"Don't overthink," I remembered from what Jhon Rey had said earlier. Why would he be so caring? Is he trying to tame me again?

Tsk. No matter how hard I think about why he suddenly changed, I can't find the answer.

I'll sleep it off now.

The next day, I wondered why my classmates were looking at me when I entered the room. Thank you; I knew it. Their silence was only momentary. They will return to their everyday habits, gossiping about me and my life. How lowly.

I saw Anne, so I waved to her. Her eyes widened, which surprised me.

"The eff? So the news is true? You're engaged?" Anne asked with her strident voice while holding my hand, checking the ring I was wearing. "Since when?" she added.

"Huh? J-just yesterday," I simply answered. I noticed how my classmates were also surprised. They do really have good ears.

"OMG! Did he propose to you at a Japanese Restaurant? Someone saw you last night!"

I was shocked. Did someone see us there?

"Come on, tell me what happened! Did you finally get back together with your ex-boyfriend? I left you for a while yesterday, and suddenly, you immediately got engaged! I'm envious!"

I frowned.

"Uh? I think you got the wrong news." I walked to my seat. She followed me.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know why you're happy because you thought Jhunel and I got back together, but this ring—it wasn't from him. It was from Jhon Rey."

She backed away.

"So he already proposed to you?" sambit ni dad nang makapasok muli ako sa bahay. He was sitting on the couch, wearing that smirk.

"He did," I answered. Mukhang hinintay niya ang pagbalik ko.

"I never thought he'd do it quickly. He must be in a rush."

My shoulders slumped. What is he trying to imply—that Jhon Rey is rushing to complete his mission and get a divorce?

Aren't they the ones who want it—to propose Jhon Rey to me? Jhon Rey abides by what they want. Why don't they seem satisfied?

"Don't put your hopes up, Sheen May. Don't trust him yet. He must be plotting something," he warned.

"What do you mean, Dad? I thought you were planning for us to marry each other to cause a ceasefire against Carpio's family. Why are you telling me this now? I'm so confused," habol kong tanong sa kaniya. Hindi ko alam kung saan ako nakakuha ng lakas ng loob na magtanong sa kaniya nang ganoon.

Nilingon niya ako. Ito ang unang beses na nagtagpo nang matagal ang mga mata namin. "Hear this out. You marrying that man will cause a temporary halt in this mess, but it is not an assurance that they will not betray us after they gain this power back. So I want you to be careful and yet be observant. He might hurt you again," he advised as he returned to his office.

I don't understand why they are speculative about Jhon Rey's move. Ginagawa niya na nga itong kasal kahit saliwat sa kagustuhan niya. Ayokong maging katulad nila na para bang mahirap magtiwala sa ibang tao. Hindi ako magiging masaya kung magiging ganoon ako. Sa totoo nga lang, tila ba nagiging ganoon na rin ako dahil pinapakain nila ako ng mga bagay na negatibo na naglilikha ng pag-aalinlangan sa akin.

Hindi ba sila masaya na hindi na namin sila sinusuway? Hindi ko tuloy maiwasang makaramdam ng lungkot para kay Jhon Rey. Dahil sa akin, kailangan niya ring magdusa. And now it feels like they are telling me to stay away from him when they wanted me to get married to him. How ironic.

Hindi nga ba ako dapat na magtiwala kay Jhon Rey?

Then, I'll just give him the benefit of the doubt—for me to have peace.

And somehow, it is the first time Dad has talked to me like that.

Why are people suddenly changing their attitude toward me now?

It feels weird.

Pumasok na ko sa kwarto ko at naglinis bago ako humiga sa kama ko. Disappointment is still in my heart. I know I should be happy because, finally, this will be fixed. Jhon Rey is now taking responsibility for our son, but why do I feel sad for Jhon Rey? Am I worried because his happiness was destroyed?

Do I like him that much?

Nakatingin lang ako sa kisame, habang binabalikan ang mga nangyari ngayong araw.
Ang dami.
Nag-away kami ni Jhon Rey.
Dumugo 'yong kamay ko, pero dinala niya ako agad sa infirmary.
We had a little conversation, and there he proposed. I never really imagined he'd do that. Tapos, pumunta kami sa fair at sa Japanese restaurant.

He comforted me and said things to me when I cried at that time. Those words warm my heart. He stayed beside me.

Napabuntong-hininga ako. I can't get his face out of my mind. Muli na namang bumibilis ang tibok ng puso ko. Iniisip ko palang siya ganito na ang epekto sa akin.

But I suddenly stopped daydreaming when I remembered what Dad had said and what Derrick had explained—that I shouldn't trust my soon-to-be husband. Even if we get married, the trouble in our family will not end. Jhon Rey may be just using me to get revenge on our family.

I don't know what to believe anymore.

I need some clarification.

Out of the blue, Jhon Rey showed me his caring side.

And yet, I don't want to think badly about it.

"Don't think too much," naalala ko ang sinabi ni Jhon Rey kanina. Why would he be so caring? Is he trying to tame me again?

Sabagay, kahit anong gawin kong isip kung bakit bigla siyang nagbago ay hindi ko mahahanap ang sagot. Itutulog ko na lang 'to.

Kinabukasan, nagtataka ako kung bakit pagpasok ko ng room nagtitinginan sa akin 'yong mga kaklase ko. Tsk. I knew it. 'Yong katahimikan nila ay pang-isang linggo lang. Babalik at babalik sila sa normal nilang mga ugali. How lowly.

Nakita ko si Anne, kaya kumaway ako sa kaniya. Her eyes widened, which surprised me.

"The eff? So the news is true? You're engaged?" tanong ni Anne habang hawak hawak ang kamay ko at sige sa suri sa singsing na suot ko. "Kailan pa?" dagdag pa niya.

"Ha? K-kahapon lang," simpleng sagot ko. I noticed how my classmates were also surprised. They do really have good ears.

"OMG! Doon ba siya nagpropose sa Japanese restaurant? May nakakita raw sa inyo kagabi!"

I was shocked. May nakakita sa amin doon?

"Come on, tell me what happened! Did you finally get back together with your ex-boyfriend? I left you for a while yesterday, and suddenly, you immediately got engaged! I'm envious!"

Natigilan ako sa sinabi niya.

"Uh? I think, mali ka ng nasagap na balita." Naglakad na ako papunta sa upuan ko. Sinundan niya naman ako.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know why you're happy, dahil akala mo nagkabalikan kami ni Jhunel, pero hindi sa kaniya galing ito. It was from Jhon Rey."

Napaatras siya.

"From Jhon Rey? Are you serious? I thought he hated you. Why would he propose to you? And yet you said yes?" She looks so disappointed. Her eyebrows are knitted while she purses her lips.

"My parents wanted him to propose, kaya ginawa niya, and I accepted it since I didn't want to hinder their plan and make it worse. I wanted to protect my baby at all costs," paliwanag ko.

Napapailing naman siya na para bang hindi na makaya pa ang mga balitang ibinabalita ko sa kaniya. "I just hope your decision is for the best. So Jhon Rey was the one you were with last night? At the Japanese restaurant?"

I nodded.

"So, how was it? Your date?" pang-iintriga pa niya.

"It wasn't a date. We just went there because Jhon Rey was hungry. He didn't want to leave me alone, so maybe that's why he invited me," I emphasized.

"Tsk. Knowing him? Obviously, kaya ka naman niyang iwanan kung gustuhin niya. I know how harsh he is towards you. Why the sudden change of heart? Does he need something from you?"

Napakibit-balikat ako. "I don't know. I am confused too. He told me he wants to marry me, because he hates me clearly enough to say that he wants me to perish, but then last night, after his conversation with Doctor Patricio, he suddenly changed like a new person and treated me dearly," patuloy kong pagkukuwento ng mga nangyari kahapon.

"Doctor Patricio? Do you mean Aaron's dad? You two went there?"

Tumango ako. "Yeah, the nurse told me I should get checked up regarding the bleeding from my laceration because it might affect the child I was carrying. And Jhon Rey was there talking to Rod, so we met, and that's when he and Doctor Patricio had a private conversation. After that, we went out together," I elaborated. I don't want to be detailed about what happened yesterday because I want to cherish some moments myself.

"Woah, hindi ko na alam ang mararamdaman ko. Hindi ko pa rin malimutan ang ginawa niya noong sinugod natin siya sa unit niya, how he said those things towards you in front of his family. Nakita ko kung gaano siya kagalit sa 'yo, ngayon naman ay pakakasalan ka niya. At hindi ako makapaniwalang pumayag. But I guess you two don't have a choice," sambit pa ni Anne, bago muling bumalik sa upuan niya.

My eyes caught Jhunel, who was entering our classroom today. I was about to say hi when I saw Jhon Rey following him, who also joined the room.

I gulped. Why does Jhon Rey's presence suddenly fluster me?

He sat behind me while Jhunel was next to me, but he didn't bring any milk or anything for me. Hmm. I thought he would get me fresh milk again like what he used to, but I'll buy it anyway.

Sinulyapan niya ang kamay ko at doon, nakita niya ang singsing. Agad ko namang itinago ang kamay ko. Mukhang narinig niya na ang balita. I don't know why I felt the urge to explain everything to him. But I know he might feel down today and doesn't want to talk to me, so I won't try to approach him.

Somehow, I felt sad because, no matter how well he treated me, I couldn't reciprocate his love. After all, it's difficult to do that if my heart has something else. Kung kaya ko lang sanang turuan ang puso ko, bakit hindi?

I tried to focus on the class. I have to catch up now, especially with my absences. I may not be able to graduate if I continue slacking off when the finals are approaching. This time, I need to perfect the other subjects with exams.

Wait, I remembered. I have yet to give the letter to the person who hurt me the most. I need to give it now so I can wait for his reply.

Although, I wonder if he will reply.

The first half of the class ended, and I was about to approach Anne when someone called my name. I didn't expect him to call me in front of my classmates. Everyone knows how angry he is with me, especially with the past events at school, so my classmates were also surprised when he did that.

"Can we talk?"

I was suddenly nervous, but I just followed him. Wait, is he going to criticize the ring? Will he tell me not to wear it to school?

Jhon Rey stopped walking, so I did too.

Napayuko ako nang maramdaman kong tiningnan niya ako.

"Sorry, did I do something wrong?" I immediately asked. Muli na naman akong nakaramdam ng takot kahit na hindi ko alam kung may ginawa ba akong masama. Bakit niya ba naman kasi ako yayayaing mag-usap?

"Why are you sorry?" tanong niya. I can't look up at him to see his face. He must be outraged.

"Because I did something wrong?" tugon ko.

"And what exactly are you talking about?"

Oh, shit. I'm doomed.

"Hmm..." I scratch my head. Hindi ko rin alam.

I stepped back when I saw his hand raised. I flinched.

"Tsk. Why are you concluding things? I won't hurt you," saad pa niya.

"Sorry. It was my reflexes."

"Hush. Why are you even apologizing? I want us to talk." He seemed annoyed by the tone of his voice.

"About what?" I asked, but remained to look at the grass on the ground. Narito kami sa may garden kugn saan kami nagkausap noon.

"Can you look at me so I can see your face?" nagsusumamo niyang tanong.

I gathered up my courage. Inangat ko ang mukha ko para tagpuin ang mga mata niyang kanina pa naghihintay. Jhon Rey was staring at me with a look of annoyance on his face. He's terrifying sometimes, like Dad. Even if I'm not doing anything, I feel I've done something wrong.

"Next time, look at me when I'm trying to talk to you," he ordered.

"I-I will." I nodded. I feel relieved when the wrinkle on his forehead disappears. "What do you want to tell me?" I asked.

"Let's go home together tonight."

My eyes widened. "W-what do you mean?"

His head tilted as he observed my face. Muli na namang bumalik ang kunot sa mga noo niya. "Hey, have you forgotten? Your father invited my family to dinner."

Napasinghap ako. Oo nga pala. "I-I know, but we don't have to go home together. Why are you suddenly suggesting me that?"

"Hindi mo ba gusto?"

"It's not that I don't want to. I'm just not used to it—when you're suggesting something." I bit my lip but assured him I was still looking at him while he talked. Baka magalit siya kung aalisin ko ang mga mata ko sa kaniya o muling magbabaling ng tingin sa ibang bagay habang kausap siya.

"Tsk. Didn't I tell you not to think too much?"

"I can't help it. After your conversation with Doctor Patricio, you suddenly treat me so well," pag-amin ko.

"Ahhh..." Nakita ko siyang lumunok. "He told me not to stress you," he responded.

"Tsk. I'm even more stressed thinking about why you're acting like that. I was so used to you being rude." I turned away from him because I was hungry and wanted to eat at the cafeteria. I knew he was following me.

"So you don't want me to treat you like this?"

"I just want you to be yourself," I answered. "You can show me whoever or whatever you are. Treat me how you want to treat me. I won't budge."

Tumigil ako sa paglakad bago lumingon sa kaniya. Tama nga ako, sinusundan niya ako.

"And it won't change the fact that I still like you."