I run into the alleyway to see Shinso's crumpled body laying on a battered dumpster.

No! But I already saved him!

I get the feeling something is sneaking up behind me, so I turn to be faced with a giant nomu. I jump out of the way just in time to miss its clawed hand. It growls down at me, baring its teeth.

What did I do last time? I painfully wrack my brain, searching for anything to get Shinso and I out of the situation.

Panic.

I stare down the monster and open my mouth, but nothing comes out. My breath freezes as I exhale, expanding and forming into a thick block. The frost tears at my throat as I try to choke it out, but my windpipe is completely blocked. The ice gets colder and colder, slowly freezing my blood from the inside out. Warm tears trickle down my face and freeze.

I can't save him, I think in desperation.

I turn back around at the sound of bubbling. Shinso uselessly flails his broken body as it sinks in the pool of his blood. I grasp at my throat, trying to find a way to get air to my lungs.

"Why aren't you doing anything?" His broken voice rasps. The blood leaks into his mouth and he starts choking. He squeezes his eyes shut as he finally sinks into the blood and out of sight.

A hard force slams me into the pavement. I roll over to see the nomu pull its fist back. It repeatedly sends punch after punch my way. I feel every bone in my body break and, as much as I wish I could lose consciousness and not feel anything, I'm left agonizingly aware of every ounce of pain.

The nomu lifts me and flings me into the wall.

How am I not dead yet?

I fall to the ground, paralyzed from pain and the ice slowly taking over my body. I'm forced to watch as the monster turns back to the street where a group of injured people is stumbling past, on their way out of the city. I look through the nomu's legs at the man walking past, clutching his shoulder. He turns and locks eyes with me. The entire left side of his face is bloody and practically torn off.

"This is your fault," he growls at me.

I feel the ice creep into my heart and the frost begins to spread with a new vigor. Suddenly, the ground freezes beneath me. I glance down to see snow piling up around me.

When I look back up, the nomu and the people are gone as well as the entire city of Hosu. I'm looking at an icy road out in the middle of the woods. It looks to be about midday. I'm propped up against a tree, looking at a tiny bridge with a thin creek, frozen where it once trickled, underneath. The guardrails are covered in a layer of frost.

A brisk wind blows my auburn hair across my face as each car passes. My neck refuses to turn, so I can't look around when the sound of brakes squealing slices through the air. I hear a loud boom and metal wrenching.

A familiar silver car slides past. I fight to close my eyes, but they are already frozen open. In my periphery, I see each strand of my hair becoming an icy white, freezing in place as my focus remains on my parent's car smashing through the guard rail.

The shards of metal and glass scatter across the snow, making a mosaic on the ground of the winter woods. Suddenly, it's silent. The only movement I can see is the smoke rising from under the hood.

My whole broken body has frozen into pure ice. I fight to stand and try to rescue my family--to rescue myself--but I'm stuck in place.

From down the street, I can already hear the sirens. Lights flash over the car, over the snow, over the gruesome mosaic on the ground, and over me. They get brighter and brighter until I'm blinded, only seeing the cold white.

•°•°•°•

I gasp awake to see somebody stumbling past my bed. The touseled purple hair informs me that it's Shinso, but the rest of him is too bandaged to tell.

I swallow my guilt and the fear still coursing through me. I take a second to ground myself.

He didn't actually drown in blood. He's okay. He's alive and with me right here. We're going to be okay. I can't let it get to me.

I look down at my arms, seeing my pale skin instead of the ice from my dream. I let out a breath, all of a sudden very grateful for air.

I illuse, "did you sleep okay?"

He jumps, shocked at the sudden sound. He tightens his grip on his IV stand to not fall over. When he turns to look at me, I get a full idea of just how bad his condition is. Most of his face has been healed, but there are still bandages on his right eyebrow and cheek. The way he stands is as if the nomu is still holding onto him, clutching the life out of him. It makes me want to cry, seeing him in so much pain. I haven't known him very long, but I still can't stand to see him hurt this bad.

"I didn't wake you, did I?" His voice sounds a little better today.

"That didn't answer my question," I respond with a small smile.

He rolls his eyes and sighs, though it sounds a bit more like a wheeze. "I slept fine...thank you."

I smile and shift on the bed to sit up, rolling my no longer injured shoulder again. "That's good. And no, you didn't wake me."

He makes a small grunt of understanding before continuing to shuffle slowly across the floor. "Do you need help?" I illuse, already standing.

"No, I'm fine," he says, shooting me a small glare as I get to his side, propping him up against me.

"Better?" I ask. "Where are we going?"

He lets out short breaths. "Not in the slightest," he says. I look up to see him shaking his head with the smallest hint of a smile on his face. He removes his weight from me and stands by himself.

He's laughing? I actually made him laugh! I think with a grin, letting him resume his original pace. "And I'm just going to the bathroom," he says.

"Ah, well I was gonna head down to the cafeteria. Want me to grab you anything?" I ask searching through my duffle for a sweatshirt which I readily throw on.

"No, you don't have to do that," he says, still hobbling to the bathroom.

"So what I'm hearing is vegetables, vegetables, and more vegetables," I illuse with a cheeky grin.

He turns his head to give me a withering glare. "Don't you dare," he rasps. I know we've both been growing bored of eating only vegetables at Nyikang's dojo, so I figure I can tease him a bit.

I giggle quietly and plug my phone in, reviving it, then stand and pat him softly on the shoulder. "We'll see," I illuse cheerfully as I walk out the door.

When I get to the cafeteria, I notice Midoriya and Todoroki sitting at a round table. The green haired boy waves me over with a smile. I walk over and pull out a chair, sitting on Midoriya's other side, right across from Todoroki.

"Hey, did ya sleep well?" The small boy asks brightly.

I nod, running a hand through my tangled mess of hair. At this point, I've really stopped caring about it. "Where's Iida?" I ask, not seeing the boy anywhere around.

"The doctor is checking him right now, but he'll be down soon," Midoriya explains. "Todoroki-kun is next and then he'll be able to go home."

"Same here," I illuse, leaning back in my chair to pop my back.

"In that case, would you like me to walk you to the station?" Todoroki asks, looking over at me. I swear my heart is about to burst out of my chest with how hard it's beating.

"But Todoroki-kun, isn't your father picking you up?" Midoriya asks, slightly confused.

The boy shrugs. "Let him wait," he says, slurping his noodles defiantly.

"Sure, thank you," I illuse after getting my bearings.

"Your face is getting red again," he says, putting down his bowl. "Have you had anything to drink this morning?"

I shake my head quickly, standing up. The chair falls behind me as I back away from the table. I illuse under it to pick it back up so I don't have to bend over in this short hospital gown. That would be a whole other form of embarrassing torture. "Ya know, you're right! I should probably get something to eat too. I promised Shinso I would bring him some food, so I'm just gonna get on that. I'll text you when I'm checked out, okay?"

I don't even wait for his response, scurrying across the room to the food line. I can't bring myself to look over at their table as I grab two trays and fill them with meat and noodles and rice and everything they serve that isn't vegetables. Then, just for a laugh, I grab a small dish of broccoli and add it to Shinso's tray.

I balance the trays as I make my way back to our room. When I open the door, I notice the curtain has been drawn back, letting light come into my side from the window. Shinso is back in his bed, staring at his phone. He looks up when I enter. "It was a little dark on your side," he says quietly, obviously still having trouble breathing.

He was probably nervous for me to see his condition too. At least we can keep the room open now.

I nod and place his tray down on his bedside table. He looks at it, unamused before lifting the bowl of broccoli accusingly.

"Big, strong heroes eat vegetables," I illuse in my best mom voice.

"Then where's yours?" He sneers.

"Look at me! Do you think I'll ever be big and strong? Eat up!" I go back to my bed, digging into my food as I try to process my dream. He frowns, but doesn't respond.

By the time I finish the small amount of food on my tray, I feel lethargic and, surprisingly, missing vegetables. I look over to see Shinso has moved the bowl of broccoli off to the side, untouched. I illuse a small noise below one piece and lift it.

"The hell?" Shinso says through a mouthful of rice as I fly the broccoli over to me and drop it into my mouth. I smile triumphantly as I chew.

"Koto Yamada?" A voice calls out from the doorway. The same doctor from yesterday is peeking her head in. I nod and she continues, "it's time for your final check up." I nod and take off my sweatshirt, following after her.

She has me sit down on the examination table and closes the door behind her. "So, you are selectively mute?" She asks, to which I nod. "And this was after a traumatic incident six years ago?" I nod again. I try to suppress a shudder at the memory of my dream.

She glances down at her clipboard. "I'm sure you're aware that you sustained no injury to your vocal chords, nor your brain, so you therefore have the ability to speak." My hands start shaking, but I nod once more.

And yet I can't. How messed up do I have to be to still not be over this?

On one hand, I like being silent, but on the other, I hate that I feel like I'm broken.

The doctor sits down on her stool and levels me with her soft gaze. "I understand that it might be frustrating for you, but the trauma can affect how long this mental ailment will last. I can't offer official advice, seeing as I am not licensed to do so, but I contacted a friend in the psychological field. He sent me this."

She unclips a thin packet of paper from the clipboard and hands it to me. It appears to be a report on selective muteness.

"It is, after all, an anxiety disorder. Nobody can really say what will work for each specific person, but finding a way to be comfortable with yourself and those around you is a good starting point. There is a lot of good information in there that I recommend reading through and discussing with a licensed psychologist if you would like to take some steps in combating this. It is your choice, but I would still like to provide you with some resources."

She gives me a thin lipped smile and puts down her clipboard. "I know the hero, Recovery Girl, has been in to heal you, so let's take a look at that joint."

After testing how my shoulder is holding up and checking all my vitals, she says I'm good to go as she reaches up to take off the bandages from my neck. I let her, trying to think up a way to hide my scar from Shinso when I get back to the room.

Ultimately, when I enter the room again, I immediately duck my head and pick up my duffle bag, shoving the packet of paper in before he can see it. "I can finally get out of this stupid hospital gown," I illuse, not looking at the boy as I walk hastily to the bathroom.

I thank every higher being that my usual choker is still in here where I left it. I pull off the wrinkled gown and take a shower as quick as humanly possible, using the cheap soap the hospital provides. I pat myself dry with a thin towel and put on some leggings and a pale pink loose t-shirt. I let out a breath of relief as I clasp the necklace around my neck.

I finally bring myself to look in the mirror. I don't look entirely terrible, just exhausted. I do my hair quickly in tight braids and step out of the bathroom.

"So you're heading back, then?" Shinso asks, glancing at me as I walk into our shared room.

I nod, fully ready to get back into work. Just sitting around has made me antsy. I collect all of my stuff, packing it up and doing a once over of the room. It's not like I spread out that much in my brief stay.

"Don't get too good at sword fighting while I'm gone," Shinso says, monotoned, as if nothing has changed at all.

I smirk and illuse, "no promises," before walking out.

In the hallway, I take out my phone and text Mic.

Me: You here?

Mic: In the lobby

Me: Omw

When I get to the lobby, Mic has just handed over the clipboard with my papers. He sends me a quick thumbs up under the desk, indicating I've been checked out. He can't outright say anything when there are so many people in the waiting room. I walk out of the hospital, just behind him. We sit on a bench right outside.

"You need a ride to the station, little listener?" He asks.

I shake my head. "No, I'm good to walk there by myself. Kinda want to stretch my legs after all that," I sign.

"Then I'll see you in a few days, kiddo! Stay safe!" He stands and puts a hand on my head as he leaves to get to his car.

I wave him off, then send a text to Todoroki.

Me: I'm out front

It says he read the message, but he doesn't respond. I look up at the bright blue sky, noticing the differences in the skyline when it's not covered in smoke and flames. I sigh, thinking, yet another place where there is too much light pollution to see the stars.

"Are you ready?" I jump at the sound of Todoroki's voice next to me. I nod, standing and slinging my bag over my shoulder. After a moment of just standing there awkwardly, we begin walking down the street. I can't help but notice out of the corner of my eye how good he looks in his white t-shirt and open black button down.

I will my heartbeat to calm down, frustrated at my own thoughts.

"So you're healed enough to resume your training?" Todoroki asks after a moment.

I nod, but then realized he's not looking at me, so I illuse, "yeah, I'm good to go. You as well?" Gosh, I sound so formal. Calm down!

"I could have gone home last night, but I requested a check up time this morning so I would have to stay the night. I have to thank you for allowing me to prolong my return."

Ah, so I'm an excuse to not go home to his father. Not exactly what I was hoping for, I think with a heart wrenching feeling.

"You're welcome," I illuse. "I guess 24/7 training with your father isn't ideal, then?"

"He's the only one who can help me control the fire half of my quirk," he says, with a hint of mild frustration. After a moment, he continues, "I guess you're training more...unprecedented ways of utilizing your quirk."

I stifle a small laugh and respond, "yeah yeah, you say unprecedented, I say fun."

"My father would never allow something that didn't focus on normal hero work," he says, looking down at the ground as we walk. After a moment, he says softly, "you looked like you were happy."

I sigh, looking over at him with a smile as I remember my big dancing performance a few days ago. "Yeah, I was."

He glances over at me briefly and nods. "How long have you been dancing?"

He's actually carrying on a conversation with me!!! I think, trying to hold back a squeal. "By myself, probably since I could stand, but I started taking ballet lessons when I was 3. All the other classes came after. Jazz, tap, hip hop, ballroom..."

"You had a busy childhood," he observes. I laugh and nod in agreement. "My mother would teach me and my siblings ballroom dances when my father wasn't home. It was so long ago though, I'm sure I don't remember how to."

Oh, what I would give to see that, I think wistfully. Maybe someday I can convince him to dance. I mean, if I could convince Bakugo to, I'm sure I could get anyone to. Plus, this is going well so far.

"So if you had such a busy schedule, when did you practice with your quirk?" He asks.

I pause, then illuse, "I never really trained with it if that's what you're asking. I just played around with it whenever I was bored. I tended to use it as a voice for my imaginary friend."

"Imaginary friend?" He asks, squinting his eyes.

"Yeah, someone to talk to and keep me company when I was alone," I explain, but he still looks confused. "You didn't ever pretend to talk to a friend when you were alone?"

"No," he says in his usual even tone, "I never had friends."

I nearly trip over my feet as I come to the realization that this boy has never experienced a lot of things about a normal childhood. All I want to do right now is give him a big hug, but I know it would probably make him uncomfortable, so I hold myself back.

"I suppose your quirk didn't really require as much training as mine did. Mine could have been catastrophic had it not been practiced," he says, not seeming to realize my shock at his previous statement.

"That's what you think," I illuse, looking down sadly. I think of the sight of the car slamming into the guardrail. The memory of the dream makes me shake. I feel my eyes well up, but I force the tears back.

"I'm sorry, have I offended you in some way?" He asks, looking down at my face. I look up to meet his beautiful eyes.

"No, no. I'm just... I've done a lot of damage with my quirk. I think about it a lot," I wave him off, breaking eye contact.

He looks forward again as well. "Then maybe that's just what my father wanted me to think. So that maybe some part of me thought he was justified," he says solemnly as we approach the train station.

"Thanks for walking with me," I illuse as we stop by the entrance.

"No problem," he responds. "I'm sure my father will be sufficiently angry by now. He's not a very patient man."

That's right. He's just here to pass the time. I'm just an excuse to make his father angry.

"I think I will try that imaginary friend idea," he says earnestly, looking off into the distance. "It seems like a good way to keep myself company."

I look at him, mildly bewildered. "Look, I'm not saying to not do that, but...just remember that you have real friends too."

He returns his gaze to me. "Do I?"

"...You don't know?"

"How do I tell?"

Jeez I just want to give him a hug so bad. What even is this conversation anymore?

"Well...you would spend your free time talking with them or hanging out. Maybe the people you eat lunch with or do stuff out of school with. I guess it's just whoever you feel comfortable enough with to talk about your feelings and secrets and all that. I'm not exactly the best person to ask about it. I don't have a lot of friends," I explain. "At least, I didn't until I joined this class."

He asks, eyebrows furrowed, "so, are we friends?"

My heart thuds dangerously against my chest. "We can be if you want," I illuse with a small smile.

However, this doesn't seem to have the effect I was hoping for. His eyebrows raise, almost nervously. "I have to decide that?"

I can't help but laugh at his reaction, even though I still feel bad that he's so confused. "No, it's a mutual decision."

"Ah," he seems to relax at this information, though he still looks a bit apprehensive. He glances away from me and back again, almost shyly. It makes my heart melt to see him like this. He's so precious.

"I'd like to be friends if you want," I illuse, smiling warmly at him.

This seems to be what he was waiting for to fully relax. "Sure."

Oh, he's so straightforward. This will be an adventure.

"So what happens now? Is there some way we're supposed to act?" He asks.

"You only act how you feel comfortable," I explain.

He nods, "okay," but he still appears somewhat apprehensive.

I swallow my nerves and pat him on the shoulder. "It'll get easier, but right now, I need to catch a train."

He nods, motioning for me to go ahead. "Then I'll see you in class."

Before I can stop myself, I rush forward and throw my arms around him. He stumbles back as I start to panic. What am I doing? Abort mission! Abort mission! I push myself away from his muscled chest and run into the station. "See you in class!" I illuse behind me, not looking back so he doesn't see my burning face.

That was such a mistake. What the hell did I do that for? He didn't even hug me back! This sucks! I start to feel tears pouring down my face in embarrassment. Ugh, and now I'm crying like an idiot.

I find my way to my platform and take a seat to wait for my train, wiping at my eyes. How could I ruin things so quickly after they started going okay? How stupid do I have to be to ruin everything I touch?!

------Author's Note------

Hey guys!

I really appreciate all the support I'm getting for this story. It warms my heart to see your votes and comments. I was astounded to see that it hit 10k reads! I never really expected this story to go anywhere, so thank you guys who've stuck with it!

It's been a weird couple of days lately. Things have been odd. But whenever I feel like everything's going off the rails, I listen to this song, Rainbow Connection, and it makes me feel better. It's so hopeful it almost hurts, but it really gets me thinking.

Here's to better days ahead!