Song^ So Small by Carrie Underwood

"Therese?"

I couldn't move. It felt like a weight was on my body and it was pushing me down every time I tried to move around.

"Baby, please wake up,"

That voice. It sounded so familiar, yet so foreign.

I still couldn't move. Everything hurt. My head was pounding, my body ached and my shoulder was hurting. I don't understand what was going on but I needed to try to move.

I opened my eyes first and my vision was blurry. I blinked a few times until they finally focused and I was met by a pair of blue eyes staring down at me.

"Thank God!" she leaned down and kissed my forehead. She leaned back up and I felt her hand caress my cheek as her eyes never left mine. "You're awake," I stared up at her confused. "How are you feeling?" her hand caressed my cheek.

"I feel dizzy," I said as she nodded. "My head hurts like hell and my shoulder hurts," I explained as she was staring at me.

"Your shoulder hurts because you're not wearing your sling like the doctor told you to," she stared at me.

I stared back up at her confused more than ever. "What?" I slowly sat up and pain shot through my head. I ignored it as I grabbed my shirt and pulled it down below my shoulder.

I stared at my shoulder and couldn't believe what I was looking at. My mind was racing and my heart was pounding as I was clearly confused.

The scar was there in plain view, surrounded by a bruise the size of a fist.

I heard Carol, "Babe, lay back down,"

I looked at her as she was staring at me with concern. I shook my head, "What's going on?" I asked. I didn't know what was happening but I was terrified more than ever now.

I heard the door open and I saw Richard walk in. He stopped when he saw me, "You're awake," he came to the bed and sat down while looking at me. "How are you feeling?" he asked.

Before I said anything, Carol spoke, "She's confused right now,"

He nodded and looked at me, "That's normal. Carol said you took a bad fall,"

I stared at him then looked at Carol, "What happened?" I asked.

She looked at me, "You came home and when you walked into the bedroom, you fainted," she looked at Richard for a moment then back at me, "I called Richard because I didn't know what to do and you weren't responding but you were breathing," she stared at me. "He said that we didn't need to call the ambulance or anything as long as you were resting,"

I looked at Richard as he was looking at me, "I don't remember that," I looked back at Carol, "I don't remember anything,"

She stared at me, "What do you remember?"

I hesitated as I stared at her, "How long was I out?" I asked.

She looked at Richard as he spoke, "About two hours," he looked at her. "Maybe three,"

I sat there confused as hell because I didn't know what was going on. I didn't know if my mind was playing tricks on me or what, but my head was pounding and it was getting worse.

"Terry," I heard Carol say. I looked at her as she was staring at me. "Where were you?" she asked.

I gave her a confused look, "What do you mean?" I questioned.

She sighed, "After we went to find the gender of the baby, and when we got home, you didn't come inside. You never came inside and you were gone for hours. I tried calling you, but you never answered. Then, when you did come home, you were acting weird then you fainted," she stared at me.

I thought.

We went to find out the gender of our baby?

I looked at her, "What's the gender of our baby?" I asked.

She stared at me, "A boy,"

It felt like my breath was getting caught in my throat. I didn't know what to do because the air was thinning out and my mind was racing.

That was a dream?

I stared at them for a moment, "Wait," I paused. "So, what happened with Harge was real?" I asked.

They both nodded and I felt like I was about to throw up. "Baby," Carol started rubbing my back. "Lay back down,"

I shook my head as I tried to keep everything down and not come up. I heard Richard, "Terry, do you remember where you were?"

I tried to think as hard as I could.

Harge's brother.

I went to his house and that's the last thing I remember. That's the last thing that happened before everything started getting weird and my mind started fucking up.

I looked at Carol, "I went to see John," she stared at me. "Harge's brother," she gave me a confused look.

"John?" I nodded. "Why did you go see him?"

I shrugged, "I guess I needed answers. I don't know, I thought that was the best thing to do since you wouldn't talk to me," I stared at her.

Now I remember everything that happened.

She stared at me, "You shouldn't have gone to see him," I gave her a confused look. "He's just as bad as Harge was,"

I stared at her until Richard spoke, "What do you mean he's just as bad?" he asked.

I looked at Carol as she looked at me, "What happened while you were there?" she asked.

I shrugged, "I asked him why Harge killed himself, and he told me something about his mom and then you," I paused while she was looking at me. "He said he didn't blame me for his death, and he said that he was one who shot me," I paused as she was staring at me.

"What else?"

I shrugged and started thinking, "We hugged afterwards and he asked if I wanted something to drink, then after I left, I came home," I paused and watched them until I remembered something else. "Oh, and I started feeling weird when I was driving and I remember not being able to walk straight and my head was spinning a lot," I explained.

They both stared at me for a moment and I couldn't figure out what was happening. Richard finally stood up and ran his hand through his hair. He sighed as he turned around and stared at me, "Terry," I stared back at him.

"I think you were drugged,"

*

I sat on the couch while I heard Carol and Richard in the kitchen. My head still felt weird but I was recovering. I think Carol called the police after Richard explained everything to us about John giving me a drink.

I knew better than to trust him, but I did.

I can't believe that everything that I thought happened, didn't happen. When I fainted, I must have relived what I went through, but without all the consequences.

I guess all good things must come to an end.

I surely thought that I was giving a second chance not to fuck anything up, but of course, nothing like that ever happens.

I touched my shoulder and I felt pain shoot through it. I winced then sighed as I sat there feeling terrible about everything.

I don't think it's the drugs, if that's what they were, that are making me feel like this. It's the fact that my mind is fucked up and hurts from everything. I don't understand how drugs can make you dream something like that, but apparently they can.

I heard Carol's voice, "The police are coming by to talk to you," she sat down next to me and looked me over. "How are you feeling now?"

I shrugged then winced at my shoulder. I sighed, "I guess I'm ok," I looked at her. "I'm sorry,"

She shook her head, "Don't be," she moved closer to me, "I'm just glad you're ok," she rubbed my leg and I slightly smiled at her as she smiled back.

The fight we had before I went to see John, was in the back of my mind and I couldn't get over the fact that I shouldn't have kept pushing her. I shouldn't have asked her over and over again, when clearly she didn't want to talk about it.

It was none of my business and I should have just left it alone.

None of this shit would have happened and I wouldn't feel so terrible about everything at the moment.

It was a lot to take in to say the least. It felt like I was going crazy because of how real everything felt, but at the same time, I could blame it on the fact that maybe, just maybe, I was drugged.

After a while, the police came and asked me questions regarding John and I was honest with them, because I wanted him to be arrested for what he did. I was stupid enough to think that this guy wasn't bad, and that I could trust him, but it turned out that he was worse than Harge.

I told the police about him shooting me, and that he was the one who did so, and that I bet he wasn't smart enough to remove the gun from the house. If he was dumb enough to drug me and think he could get away with it, then he could be dumb enough to forget to hide the weapon that almost killed me.

After they left, I felt relieved because it was too much pressure having them here and asking questions after questions.

I had my head laying on Carol's lap and I looked over at Richard as he was sitting on the chair. I looked him over and couldn't believe that I was stupid enough to put him and Stephanie in danger.

Once again, everything was my fault.

I looked up at Carol as she was watching TV. I took in her features as I was admiring her and how beautiful she really was.

I hated myself.

I honestly did.

Look what I did. I put everyone I love in danger because of my stupid actions. I never can learn, and it seems like I assume things before I think them through.

She caught me staring and looked down at me. We stared at each other for a moment until she brushed the hair from my face and smiled at me, "What?" she asked.

I smiled back, "I was just thinking,"

"About?"

I sighed, "How stupid I am. I don't know," I couldn't come up with an answer because I didn't have one.

She continued to stare at me, "Baby, it's ok," I stared at her. "I forgive you," she caressed my cheek as I felt my heart swell. "Everyone makes mistakes and nobody is perfect. I don't want you blaming yourself for what happened because you didn't know,"

I felt like crying but I held it together. "We got into fights because of how stupid I am,"

She sighed, "Yes, I know. But that doesn't matter anymore. I blame myself for picking fights with you when I didn't understand, I'm sorry," she stared at me.

I stared up at her, "Don't apologise. You're not to blame," I watched as she never broke eye contact with me. "I learned my lesson about assuming things before thinking because it could put my life in danger," I stared at her. "I'm sorry,"

She smiled and caressed my cheek, "Like I said before, I forgive you," I smiled up at her.

I looked over at Richard, "I'm sorry Richard," he looked at me as I smiled. "I'm sorry I'm an idiot, I never meant to drag you into my problems,"

He smiled at me, "You're forgiven. i'm sorry for everything I said, I never meant it and you know that, I was just mad at the moment," he shrugged and I nodded.

I laid there while Carol ran her hand through my hair and I smiled as I felt happiness.

I guess everything happens for a reason, and if it wasn't for most things to go wrong, nothing would go right. I wouldn't be put in situations where in the end I was actually happy ever after.

I guess you could say that what happened, happened. But it was all over, and maybe if I didn't do what I did, everything would be perfect the way I dreamt it out to be, but what's life without little consequences?

Everyone needs a little trouble in their life, because what would life be without a little obstacles in their way to make their ending worth it all?

I'm not saying it's the ending because it's far from it, but soon enough, everything comes to an end, but when the moment comes, I'll be ready for it.