"No, I'm fine. Alam kong marami ka ring problema. Just don't mind me. I don't want to be a burden."

"But you're not a burden to me, Anne. We're best friends."

"Yes, we are, and I don't want you to feel bad about me. I'm sorry for crying and making you worried."

The day passed quickly.

Anne and I don't see each other very often because every time I invite her to eat or come home, she has something to go to or do. I don't know what is happening to her or what she is going through. I couldn't even ask her personally how she was doing because she was busy. Even when I call or text her, she doesn't call me back or even reply. I am really worried after seeing her in tears that day.

I took a deep breath. Kahit na gustong-gusto kong malaman ang pinagdadaanan niya, hindi ko siya gustong pilitin dahil kailangan kong respetuhin ang kagustuhan niya. Maybe that's how she handles it all. She doesn't share. She will only tell me everything when she solves it. I guess I'll just wait for her. Maybe she wants to be alone in the meantime.

I heaved a sigh when Professor Aquino summoned me to his office because I was absent the other day during his period. That was the day I was late when Jhon Rey picked me up from home. I admit it's my fault; that's why I'm here and summoned by him. He is also the professor who gave us the project of writing a letter to someone who hurts us the most. Sighs. I remembered that thing again.

I first knocked on the door of his office, and when I heard him let me in, I went there.

"Miss Velasco, kindly take a seat. I want to show you your possible grades after this semester."

He presented me with his laptop, where I could see the computation of my grades and also those of my classmates.

"As I've told you all, I will not give you the final exam; instead, I will give you a special project. But still, it doesn't mean that you can be absent whenever you want. Here's how your attendance will affect your final grades." He pointed to the red one in the cell.

"Kung mawawala ka ulit sa klase ko, your grades will be dragged. We're aiming for your grade to be a flat one, so you can be a summa cum laude of your batch, so please be guided by your absences," he explained.

"Yes, professor, this won't happen again. Thank you for telling me this."

"Good to hear that. How about your project? Is there any progress?" tanong niya na hindi ko alam kung paano sagutin. I still haven't started working on that. Not because I'm lazy or anything. I'm just afraid of what answer I'll receive when that certain someone reads the letter I'm going to send.

"Hindi pa po."

"Alright. Just be sure you can pass it on time. You can go now."

I bowed before I left his office.

"Are you going home now?" I was surprised when Jhon Rey was there outside the office; it seemed like he was waiting for me. "Let's go home together."

"O-okay."

But I was about to go with him when my phone rang. I was expecting that Anne's name would be the one that would flash on the screen, but it was my mom. I feel the sudden rush of my blood to my heart. I think I know now why she's calling me this time.

I took a deep breath before I answered her call.

"Sheen May, where are you?" Sa tono palang ng bungad ni mommy, alam ko na ang dahilan kung bakit siya napatawag.

"I'm in school, mom," sagot ko.

"Your dad wants you in his office."

The nervousness grew inside my chest. It's always like this. Every time I am summoned to my dad's office, I always feel like my end is near. My hands began to tremble.

"Are you okay?" tanong ni Jhon Rey nang ibaba ko ang tawag. I honestly shook my head, and I immediately found my way out.

"Hey! Where are you going? Aren't you coming home?".

"I'm going home. To my real home."

"Alright. I'll drive you home."

"No, I'm fine," sagot ko bago ako muling lumingon sa kaniya. I looked at his face for a moment. This might be the last time I see him this close. "I'll just pick up my things later."

"What? But why?"

"It's so nice meeting you."

I smiled as I walked away from him. I immediately grabbed a taxi and went home. My heart is pounding heavily. Our maids greeted me as I entered the house, and the traces on their faces are familiar. It seems like there will be someone who will see her end tonight. Lalo na nang makita ko si Mommy sa harap ng main door.

"Honey, why didn't you tell me?" she proclaimed. Her looks were really worried about me and what kind of punishment I would receive this time.

Hindi ko sinagot si Mommy at naglakad na lamang papunta sa opisina ni dad habang dala-dala ang malaking takot sa dibdib ko. I can't help but think about how many bruises or how much blood I would lose just by entering that room.

I knocked and held on to the doorknob. My knees were shaking as I opened the door.

I bit my lip and shut my eyes. Every time I go into this office, I remember how he punishes me when I make a mistake.

It is one of the reasons why I want to graduate with flying colors. I don't want to be a disappointment to my family, especially to my father.

Nakatanggap na ako ng maraming pasa nang minsang paluin niya ako ng golf club dahil bumagsak ako sa pagiging top student sa klase. Naaalala ko pa kung paano niya ako tratuhin, kung ilang beses niya akong saktan, sampalin at paulanan ng suntok dahil sa mga pagkakamaling nagagaw ako. I surely can understand why he does this every time because he wants a son, but then I was born. He accepted me and trained me to be a perfect daughter, but I cannot, and that disappoints him so much. May karapatan siyang gawin ang lahat ng iyon sa akin, anak lang naman niya ako.

"What took you so long?" said Dad, when he noticed me entering his office. He is currently holding his revolver and inserting a bullet.

"I-I just came home," I stuttered.

"Where have you been these past few days?"

"At Jhunel's house, dad," I tried to lie, because maybe that was an automatic response from me, even though I knew he maybe knew it all since he was immediately back from his business trip. I saw him smirk.

"You can lie on my face now?" I felt particularly scared when he pointed the gun at me. My breath stopped. I felt the shaking of my knee even the cold grain of sweat dripped at the side of my ear. "How come you're with him when he's with me?" He perfectly curved an evil smile. I gasped, trying to contain myself. I might die today for lying to my father.

"W-what do you mean, dad?" nagtataka kong tanong.

"Your ex-boyfriend was with me yesterday. How come you're with him?"

I bit my lip, stopping myself from concluding why they were together.

"We were planning our business merged and your marriage."

I felt weak. I was devastated when I heard that. I can feel that at any moment I will be in tears.

"Dad, please don't do this. He was my ex-boyfriend and I don't want to be with him again. I suffered so much when he cheated on me," pakiusap ko. "Dad, please, I'm going to do everything you asked for, but please, don't make me marry someone I don't love. I'm holding back my tears. He will be angrier if I cry in this situation. But the hell, I clearly don't want to marry someone, especially that guy!

"Only sons can choose someone to marry, not you."

Hindi ko na napigilan ang mga luha ko dahil sa nanunuot na kalungkutan sa dibdib.

"Love is not the only reason you're marrying someone. Marriage is a business, and you'll do it this time not for the sake of love. You're smart to understand that, right?"

I felt like the earth and the whole universe had struck me down. I felt like the only freedom I had was not mine anymore.

"You don't need to graduate from being a summa cum laude now. You just forget about it and focus on your marriage," dagdag pa niya.

"Dad, please, don't do this to me."

I kneeled down—the last hope I have—for him to take back what he said.

"And then what? You'll conspire with Carpio's family and betray me? I know what you are doing even when I'm away. You were in his house!" He gritted his teeth. " And I heard he was your boyfriend."

"N-no, dad. It was just a lie," pagtanggi ko sa gitna ng mga hikbi.

"What do you mean by a lie? You seem so into lying nowadays. Who taught you that? That Carpio's son?"

"No, dad," nanginginig kong salita habang nakaluhod sa harap niya. "I was just trying to get rid of my ex-boyfriend. That's why I told him that Jhon Rey and I were dating, but Jhon Rey has nothing to do with it. It was all me. Please forgive me if I lie. I won't do it again, I promised."

"Then, let's see if this revolver will give you another chance."

He put the revolver on his table and tossed it to me. I couldn't speak because I was taken away by my dad's possible plans.

"There's only one empty cartridge in this revolver. You can have what you want if you win," he warned.

"D-dad, I-I don't want to." I shook my head repeatedly as I begged him.

"You can aim it at me first."

I gasped as I could sense his confidence in this bet. My hands are all shaking, and my tears are not stopping. What should I do? I don't want to pull the trigger. I don't want to kill anyone.

"Dad, I can't. Just punish me with anything other than this." Muli kong ibinaba ang baril sa ibabaw ng lamesa niya.

"Kung gano'n ako na ang mauuna."

He quickly grabbed the gun and confessed to me. I closed my eyes as he quickly pulled the trigger. My breath stopped as I waited for me to disappear from the world. I heard a loud glee coming from my father. "You're lucky."

I fell, and everything went black.