Honey falls is as presumed, small, and cute. Every home has two flags, one for the USA and one for honey falls, and it's just as Leah described it to be, like you've fallen into a movie set. I've driven a rental from the airport. I'm a day or so behind Leah now. I'm hoping she's here, but because she hasn't had a phone it's made it impossible to get hold of her. Joplin hadn't seen my messages either, but I knew Leah's parents address where she was staying, because I had sent her flowers there previously.

I drive slow to a stop outside of number twenty five, and I cut the engine. I take in the two story home, there are two white rocking chairs on the porch with honey pot cushions, and the door still has a Christmas wreath on it. The windows all have white wooden shutters with perfectly carved details in them. It's lawn is immaculate, and the flower beds are pristine with winter bedding plants. It's gorgeous. The house itself is a mix of brick and wood, the porch being wooden and painted pure white.

I take a deep breath and drop the mirror down to check how awful I looked. You could see I hadn't been sleeping. My eyes were dark. I take out a chapstick and run it across my lips, pressing them together until I tasted the raspberry flavouring. I didn't look so dead on the outside now, not as dead as I felt on the inside anyhow.

"You can do this" I beg myself. I take another purposefully deep breath letting myself breath in and out slowly before I take my purse from the passenger seat and step out of the car.

I walk up the light stoned path and walk up the two steps slowly, my hand reaching for the bumble bee door knocker. I knock two times and step back nervously.

I hear the door unlatch, and a lady with a large, kind and toothy smile beams out at me "good golly ... Morgan right" she says reaching out and taking my hands in hers "I recognise you" she says "my goodness you are beautiful" she adds, before I can even say "hello" .

"It's so nice to meet you Sadie... you are just as Leah described " I greet, smiling back with just as much enthusiasm. Sadie was shorter than Leah, broader, and blonder, but my goodness she had the kindest eyes. Leah's blue eyes. Not to mention the kindest smile I had ever seen. She made me feel instantly relaxed.

"Lee Lee never said you were in town. My goodness I could throttle her. I would have had a welcome committee for you... I've waited so long for Lee to bring someone home" she says taking my arm and leading me into the house.

It smells like freshly baked cookies and looks so homely, as if anyone who came in could take their shoes off instantly and feel they could take a seat without anyone blinking an eye over it.

"Now let me get you a drink" she says taking off to her kitchen.

I follow her through, "is Leah here" I ask.

She turns as she pours me some lemonade and hands it to me "lemonade okay" she asks unsure.

I nod and smile "perfect thank you" I say taking it and having a sip. It's cold from the fridge and extremely welcomed after a long drive from the airport.

"She's not here honey... she stayed out last night at Joplin's. I can call over and tell her to get home... she's expecting you right?" She asks.

I lick my lips and place the glass down onto the kitchen side. "No I don't think she is... but if you don't mind I would like to surprise her... so if you have Joplin's address for me... I can go right now"

She beams "of course honey hang on there a second" she says and she takes a note pad and writes it down before ripping it and handing it to me. "our Joplin lives ten minutes west... she is cute as a button, and short as a winters day, but she's Leah's other half... you will like her. I bet she's dying to meet you too"

"Thankyou... I'm so glad to have met you Sadie.  So, so glad. Leah is such a beautiful soul. I can see where she gets that from now" I compliment.

Sadie sighs and comes over with a hug "gosh Morgan I just love you. Thank you sweetheart"

"Hopefully we can do this again" I say honestly, because I still hoped there was an answer to what happened New Year's Eve, one that didn't involve Leah purposefully breaking my heart. I wouldn't believe it unless she looked at me and said it to my face.

"Of course we will..." she says unknowing of the situation at play. "Come right back here with her please... and let me make you dinner... I can't have you visit without a good meal in your belly, and some good ole fashion conversation"

"Thank you Sadie" I say as she walks me back to the door and hugs me one last time.

"Are you sure you weren't in that movie" she asks looking at me closely with her smile from ear to ear "you sure are just like that actress ..."

"I'm afraid I'm not that interesting" I confess and I smile as I turn and walk back to the rental. "But I wish I was that rich" I throw back, and she laughs as we both wave.

***

Joplin's home is larger, it's what I would describe as small town millionaire row. The street is lined in large brick built homes, eight large windows per storey, large white columns to the front, revealing a perfectly glossy front door. It's yellow, of course it is, it's honey coloured... and if I had more time, or had come here for anything but a Leah recovery mission, I would have appreciated the details of this place and basked in Leah's home town a little more appreciatively.

***
"Oh Lee" Joplin says panicked. She jumps from the couch running her hands over her face. She looks a little sweaty. I am laying on the floor on my back, propped up on some cushions as we watch trash on TV and go over last nights drowning of my sorrows antics.

"What" I ask looking up at her and registering the look on her face. I scrambled to my feet and looked to where she was hyper focused. "Morgan" I whisper, seeing her step out of a car at the curb.

"Oh my god" I say panicking and looking around the room "Joplin I can't see her... if I see her this whole thing is done. I can't lie to her face... I'm not that cruel... I'm not Annie... but I can't have her lose it all over me either" I say freaking out.

Joplin grabs my shoulders and steadies my erratic movements "Leah the only way Morgan will leave here and not turn back is if you tell her you don't love her to her face"

I shake my head "no I can't do it Jo... please help me"

She looks to me wide eyed "Leah what can I possibly say that will be enough to make her leave... without you"

***
I knock the yellow door, my hand nervously falling back to my side. I run my hand through my fair hair and push it behind my ears as I wait. I can't help the way my legs give way a little and I steady myself. My goodness I was a nervous wreck. If Leah opened this door I'm not even sure how I would cope with the sight of her. My feelings were a mix of anger and misunderstanding. There was also so much love still there with nowhere to go, it's recipient stolen away, and without so much as a conversation or a removal of it by her hand. When it came to love I didn't want to hear declarations, good or bad, nor confessions through a third party. Matters of the heart should be spoken between the two that occupied it and had shared it.

As I am about to knock for a second time the door opens and Joplin appears. She smiles nervously. She is just as described, Pocket sized, with large tightly curled hair that springs out in every direction beautifully, and green eyes that take me in a little apprehensively.

"Joplin" I ask with a smile.

She opens the door wider and sticks out her hand "The one and only" she returns "Morgan..." she questions.

I nod with a smile that she returns "it's so nice to meet you I've heard so much about you" she confesses and then it's like she stops herself mid sentence and reels it all back in "what brings you to my door this fine morning" she asks.

I can't help but look behind her as if she's hiding something. Her body language is a little shifty all of a sudden.

"Is Leah here" I ask.

She kind of bites her lip, and takes a moment before answering "she's not" she says as she comes out onto the porch and shuts the door behind her. Her back to it. She gestures to the seats beside the door.

I take a seat and she sits opposite, her hands on her knees "I heard about what happened in New York" she confesses.

"Is she okay" I ask.

Joplin looks to me, her eyes filled with remorse and surprise "you want to know if she's okay after she left you there like that"

I feel nausea rise from my stomach. I place my hand there upon my sweater and take a second, to just breath through the way that made me feel.

"I'm so sorry" Joplin says reaching to place her hand on mine "I didn't mean it to come out so bluntly... please excuse my idiocy... Morgan I didn't mean to upset you"

I turn back to her and smile reassuringly "honestly you didn't... it just hits a little hard... not your fault. It's the facts I'm dealing with right now... but are they" I ask.

She frowns. "Are they what"

"Facts" I return.

Joplin squirms a little. She's not very good at lying it seems and I can see it written all over her face... that there was more to this, and that she was helping to bury it.

"I don't know what the facts are Morgan... I just know Leah came home really heartbroken to have hurt you... but she knew she wasn't ready to commit to something so intense right now. She's got a season coming in four short months, and a lot of training. She could be moving city entirely again soon. Long distance would have been too painful"

I gulp, all of that sounded quite plausible if not for the fact she couldn't tell me that to my face, no, that was the tell. Leah wasn't the one doing the break up. She was getting everyone else to break it to me, and hiding, but I knew that wasn't her M.O.

"So why can't she come out here and tell me that herself" I ask, pointing toward the door beside us and raising my eyebrows.

Joplin again gives herself away and brushes it off "she's not in there" she lies.

I shake my head "oh really" I ask one eyebrow cocked "I don't believe you"

She sits forward "Morgan ... there's something you don't know"

My attention goes from the door straight back to her "what" I ask.

She looks pained, her eyebrows knit together, her freckles on her nose creasing "Morgan, Leah has got a little closer to Spencer since she's been home. It's where she is right now, with Spencer... she stayed over there last night" she says slowly, like it pained her to reveal each and every word. Its like my heart is squeezed so hard it stops beating entirely and my mouth falls open. My eyes fill instantly.

Joplin looks a little panicked as I stand and she looks into my eyes "oh Morgan I'm so sorry"

I walk back down the steps and over to the rental. I start the car and take off with blurred vision, having to stop as soon as soon as I'm out of eye sight to let the sobs come and release. She was seeing the school friend she told me not to worry about. Of course... you know sometimes it felt as if I was living in a recurring nightmare. Why was I never enough?!

I had quite clearly read Leah wrong from the jump. She was moving on as if she never even cared, and although I still found it hard to believe how very badly I had got this all wrong, like there was something more, it was time for me to concede, that this love was not mine.

***
I stand in the window and watch her leave, and tears stream down my cheeks. Joplin comes back inside looking furious "I just broke her fucking heart Lee... it was unfair of you to have me do that... to lie to her like that"

"I'm so sorry Jo" I say reaching for her but she shirks me off.

"She literally just broke in front of me" she says sitting on the couch and holding her face in her hands. "Why can't we just go after her and explain what Annie has done Leah..." she says releasing her hands and looking back to me "surely it's better than this pain you are both in now? You haven't stopped crying for more than five minutes these last two days and she's clearly broken too"

I sit beside Joplin, making her body fall against my arm. "Because Annie would take her children from her... she wouldn't ever stop Joplin... if I have to make her believe this for a few months until those papers are signed and the custody is finalised then I will. I have to get her away from her, once and for all. If Annie thinks I'm gone forever though, she's got another thing coming. I'm not letting her go. I can't... I love her Jo. I love her so much I feel like I can barely breath right now knowing she's here and she's in so much pain" I begin to sob. The realisation of what this is doing to her, and the anger that Annie is doing this to us both. I wanted to end her for this torture. She was evil.

"I will make this right... I just need a few months... to make this all better and then I'm coming back for her Joplin... I just hope by then she will understand and forgive me"