"Can't I?" Kyungsoo sunbae asks

"No.. I mean... of course, you can. Please use my bed. I will sleep on couch"

"Ehh... how can I do that? We are both men... let's sleep together. We can talk the whole night. Right?"

"Imm sure"

I shouldn't be... worry about him right?
Either way, someone will definitely be there beside him.
He's loved by so many people anyway.
And, I believe Sehun won't do such thing.
Sehun won't leave him.

"Chanyeol?"

"Aww. Nae?"

"Should I help you wash the dishes? You are spacing out again"

"No no... I will do it"

"Can I play some song?"

"Sure sunbae"

"It's kyungsoo... and what song are you currently into?"

"Hmm... it would be Jet Lag by Exo-SC"

"Ahh... I know it. Chanyeol ya... you are so easy to guess even from your favourite song"

Easy to guess huh....

'If it was Seoul
I would be in a taxi.. Speeding to your door front I wait to go there
I really want to hug you...' - Jet Lag lyric

Think back, me and him didn't get to take a single photo.
Ah, only the one back in Jeju museum opening.
He used to put him and Sehun's photo on the table.
May be I should have known that.... Sehun was his final choice

With all messed up thoughts, I finish washing dishes and see Kyungsoo sunbae sitting in living room playing songs

"Want to rest now?" I ask

"Eh.. isn't it too early? Don't you want to treat me some wine?"

"Why not?" I say and bring wine bottle and cups And go sit beside him

"Did you happen to make you stress more?" He asks

"No.. why?"

"I don't know. You seem to space out more after I mentioned his name"

"No... here" I give him a cup "Cheers" I say and we give a toast

"A toast for what? Our first night?" Kyungsoo says

"You always say jokes with  a sincere look on your face. People might take it for real"

"But I'm sincere right now. Can't we call this our first night? We are going out anyway"

"Right... is that mean we are dating?"

"Haha... of course. That's why... use me to forget things... or people ... or feelings or... even a person"

"What if you get hurt?"

Second time I ask him....

He moves towards me and lean his small body in my chest.

"That's okay."

"All I think from the morning where I open my eyes till the night where I finally close my eyes... is him. And he might still appear as a nightmare.

Will you be really okay?"

"Well, my duty is to make you forget. Remember?"

He looks up me... too... close...
our faces... are close...

"Actually ... I am very bad with relationships and ...  flirting" he says "because I look too... emotionless"

He's saying yet.... I feel like he's a master of flirting
His face features are a total opposite from .... baekhyun
Even tho they have short and small figures,

Sunbae has wide eyes... thick lips... small body but... normal body.. not too chubby but not too thin too.
B...he's has this small eyes but... I wonder how those eyes sparkle... thin lips... and very thin body.

They are just... too different.

"You are thinking about him again.. right?" He asks

"It happens always"

He slightly lean into my face and kisses me on my cheek

"Today is the start so this is all for today." He says "let's go to bed shall we? I'm sleepy"

"Sure.."

It's .... awkward for me to think of my sunbae  is approaching me in this way.
May be I will get use to it right?

Once again..... I would think about you, B.

Even if it's for nothing, I would still think of you, compare you with people I'm meeting. You set the bar so high and you are very on different level of my feelings that..... other people can't seem to win my heart.

What would you say if you were here?
It's good to see that I'm moving on?
Bet you would really say that.

—————————————————-

Next morning, I wake up but, sunbae already went back with a note left ...

'I don't want to wake you since you are sleeping like a baby. Rest well and We have Grand Bell Awards. You are also nominated so, good luck.. see you this evening'

Film Award huh.... i ako most forget that schedule.
I need to get there around 3pm for makeup and stuffs
Urgh.. I don't want to go..

Or should I be .... greedy?
To win awards and ... no be very popular?
I sometime wonder what I am doing and why I am walking the path of actor...

May be the hate and anger from what Sehun's father told me that day may be.

Those words make me work hard and...make me become who I am today.
May be I should thanks to him.

I go out to the dining and see kyungsoo sunbae prepared breakfast for me

I sigh and "this sunbae is really something huh...."

May be I should give a try with kyungsoo sunbae.
Right?
I cannot be clinging to the past.

.
.
.
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.
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.
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.
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All the line up and waiting in changing room is really a sickening

"Why are you sulking?" Kyungsoo sunbae asks

"Because I want to go home"

"What are you? A kindergarten kid? Haha"

"I'm tired already"

"Bare for next 5 hours"

"Huuuu... yeah"

"Wanna invite me to your place again?" Sunbae asks

"I'm ... fine tho"

"Okay.. we will have wine party again at your house tonight" he says "I have a wine present for you"

"Eh... it's okay. I have many"

"Just accept mine"

"Thank you kyungsoo sunbae"

"No worries.. and good luck chanyeol ya"

"You too sunbae"

............................
Later on, it's my turn to walk on red carpet and later kyungsoo sunbae

I go inside the hall and find my seat.... thanks god kyungsoo sunbae's seat is beside mine .

I take my seat and wait for sunbae.
I greet those senior Actors and Actresses as they come in and take seat around me.
Kyungsoo also arrives.

"Awkward already?" He asks

"Imm.. very"

"By the way... chanyeol ya..."

"Hmm?"

"That's....... se...."

While sunbae is saying... my eyes fix to one place....

"Oh Sehun?" I mumble

"Yess.. I was saying... oh Sehun is here" kyungsoo whispers into my ears

He walks in and.... we both finally see each other.
He's back in Korea? So..... how about him?

Sehun's seat is quite far from me and kyungsoo sunbae

"Oh Sehun huh... no wonder he's a player with that handsome face" kyungsoo sunbae says

Should I ask him? If... if he also saw ... baekhyun..

"I only saw Oh Sehun.." kyungsoo sunbae says and.... my eyes widen... "in case you are wondering if I also saw B"

"..... sunbae.."

"I told you right? You are so easy to read"

I'm really... surprised...
He is so smart... I thought I actually spoke out...

"Relax... cameras are everywhere" sunbae says

I sit back and try to cool down myself...
I wonder... if... he's back...

Let's not care.... let's not...

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Hello guys! Here's an update for today.
Sorry for quite long chapter.
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Enjoy!! Love you all😍