how much I enjoyed the stories that were unique in a way that worked and not everybody else thought of. So, I decided to make her mute.

Any particular reason she's a hero? I decided that if she's a hero, she would need a tragic backstory, perhaps something that even made her go mute, so that's where I came up with the car crash and the incident with her grandma. I wanted a character who started out so low that all they could do was go up. Maybe after time and stumbling more than once. I wanted a character who isn't always easy to love, with slight anger issues, but definitely sassy enough to make her personable.

My first thought as to how she would fit into the story was the training camp arc. The night that I thought of her character, I sat in bed and as I fell asleep, I realized a scenario that would totally work. My original thought was that a villain in the woods was going around and stealing people's happy memories, so they would lose their hope and wills to become heroes. However, that person would only get Koto because she would scream, alerting Todoroki and Bakugo who were in the area. Those two were going to fight with the villain, who couldn't do anything without touching them, and easily immobilize him. As you can see, that changed quite a bit, but mainly just to add more thematic elements. The main thing that changed was that in the hospital, when Koto was all chained up, she was actually supposed to talk. I wasn't really sure why and I couldn't find a way to connect it to the story, so when I got to writing that part, I was like, "but why?" And so she ended up staying mute, which I actually really enjoy writing. It's definitely a test in writing ability to see if I could create a relatable character without her saying anything; just facial expressions and body language. Sure, she uses sign language, but she had no way of speaking with specific tones. That was all based off her body language.

Anyways, after thinking up that arc was basically when I started thinking, "hmm, this story actually has potential. I'll write it out and see where it goes." So from there, I decided I needed a name and an appearance for her. I don't remember the decision to make her Present Mic's niece, but I know it was rooted in the idea that their quirks both have to do with their voices. I looked through a few websites of Japanese baby names and decided that Koto was cute. With her appearance, I decided I wanted to do something that I hadn't really seen too much on this side of Wattpad. Most of the time in the BNHA fandom, I see characters with long, straight hair, messy hair that they just don't care about, characters with ponytails, or half their hair up and "a few strands to frame their face." I basically discovered that there weren't too many characters with extremely curly hair. And I hadn't seen any characters that looked as Scottish as Koto. So, yes, I did take a LOT of inspiration from Merida in creating her appearance. Mostly because if I looked up redheaded anime girls, I got pictures of girls with legit red hair and it was always too straight or too short, so I couldn't find a good picture for the cover. That was when I thought, "hmm she looks enough like Merida. Let's google 'casual merida.'" Bingo! That gave me all the illustrations I needed to start nailing down the specifics of her character design. Of course, in all the pictures, Merida obviously has blue eyes, so I decided to make Koto's the same so that she wouldn't stray too far from that design.

My decision to make her extremely thin came from where I was at that point in time. I was having such bad anxiety attacks that I could barely eat anything. And even on a good day, I was never particularly hungry. As a teenager, I was somebody with a very fast metabolism, as quite a few people are. So I know personally, it's always annoying to hear the "eat more, you're too thin." But something I really didn't expect was when I started forcing myself to eat more, cause mind you, I could still barely eat a full meal, I heard somebody who I really respect and admire tell me, "wow, are you really sure you wanna keep eating? Your ass is getting fat." And keep in mind, this is coming from somebody I would go to hell and back for, so it broke me a bit inside. Not to mention, I was a size 4. I had gone from a size 0 to a size 4. I wouldn't call that unhealthy, I'd call that finally getting to a healthy weight for my bones to be properly supported. I decided at that time that I would've taken being told "eat more" every single day of my life if I never had to hear somebody saying I was getting fat again. Now don't get me wrong, I still hear it all the time as I've consistently been balancing at a 4. And yes, it's always hard to hear, but that's sort of how Koto became my comfort character. She's something I used to be who, yes, receives the same comments lots of other people do, but it was sorta my way of escaping to a safe space.

Now, that brings up another couple mental things that Koto struggles with that stem from my own problems. Like her, I get extreme anxiety attacks, most of the time, in the morning. So, like her, I tend to throw up as soon as I wake up. Mostly if I'm in a different place or situation or there's something happening that day that makes me nervous.

Secondly is her depersonalization disorder. I didn't really intend for her to have it at the beginning, but as I was writing, I was struggling with it (and still am) worse than ever. I'm not exactly sure why, but one night, when I was at my lowest point, I wrote that entire three (and a half) section of Ballet Rehearsal, Back to School, The Fight, and then the first half of Meeting the Family. I don't actually remember writing those, but a couple days later when I came back to writing, I reread all of those and just started crying. I knew that I should include them because I hadn't seen any book characters (in general; not just on Wattpad) who struggled with dissociation and, like I've said, Koto's sort of my comfort character who I like being extremely unique. I figured that if I could bring something to light that a lot of people don't write about, I could at least bring awareness to it and maybe not feel so alone.

But I digress, something that I often see in books is that the main character as a child is like completely pure of heart. I don't know about you guys, but I sucked as a child. As did most kids I knew in elementary school. Children don't really have logic, or at least good logic, so I wanted to create characters that were more like what I knew elementary school kids to be. That's why I made young Koto and Kati the way they were. Neither was exactly bad or good and yes, they both did bad things without thinking. That's how most children are, honestly. They make mistakes and I'm pretty sure that children with quirks would make worse mistakes. When I was in fourth grade (around age 8 or 9) was when I was really the worst. Cause I could recognize that people were hurt or offended by what I did and I really didn't care. Like I said, I was a sucky child and I would like to formally say that I regret everything bad I ever did. But I recognize that kids at that age can be brats, so that's when I decided to have everything with Kati and Koto's parents go down.

I've noticed a lot that people think she was four years old when this happened, but that's not actually correct. She was in fourth grade, making her 8 years old. She recognized that she was being mean and decided to go along with it anyway. I wrote Koto to have some anger issues and be a little too proud to listen to others. So, I wouldn't put her actions too high on a pedestal, as most main characters are. She's not only struggling to become a hero, but also just a genuinely good person. I definitely struggled with the latter myself, but I'd like to think I'm not so bad now. I don't want to justify her bad choices, I want to highlight that she can grow. 

Anyways, that's really it. I was just thinking about all this today and wanted to share. Even if just to say that character inspiration can come from anywhere and it always puts me in a good mood to be creative. Even if I'm not always happy, I enjoy diving into my character's life to be creative and feel something different.

This was a bit of an odd chapter, but there were pieces of information about her that I didn't feel like I could share in the actual story without them seeming out of place. I guess you could call this my character sheet for her.

I'm open to doing more of these if you want to know more about my other OCs. Believe me, even the characters who have the smallest parts have some rather large backstories or just details that I wanted to include, but couldn't without the narration seeming forced. So if you have any requests, please comment! Is definitely be willing to do more.

I'm considering doing one for the entire Fujino 7 if you'd be interested. Just let me know.

There'll still be a real chapter coming out in a few days, so be looking out for that. I was just in the mood to give you guys a little more this week. 😁

That's all for now! Thanks for your votes and comments! They make my day every time. ❤️