Ethan

The park, a nice calming place after a long day. Nobody usually comes. And it's a fine place to write and unleash creativity.

I am very different from everyone else... I have major social anxiety which makes me to nervous to speak. So I am selectively mute. I mean my anxiety wasn't selective but I could talk but not to anyone. So since I have the ability I just can't use it, it's selective...

Why did this start? Because I was always bullied in elementary school... When I was about 9-10 I barely talked. Which led to no talking at all. During highschool I was teased by kids and the adults tried to force me to talk.

I only had 2 friends... Mark and Tyler... They stayed by my side since middle school. Which was one of my worst years.

New people. Nobody accepted me. And I couldn't fit in. Mark became my best friend first then he introduced me to Tyler. We all became friends. But they didn't know someone bullied me... God. Was. I. Tired. Of. Everything.

The dude who bullied me not pointing fingers but he was blonde, blue eyes, most popular kid.

He teased me, hit me. Tried controlling me... In highschool he actually -... Ok maybe I shouldn't go there, but what I'm trying to say is that he was not a good guy. He was exactly the opposite in fact. He called me names, hurt me, and something else...

But since Mark and Tyler were with me, I was a lot better. I had someone to sit with at lunch and someone to hang out with. And someone's house to go to.

But now years later, I live in a small town with Mark and Tyler. And I have completely given up on trying to use my voice around them...

I'm not used to talking but I don't think I'd be as nervous about it anymore. I just don't want to say anything and have them expect that I can now talk or something. Or say something wrong and have them hate me...