Pierce insisted that Michael give him a ride and pay for his lunch, because "gas isn't cheap" and I could be having sex with my husband instead of getting lunch with you so you owe me".

"That's a visual I didn't need," Michael responded, only to have Pierce hang up on him. "That's great".

"Hang up on you?" Daniel asked, not looking up from from the textbook he had taken out after concluding his meal. It had been a surprise to Michael when he did it, since he was under the impression that he was the only one of the triples who actually studied, but there Daniel was, reading about Business Stats and working out practice problems in a notebook.

"Yeah," Michael confirmed. "No surprise there, I guess". Most phone calls with Pierce ended with an abrupt ending. He even hung up on his husband a lot of the time. "I should probably go pick him up before him and Tyler start fucking and I have to wait".

"Yeah," Daniel agreed absently, scribbling something out on his sheet of paper. Michael watched the action, still surprised that Daniel was studying and seemingly taking it seriously before throwing a quick glance into the empty kitchen.

Ian has taken his leave to the small back room where the workers were allowed to spend their free time not long after Joe had left. It was probably better for the progress of Michael's studying, but he had been hoping they could talk a little more after their conversation had to be cut short earlier in order for Michael to make it to his exam on time. For a brief second, Michael considered stopping in to say goodbye, but Daniel was right there and there was no way he wouldn't find that suspicious, and him and Ian had just agreed that morning to start over and that was kind of strange behavior for people who had just met that morning.

It was strange behavior for people who had met three days ago in a grocery store and lightly flirted as well, but Michael dismissed these thoughts with a shake of his head and a mumbled goodbye to his brother.

Pierce's apartment wasn't far from the house, so before Michael had even prepared what to say his older brother was climbing into the passenger seat of his car, reclining the chair so he could lay back and stare at the cars roof. "Uh, hi," Michael greeted awkwardly, and Pierce's strange eyes– he had somehow inherited one of their mother's golden eyes, and one of their father's blue ones– shifted over to look at him for a moment.

"Don't make small talk, Michael," he demanded, looking away again before closing his eyes. Michael directed his attention over his shoulder as he backed out of his parking spot. "We've never been ones to talk just for the sake of it".

"You're thinking of Daniel," Michael responded. "I'm Michael. The-"

"Push over," Pierce chimed in and Michael scoffed. "You have no self awareness. You've always just done what our family members want you to do". That had always been true, but Michael felt that it was slightly less true now that it was before. "Now you're thinking about how tensions are running high between you and Joe because you've started to push back slightly and he doesn't like that".

"Don't do that," Michael snapped, annoyed. It shouldn't have surprised him that Pierce was already pissing him off, but for some reason, every time they went a while without seeing one another, Michael convinced himself that Pierce was a good person to talk to and could actually be supportive.

"Do what?" Pierce asked, bracing himself against the car door as Michael took a sharp turn out of the parking lot. "Jesus, slow down. Mom's getting worried about your driving, you know".

"Don't try and read me like that and then tell me what I'm thinking," Michael accused, and Pierce chuckled lightly. "It's annoying".

"It was what you were thinking though," Pierce said with complete confidence. "I wasn't reading you though. Its not like I'm insightful enough to just pick up on the fact that you've finally grown enough of a spine to stand up to the steamroller that is Joe. Daniel actually told me about it".

"Daniel?" Michael asked, eyebrows shooting up. "You and Daniel have been talking?"

"Not really," Pierce denied. When Michael shot a look at him, he noticed that Pierce had cracked his eyes open to stare at the street in front of them, eye lashes casting shadows over his cheek bones. "About a week ago Tyler talked me into going to this new coffee shop with him because he didn't want to sit there and study alone, and we ran into Daniel and he updated me on how annoying you and Joe have been for the last couple of months".

"Daniel was by himself at a coffee shop?" Michael inquired, confused. "What was he doing there?"

"I couldn't care less," Pierce provided unhelpfully. Michael shot him a look, and his older brother returned it with just as much vigor for a long moment before sighing in defeat. "Tyler asked him that, and he said that sometimes he just wanted to get out of the house. Apparently while you annoy Joe, he still misses you when you're driving yourself crazy studying and stuff so he projects all his feelings and neediness onto Daniel who can only take so much of it".

Michael thought of how happy Joe had looked when he joined them in playing video games on Friday night. "It's just... hard to talk to them sometimes".

"Is that why you wanted to get lunch?" Pierce asked, sounding quite displeased. "So you have someone to talk to about your feelings since neither of them know-"

"No," Michael cut in, slowing to a stop at a red light. He could see the sign of the diner they were going to up ahead, but had half a mind to turn the car around and go back the way they had come. "You would literally be the worst person to talk to about feelings and I know that. All you do is tell people that they're stupid and wrong. I don't know how Tyler even puts up with you".

"We put up with each other," Pierce corrected, his voice taking a slightly softer tone at the mention of his husband. "It's nice".

"I don't want to talk to you about feelings," Michael repeated. The light in front of them turned green and Micahel sped through the intersection in order to get into the right lane. "I want to talk to you about our father and our brothers". There wasn't an immediate response, so Michael threw a glance at his brother out of the correr of his eye, only to find him looking back at him with raised eyebrows. "What?"

"I wasn't actually expecting to ever have this conversation with you," Pierce admitted, slamming his hand against the car window to brace himself as Michael nearly missed the turn to the diner but took it anyways. "Oh my god! Who taught you how to drive?"

"You requested that I drive," Michael reminded, pulling into the closest available parking spot to the door. "And what do you mean you never expected to have this conversation with me. Who else would I talk to? Kalen? Kalen can't help me. He didn't even talk to dad about deciding not to major in business. He signed up for all of his rock classes and then waited for dad to realize it on his own. I can't do that. I still live with him, I've been a business major for the last three years, and as far as he knows, that's my only major. I can't tell him that I'm going to drop but, don't worry. I'm gonna fall back on french. And that's only half of my issue! I still need to come out to Daniel and Joe on top of that".

"Geology," Pierce corrected lowly, as if Michael hadn't know this was the right word. "You know he gets mad when you refer to them as rock classes".

"James started it".

"When I said I wasn't expecting to have this conversation with you, I didn't mean I was expecting you to have it with someone else," Pierce elaborated, and Michael made a confused face. "Why don't we talk about this inside. I want to make sure you actually buy me food". Before Michael could agree, Pierce was climbing out of the car, shutting the door between them.

As he too got out of the car, Michael wondered why Garett liked Pierce so much. Maybe it was because he found everything funny, even Pierce's impatience and short temper, or maybe it was because Pierce was less of a dick to Garett than he was to the rest of them. "Come on, Michael," Pierce prompted. "I have to go to work in a few hours and I would like to spend at least a little bit of my free time at home".

"You were there all morning," Michael grumbled, but not loud enough that his angriest brother could hear him to avoid a response. They went inside and Pierce immediately lead them to a booth in the back of the restaurant.

It wasn't likely that they would be recognized– they were both wearing sweatpants and t-shirts, not the typical Bradford attire– but it was still smart to be safe, especially sine they were going to be discussing their family. If the wrong people overheard them it could be bad. News about the Bradfords spread quickly in the small suburb.

Neither of them spoke until the waitress had delivered menus to their table, but as soon as she was out of hearing distance Pierce was saying, "I thought you would always just give in to dad. I didn't think you'd ever be at the point where you were preparing to talk to him".

"I suppose that's not surprising since you think I'm a pushover," Michael commented, looking over the menu with a small frown. Nothing looked bad, and there were plenty of options for him to chose from, but he would rather be eating something prepared by Ian after tasting the croissant he had made for breakfast.

"Michael, you spent years just standing by and watching Joe and Daniel discriminate against people because they were like you, and you never did anything about it even though it hurt you," Pierce pointed out, and Michael opened his mouth to protest. "And don't give me that if I told them to stop they would know that I was gay shit, because you could have simply just told them to stop being assholes.

"Does that really make me a pushover though? Or just kind of pathetic?"

"What about that time that you guys wanted to get high so Joe made you buy that absurd amount of weed incase you get caught, and then made you keep it in your room so if anyone found it, it would be on you?'

"That was kind of fair," Michael protested. "I mean, Joe and I were the ones who wanted it, and he paid-"

"Dad paid," Pierce corrected, and Michael grimaced.

"Yeah, well Joe got the money, so the rest was my role".

"And it didn't bother you that he made you do everything that had risk?" Pierce inquired, and Michael thought back.

"I mean, I was annoyed, sure, but nothing happened, so it doesn't really-"

"But if something had happened you would have taken all the fall," Pierce cut in. "You always end up in this situations, Michael. Because you're a pushover".

"You've made your point". There were many more instances that could be used as supporting evidence, so it seemed smart to cut Pierce off then. "Just... help me, Pierce. Please. I have to student teach next semester and I need to tell dad about it somehow".

"If you're looking for a way to tell dad that you're not going to major in his field anymore in a way that wont majorly piss him off, I'm probably not the person to talk to," Pierce claimed. Before Michael could respond, the waitress had returned to take their drink orders. "Water and coffee for the both of us".

"Right away sir," she agreed, straighting at the authority in Pierce's voice before scurrying away.

"Did you just order for me?" Michael inquired, eyebrows drawing together. "I'm twenty-one".

"Michael," Pierce groaned, sounding impatient. For the time being, Michael let the drink thing go.

Pushover.

"I know you're not a good person to talk to, but you're the only person to talk to so I'm asking you for some advice, even if it's shitty. How did you go about telling our father that you were going to go to technical school?"

It took Pierce a very long time to respond, long enough that the waitress dropped off their drinks and left with their orders scribbled on her note pad. "It wasn't actually very hard for me," Pierce admitted. "But dad already strongly disliked me at that point and expected nothing better from me. You on the other hand, are one of the favorites".

"I'm not," Michael protested softly. "I'm neutral. I see our parents less than you probably do".

"You're a triplet, so you're a favorite," Pierce dismissed, slowly sipping at his black coffee. "Dad expects the three of you to concur. He never expected greatness from me".

"This isn't making me feel any better-"

"Michael, you're going to tell him either way. Stop worrying about this. He's probably going to be upset no matter how you phrase it, but ultimately you'll be fine".

"What if he says no and tells me I need to continue to major in business?" Michael inquired. "What if he just makes me do what he wants? Then what do I do".

"Why would you even consider that happening?" Pierce was looking at him like he was stupid. "You've just got to be willing to push back a little bit. He'll give in eventually. Ever since sending Kalen to boarding school didn't keep him away from James dad realized he couldn't completely control us and stopped tying so hard".

"But..." Michael trailed off, staring down at his hands wrapped around his coffee mug. He didn't really want to drink the liquid, but it was warm against his palms and he welcomed the feeling. "He's going to be really disappointed..."

The idea was terrifying to Michael. He had spent his entire life doing what his father had asked of him just to try and make the man proud.

"Why do you care so much?" Pierce inquired. Michael didn't even know the answerer to that. It was like he had been programed over the years to strive to make his father proud of him, like it was just in his nature. It was something he felt he needed to do. "You've always been driven for the sake of other people, Michael. This french thing is the first thing you're doing for yourself, and you're still working incredibly hard to maintain a perfect GPA in business as well. Are you even happy?" Dropping his eyes, Michael shook his head.

It was hard to be happy when you were stretched too thin because of your own decisions and inability to stand up for yourself.

"Michael, you're going to have to come out eventually," Pierce said, voice incredibly soft. Pierce didn't speak to him like that often, so it immediately made Michael more alert. "You can't keep doing this".

Taking a deep breath, Michael shook his head. "One thing at a time, Pierce".

"If that's how you're looking at it, then I think coming out needs to be your first thing". Even more surprised, Michael's eyes grew wide. "Michael, you are suffocating. Think of how much this one secret, which has led to many other secrets if Tyler's summary of your questionable activities are accurate, think about how much that had changed you. You can't tell your best friends that that you'd rather fuck men than women, so now you're a liar who has to have meaningless sex with people because you can't build a healthy, loving relationship without it killing you on the inside that your brothers don't know. On top of that, you're constantly anxious that they're going to find out about all of this and hate you. You're barely yourself anymore, Michael," Pierce finished.

Words wouldn't come to Michael. He couldn't even think as he stared across the table at his brother, breaths coming out shaky. The waitress brought them their food, sliding a plate of pancakes on the table in front of the unresponsive Michael, telling them to enjoy their meal as she did.

"Have you gone mute?" Pierce asked after a minute of him eating in silence. "You haven't even looked at your food. Do you need me to-"

"No," he breathed, blinking slowly before looking down at the full plate. "No, I... sorry".

You're barely yourself anymore, Michael, kept ringing in his ears, over and over again, each time making his stomach knot tighter and tighter. Even though he no longer felt hungry, he picked up his silverware and began to cut into the first pancake.

Michael had known he had changed, and it wasn't the first time someone had confirmed that they could see it as well. Just a few days ago Daniel had mentioned it after they got home from the grocery store. He thought it was good that he was changing to protect himself, to avoid potentially disastrous situations, but hearing Pierce say it like that... hearing him describe it as Michael no longer being himself really scared him.

And it wasn't just Pierce's words that frightened him, but the fact that when he thought about them, thought about himself, he realized that he didn't recognize himself either. 

When Michael thought of who he was, he thought of someone who was patient and laid back, someone who didn't like to lie and valued spending time with his brothers because that was where he felt the happiest. That was it. He thought of someone who was happy.

He didn't know what he was now, but it wasn't that.

"Jesus," Michael groaned, shoving a piece of pancake into his mouth and chewing it slowly. "You need to stop helping Tyler study for all his psychology shit, man".

Pierce rolled his mismatched eyes, his lips quirking up at the corners. "That wasn't because of psychology, Michael. That was because I know you".

***

At home, Michael tried to resume studying in the dining room. Daniel was gone, probably off to take his own test, but other than that, everything in the room was the same, his notebook still open on the table as well as a handful of different colored pens. Michael stood in the doorway between the hall and the dining room, taking it all in, before shaking his head and continuing further down the hall.

Studying could wait. He had been tired when he had woken up that morning, and his conversation with Pierce had emotionally exhausted him as well. A nap was in order.

Five hours later, when he awoke in a dark room, the soft natural lighting he had fallen asleep to gone, he forced himself out of bed and back down the stairs to this textbooks. The kitchen was still empty, though there were new dishes in the drying rack, and he could hear the sound of his brothers– mostly Joe– in the one of the rooms down the hall.

Sighing, he sunk down into the chair he had been sitting earlier, pulling out his Business Ethics textbook and flipping it open to the page he had book marked. He was one paragraph in before the door opened in the kitchen and Ian moved into the room. "Ahh," he said, smiling. "I thought I heard someone come in here. Can I get you anything? Dinner? Coffee? You look really tired".

"I just woke up," Michael admitted, giving the older man one last long look before dragging his attention down to his textbook. "I slept a lot longer than I had intended. I still have three tests to study for". There was a pause, and then Michael recalled being asked a question. "Oh. No, I don't need anything though. Thank you".

That seemed to be the end of the conversation so Michael gave his text book his full attention, his eyes raking over all the words, pausing only when something was high lightened or underlined to show its importance. It wasn't how he preferred to study, but he had already created a study guide and memorized it, had already made flash cards of all the terms and came to understand them. Reading was just a way for him to refresh his memory for the time being. His test in wasn't until Thursday.

His next exam was Wednesday in his education class, and while he could be reviewing for that, all he had to do was put together a simple lesson and present it to his class– using notes– and he had completed that weeks ago.

With a heavy exhale, Michael let his eyes slip closed, his hands curling into light firsts against the glossy pages of his over priced book. He wouldn't have exams at the end of the next semester, if he managed to gather the courage to talk to his father. Pierce seemed to think he would be fine, in this regard, that his father would be upset but Michael would get what he wanted in the end with little conflict.

Pierce also thought that Michael was "suffocating".

"I think coming out needs to be your first thing", he had said, actually looking sympathetic, which was a look Pierce didn't wear often. Coming out had been something he thought he would have to worry about in the distant future, something he would do after he had moved out and wouldn't need to directly deal with the aftermath of the news. He didn't even have any ideas of how to come out. Hours upon hours had been spent rehearsing how to tell his father he wanted to be a French teacher more than anything, but no time had gone into finding the right words to tell his brothers that he was attracted to the opposite sex.

He doubted the right words to do that even existed.

Talking to Pierce hadn't made him feel any better. It quite possibly made him feel worse.

Michael thought of a certain message on his phone, offering him a kind of relief from his thoughts for at least a little bit.

Before he could have any second thoughts, Michael freed his cellphone from the pocket of his sweatpants and dialed a number that had become familiar to him over the past couple of weeks. Too familiar, Michael reminded, but before he could remember all the reasons he felt he had needed ot end things with Josh in friday, the other man was greeting him through the phone. "Michael Bradford," he said, sounding smug. "I must admit, I'm surprised that you called".

"Oh?" Michael asked, shooting a quick look at Ian when his voice filled the nearly silent room. The sound made the man pause, his fingers holding an uncracked egg over a bowl of what looked like chocolate frosting, but he was recovering quickly enough that Michael wondered if he had imagined it. "You're surprised to hear from me?"

"Yeah, well. I didn't think that you'd actually take me up on that offer," Josh admitted, and Michael chewed his lip, thinking about how he hadn't expected himself to take him up on it either. "It still stands, though... If that's why you're calling".

"It is," Michael confirmed immediately, and Josh chucked at his eagerness. "I just need like... an hour break to relax and take my mind off of everything".

"Ah, well. This is a service I definitely could provide," Josh claimed. "I might even have two hours just for you".

"That sounds wonderful," He breathed, closing his eyes. There was just one thing. "Is she there?"

"No". Michael relaxed further. "She should be out for a while".

"Great". He got up from his chair, waving a quick goodbye to Ian when he caught the man's eye. "I'll be right over".